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#1
I was in an organization from 19-30 that I was sexually, mentally, emotionally and spiritually abused in. I won't name it I'm sorry bc it has a really good reputation.
I thought I would never get over the abuse bc most therapists just couldn't imagine the things that happened to me go on there. But they do. I did really hard trauma work on it a couple of years ago and I just felt worse afterwards. I consider the group I was in to be a cult and cult abuse is just really hard to get over. I'm 41 now and now there are a lot of blogs, fb pages, documentaries, etc exposing what goes on in this organization. I'm very happy about that. But for some reason recently I realized I finally feel free from it. I've done a lot of therapy on it. I've done what I could to warn others and will continue to warn ppl especially young, pretty, naive, vulnerable girls. But it's time for me to live MY LIFE!!! I don't obsess about it anymore. I don't need to read the latest article exposing it. I don't get triggered if I know someone on pc is in it. I feel such a freedom. Believe me if I was able to overcome something that I never thought I would you can too. I used a lot of grounding skills, dbt skills, therapy in general, family support, any support from ppl that knew the situation and I could trust. I called crisis lines many nights when I couldn't sleep. I fought hard, and you can too. I know you can. Cry all you need to. I used a lot of lavender aroma therapy. Put it on a cotton ball and laid it next to my pillow and cried. I survived, and now I'm going to THRIVE!!! You can too!! I know you can!! |
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Anonymous45390, DudeAlex, hermitbydestiny, KYWoman, may24, Moment acceptance, Out There, Ptsd1956, RainyDay107
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BoBoPeeps, Ceara1010, DudeAlex, Fuzzybear, Gus1234U, hermitbydestiny, KYWoman, may24, Moment acceptance, Ptsd1956, RainyDay107, ThisWayOut, vonmoxie
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#2
Hello rose1985: Thank you for sharing your success!
__________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex
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Gus1234U
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#3
Thank you for responding! Yeah I feel like I have a new life. But it wasn't easy. But I did it! Thanks for sharing in my new found freedom.
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DudeAlex, RainyDay107
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Gus1234U
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#4
Congratulations, and WELL DONE! i believe that PTSD CAN be overcome, with the will, determination, persistance and skills that you have shown~! thank you for confirming that for me ~ |
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex, KYWoman
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DudeAlex
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deus ex machina
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#5
Thank you for sharing this! So much of this kind of healing can be so gradual (I spent time in what may have been a very similar environment, for much less time but still I am not quite beyond its effects some years later), and it is most encouraging to hear that you have reached a place of freedom from it.
Congratulations! __________________ “We use our minds not to discover facts but to hide them. One of things the screen hides most effectively is the body, our own body, by which I mean, the ins and outs of it, its interiors. Like a veil thrown over the skin to secure its modesty, the screen partially removes from the mind the inner states of the body, those that constitute the flow of life as it wanders in the journey of each day.” — Antonio R. Damasio, “The Feeling of What Happens: Body and Emotion in the Making of Consciousness” (p.28) |
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex
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DudeAlex
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#6
Yeah I also didn't think I'd get over the abuse bc it was so much. Not just one thing but countless things. But I've realized that other ppl have been through similar situations and with lots of work were able to get over it. I'm bipolar and even went through a psychosis over it all in 2011. I had a flood of memories come up and had a total loss of touch with reality. I'm on aps now which sucks but every time I try to get off of them I get a really scared feeling. I was diagnosed with bipolar and PTSD in 2011 when I ended up in the hospital. I'm finally stable too. It all took a lot of patience and trial and error. Dbt distress tolerance skills helped the most I think oh and grounding techniques.
If I could do it, you can too. |
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DudeAlex, RainyDay107, vonmoxie
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DudeAlex, RainyDay107, vonmoxie
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#7
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex
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DudeAlex
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#8
Rose1985 I have been in the same boat before but I have overcome most of my PTSD. I still take Lavender Bubble Baths once and awhile. If you want to take a look at my post about panic attack and added anti reflective coating on my glasses.
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex, KYWoman
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DudeAlex
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#9
I am sincerely very happy for you! That's awesome.
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Anonymous41403
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#10
AWESOME! Thanks for sharing your story!
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex
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DudeAlex
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#11
Just an update. I'm still doing well. I still do look and see how it's going exposing the abuses occurring in this organization. But I'm not obsessed with it. Feels so good! I wish I could share more but like I said there's ppl on pc in it. Not saying they're abusing ppl but I'm sure they've seen some of it happen.
I'm no longer ruled by it. Feels great! I suffered so badly from ptsd that I quit driving. It's been 19 yrs but I'm 're learning driving again by taking lessons and soon I'm hoping to have my license. I have a little money and I'm gonna get a car! It's going to open up so much for me. I'm hoping to join the Unitarian Universalist church and do some activism through there. Start taking a Spanish class, join the y, meet some new ppl. I'm really excited. From the abuse I went through I really isolated myself. I do have one really good friend but I hope to make more. I'm ready. I'm ready to trust again. Thank you all for your support. |
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DudeAlex, KYWoman, Open Eyes, RainyDay107, ThisWayOut
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DudeAlex, RainyDay107, ThisWayOut
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#12
thank you (Y)
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex
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#13
OMG!!! IT IS SO GREAT!!! ROSE1985 You give me hope!! Thank you
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Anonymous41403, DudeAlex
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DudeAlex
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#14
Well I'm finally driving but I'm being triggered by all the sexual harassment/assault stories coming out. Also the place I was abused in is having stories written about them, by major newspapers. Yay! Finally! But it's triggering. I'm working with a new therapist. Idk if she'll be able to help, only have met with her twice. I wish all this stuff was easier to get over....
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DudeAlex, KYWoman
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#15
Yes! Another success story. I, too, have overcome in ways I thought unimaginable. Eight years of CBT, meds, meditation, empathy courses all gave me time to heal and re-tool. I'm no longer on meds (studies show SSRIs can regrow the brain's hippocampus after x-amount of years). No more nightmares, no more chemical dips: life is good enough finally.
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DudeAlex
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DudeAlex
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#16
Thank you for sharing your success! It gives me hope!
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DudeAlex
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#17
Quote:
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DudeAlex
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#18
Rose, I am glad you have made so much progress. I, too, was in a cult and suffered from it, although I was only emotionally and psychologically abused and repressed, not abused in any other ways. Nonetheless, it was a cult and it was difficult getting out, only having 3 friends who were not in that church, and starting over.
Now, I get support from multiple sources, including my counselor, my PDOC, my wife who I did not know then, my friends who all accept my non-religiousness, SMART Recovery, PsychCentral, Secular Buddhism (I am not a Buddhist, but I practice some of their techniques and I meditate daily now) and meeting new people. Recovery is awesome. I'm glad to be in it with you. __________________ "Do your best. That is all anyone can ask." ~me |
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Open Eyes
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#19
I just read your post from a few years ago. Good for you for not naming the cult. There are so many honest hearted ones in there that are truly decent Christians doing what they think is the Godly way. While I was an elder I was able to see the good and bad in people from circuit overseers to all those “worldly people”. 3 years ago I finally broke free of the mind control. I was abused as a child and had to sit in the hall suffering with cuts and bruises while my stepdad would comment and act so righteous. I witnessed hypocrisy on so many levels that eventually I got out.
What brought me here today is a result of age 2 to 59 of abuse trauma. I finally figured out I have PTSD from all of it. I can’t stay in relationships. If she gets emotional about anything and I go into flight and fright mode. I am searching for ways to overcome this afflicition.. I will try some of the things you found helpful. Thank you for your words of freedom and discretion.... |
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