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#1
Lately, my T has been yawning and seeming to nod off during our sessions. Is that all normal? It’s happened several times and I feel like he is less engaged. Is this normal with tele therapy or am I just hyper aware of what’s going on because his face is so close, which I wouldn’t normally see? What does it mean when your t is frequently feeling sleepy? Am I wrong to feel upset? a part of me feels like I am being unreasonable. It fees like he’s given up on me.
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LonesomeTonight
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#2
My old one fell asleep one time. Also she fell asleep while running a group and started snoring. No it’s not normal and I’d talk to her if it continues or upsets you.
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LonesomeTonight
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#3
Mine's openly yawned now and again, and it doesn't bother me, but he's never fallen asleep. That would bother me and we'd have to discuss that. I actually found his yawning a little endearing. He's just another human after all. Falling asleep would not be endearing at all.
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*Beth*, LonesomeTonight
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#4
My T sometimes yawns frequently. I think it may be what part of the day your session is. A non-morning person might yawn first thing in the morning, then there is the after lunch slump and again at the end of the day. Mine said he yawned mostly because I was the last appt of the day. I asked why he seemed to be getting mad at me more often over the last few months and he admitted he had less patience at that time and he suggested we move our appts to first thing in the day because he admitted he was not giving my the patience or attention I deserved. We will finally have both weekly sessions in the morning starting next week.
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LonesomeTonight
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*Beth*, LonesomeTonight, Quietmind 2
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#5
No I have never ever seen him yawn. I know I have never yawned in a session with him either.
....although I am pretty bad at eye contact so he could have snuck in a yawn when I was looking everywhere else in the room, lol. Last edited by MissUdy; Nov 18, 2020 at 04:56 AM.. |
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LonesomeTonight
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#6
It's normal to be tired. But falling asleep, snoring, not paying enough attention to the client is not only rude but unprofessional.
It clearly also reflects a lack of self-care on T's side. IF you are too tired to have a session, reschedule. Otherwise, the impact on clients is painful. |
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*Beth*, LonesomeTonight
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Always in This Twilight
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#7
Mine yawns on occasion (and he clearly tries to hide them), but has never seemed like he was falling asleep. (Hm, maybe that's related to his drinking coffee all day?) It would bother me if he seemed sleepy fairly often.
If it was a single session with your T, I'd chalk it up to maybe he slept poorly the night before or is under the weather. But if it's happened multiple times recently (or at least in the past 6 months), then it would bother me. I do wonder if it could be the time of the session, as mentioned above. I'd consider bringing it up to him. Regarding teletherapy, my T has said it's more difficult to focus in general, though he's gotten more used to it. So the teletherapy could play a role, too. |
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catches the flowers
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#8
She's yawned a few times over the years and always says, "I'm sorry, it's not you." I feel a little bit awkward, but really, she's human and people sometimes yawn.
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LonesomeTonight
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#9
Quote:
It almost sounds like he may be on a medication or a bit under the weather. I yawn a lot on certain medications or when my allergies are particularly bad (and have absolutely no control over it), and nodding off that easily could be related in some way. He may not even realize it is happening. My husband falls asleep sometimes in a matter of seconds in the middle of a conversation and has no idea that it has happened until I tell him. In his case it is a diabetes issue that they haven't quite gotten a handle on. It isn't generally about lack of self care or rudeness; it can be a medical condition and generally people don't even realize it is happening. Honestly, I might say something like, "I don't know if you are aware that you nodded of while we were speaking. Are you okay?" Because honestly, he may not realize it is happening, or he may not realize the yawning is as noticeable or distracting as it is. We so often assume people are being rude or that they are bored or something, but often there is more to the situation than that. |
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*Beth*, LonesomeTonight
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Always in This Twilight
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#10
Artley makes a good point--my college roommate would nod off randomly during conversations, and she ended up getting diagnosed with narcolepsy. Medications helped.
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*Beth*
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#11
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Magnate
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#12
Yes, that is a good point Artley. Having a medical condition or being under the weather is not something we can control.
However, I still think the onus ought to be on the T. In other words, being self-aware enough to know how this might impact a client. This is what they are trained for. Typically, yawning, nodding off or other such non-verbal communication cues are interpreted as disinterest. Here the OP sensed a lack of engagement from their T. Ts' actions and words do have an impact on clients and this is something Ts need to gauge and/or modulate. A simple acknowledgment (if they don't want to be too personal or disclose too much) would suffice - I've had a rough day... It's not you etc etc. But dozing and yawning on a client without acknowledging it can be damaging. Some clients might not want to comment on that, for various reasons. And again, the T is the one trained to attune to the client - not the other way around. |
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LonesomeTonight
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#13
Being present, aware and responsive are fundamental states for a therapist. If these states are so compromised by medication, illness or tiredness that they gave trouble staying awake, they are not well enough to be working and should take sick/rest leave.
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SlumberKitty
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