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#21
Thank u for this post. I have a similar situation. I am married and inlove with my friend. Love my husband dearly but my friend is constantly on my mind.... Wont go away. I wait daily for him to message me.... And have the same stuck image in my head and how he makes me feel good. I wish i could make it all go away so that i can be true to my husband.... But i dont know how. Causes me to lose focus at work and interferes with my daily life... I just want it to stop
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angelicgoldfish05, hamster-bamster, SeekingPerspective
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angelicgoldfish05, elin95
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#22
I feel the same. It took me 11 years to completely get over my first boyfriend. When I finally meet a man who I feel like is a kindred spirit and what I have been searching for and they walk away without giving me closure, it is very hard. I get obsessed too.
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Anonymous200265, Lostdeepinspace
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elin95
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#23
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Alone & confused, angelicgoldfish05
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angelicgoldfish05, elin95
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#24
Wow thank you so much for all your honest answers.
@ stbguy wow our stories sounds so much alike! That must be really horrible that she treats you like that. I think that she just couldn't handle it and did not know how to react.. Have you ever talked to someone in your real life about this? @bebrave483 it's okay! it's great to tell your own story. Never expected that this was a problem that other people have too. now i'm so curious who this guy is haha! It's so hard not to feed it right? It hurts you but it also feels good.. tough stuff.. @wantwhaticanthave that must be really hard for you, especially because you have a husband too. it's really hard right? have you ever talked about this to someone in your real life? x @empresseugenie1982 hi! 11 years are a long time, must be really hard for you. but is it over now? so yes, that is really great! how did you do that? -- I think we should stop emailing each other. Because those emails are my life and it feeds the obsession. But then it feels like i lost her completely. And i love it so much to hear what's she's doing in life. but when I go on further this way, I'll be still obsessed when I am 80. I try to bring some positive thoughts out of the whole situation. There are so many million people in the world, and I'm one of the lucky few that had her in my life for a couple of years. If I made one different step in life, like going to another school, I wouldn't know that she even exists! I'm happy that she brought so much joy in my life. I'm sorry for my crappy english though, i'm tired and got just home from a long day of work |
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angelicgoldfish05
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angelicgoldfish05
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#25
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About the MH issues - sometimes there is one that can be identified as a root cause for all the rest, so it's worth finding out sometimes. Having Asperger's is what gave me depression, OCD, Avoidant PD and all the rest. Without that diagnosis, I would have 4 or 5 mental illnesses. Having the diagnosis of ASD kind of puts them all into perspective and shows you that it's actually one big one, and 4 little ones sprouting from it. |
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angelicgoldfish05
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angelicgoldfish05
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#26
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I was forced by my loved one to stop contacting her, by her ignoring me. I would also love to know what she is doing in her life, but I can't even because she doesn't want anything to do with me . That's the worst. It feels like I keep losing her again over and over every time I just think about her. I wish I had never told her I love her, because we would then still at least be chatting. But, I think she would've realized something eventually, if someone she hasn't seen in 5, 10 or 20 years still phones her regularly. Secrets are always bound to come out. You are so right. If it were not for her, I would never even have known I could feel actual love. Also, I didn't even know girls like her existed until I met her. I thought girls were all the same until she showed me otherwise. |
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angelicgoldfish05, elin95
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angelicgoldfish05
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#27
Yeah you are right we must be grateful that we met such amazing persons.
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angelicgoldfish05, Anonymous200265, Lostdeepinspace
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angelicgoldfish05
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#28
Feeling so low. Missed her a lot today.
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angelicgoldfish05, Lostdeepinspace
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angelicgoldfish05
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#29
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I have not spoken to anyone in my real life about this as everyone knows we are best friends and I feel that everyone would judge me because i am married. I have a feeling that my mom knows though.... I think she can see it. I have tried to let go .... but it just doesnt work that way. The heart wants what it wants. In my case.. why the hell does it have to be 2 people? |
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angelicgoldfish05, elin95
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angelicgoldfish05, elin95
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#30
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__________________ I'll always be invaded by you... |
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angelicgoldfish05, elin95
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angelicgoldfish05
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#31
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__________________ I'll always be invaded by you... |
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angelicgoldfish05, Anonymous200265
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angelicgoldfish05
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#32
Ok I messed up quoting you, but Elin95 you were curious who "my" guy is. I was going to post the latest video but then I remembered we're not allowed on this one so here is a picture from it, he sang in the song Imagine for Unicef. And here is his Wikipedia page His name is Bill Kaulitz and he's from the German band Tokio Hotel. He's so lovely oh Bill, why arent you mine? Lol as if.
__________________ I'll always be invaded by you... |
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angelicgoldfish05
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angelicgoldfish05
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#33
It would probably help to have no contact awhile. Like with a break up. And to make friends. Friends to share joy with and talk/laugh about the stress of life. What are your hobbies? Join a group or take classes that reflect your hobbies? Build a life that has nothing to do with her. After awhile you will find that you can go hours then days without thinking of her.
I had an unhealthy attachment to my ex and all this helped me. Aswell as traveling and realizing that there are So So many amazing beautiful people in the world. So many that obsessing over one is sort of silly. Because then I miss out on all of the other beautiful people and things out there.. It took awhile. It'll take awhile of distracting yourself and finding other interests. |
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angelicgoldfish05
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angelicgoldfish05
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#34
if I tell you to never think of purple flying monkeys EVER, what would you be thinking of all the time? if I tell you that if you ever catch yourself thinking of purple flying monkeys, you should call yourself an idiot, a pathetic loser, and an imbecile, would you be more or less likely to spend all your waking hours thinking of purple flying monkeys?
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angelicgoldfish05, elin95
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#35
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#36
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i don't think obsessing over a celeb is a symptom of schizophrenia.. it might be if you can't see the difference between real and fantasy anymore. but thats not the case right? you know he's a celeb and that you don't know him personal |
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#37
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angelicgoldfish05
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#38
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__________________ I'll always be invaded by you... |
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elin95
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#39
I used to like their oldschool songs like durch den monsun, spring nicht and so. But dont really like their new songs. I think tom is cute too. You can write them a letter?
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#40
You are certainly not alone in this, Elin. I would think you should stop feeding the obsession.
The best way to get past something is to become occupied with something else. Sports, exercise, drawing, writing, socializing - something interesting and time consuming. Of course, let it be something reasonable to your lifestyle/schedule. It really will help. Please don't hate yourself! You didn't do anything wrong, you are just hung up about someone. You will look back on this one day, and you'll be glad you got past it. If Therapy and Counseling don't work well for you, there are always steps you can take to make the changes you need to be happy: keep a journal, feel good about days that you don't contact the teacher, give yourself the benefit of the doubt, write down what things you have done that you do/don't like. Instead of dreading the future, keep in mind that the future is full of fresh starts - you deserve to be happy, and you'll eventually make enough changes in your life to be happy with yourself. |
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angelicgoldfish05, hamster-bamster
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