How to stop obsessing over someone. Please help me.

I'm sorry that happened stbguy. I know you won't believe it but she doesn't deserve you if she acted that way just because you had feelings for her. I haven't been tested for aspergers but I already have enough mental illness' without adding another one lol. I know it's not funny but I have to laugh or I'd cry. I think I have everything I read about anyway, the latest being histrionic personality disorder. It's scarily accurate description of me, but then so is everything else I read about.

Vossie42, interesting question. I guess I'm avoiding thinking about hurting myself. I did it for years (both self harm and starving) but I haven't done it once since I first saw this guy. I don't even know what it is about him, I mean I see lots of hot celebrities online, but I just get this warm fuzzy feeling inside when I see or think about him. It was love at first sight which never happens to me. He literally had the most beautiful smile in the world, it's the one thing everyone says about him, it was the second thing I ever said about him "I love him, his smile is beautlful" maybe I should stop, I could go on and on about how perfect he "seems" I put those quotation marks since I don't actually know him and of course he's gonna make himself seem perfect so he'll have fans buy the music. I'm not completely stupid either, I do know he has a public image which may not be how he is really. It's just nice to dream. And he does talk too much for my liking, I'd have a headache listening to him lol.

About not feeding it, yeah tonight I was at a show and still couldn't stop thinking of him. I kept picturing that smile, that damn smile that melts my heart. I don't know, I'm sorry for hijacking the thread going on about him. How are you doing elin95?

I'm sorry that happened stbguy. I know you won't believe it but she doesn't deserve you if she acted that way just because you had feelings for her.

I haven't been tested for aspergers but I already have enough mental illness' without adding another one.

@ stbguy wow our stories sounds so much alike!
That must be really horrible that she treats you like that. I think that she just couldn't handle it and did not know how to react.. Have you ever talked to someone in your real life about this?

I think we should stop emailing each other. Because those emails are my life and it feeds the obsession. But then it feels like i lost her completely. And i love it so much to hear what's she's doing in life. but when I go on further this way, I'll be still obsessed when I am 80.
I try to bring some positive thoughts out of the whole situation. There are so many million people in the world, and I'm one of the lucky few that had her in my life for a couple of years. If I made one different step in life, like going to another school, I wouldn't know that she even exists! I'm happy that she brought so much joy in my life.

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@wantwhaticanthave that must be really hard for you, especially because you have a husband too. it's really hard right? have you ever talked about this to someone in your real life?

That's the only way I can cope with my situation too, by rationally telling myself in a logical way that she can't be as perfect as I think she is, that she has flaws too. Many people tell me too that you can tell by the way she reacted to me that she probably has issues too. That's the only way for me to play it down for myself, is to say but I don't know her for real that well. I fell in love with the persona she had in the public eye, maybe she is horrible behind closed doors. It's just very hard to attach these negative qualities to someone you love though, because you don't want to believe it about them. It's like a father or mother struggling to accept their child is a criminal or serial killer or whatever. It doesn't fit with their image of the person they love.

About the MH issues - sometimes there is one that can be identified as a root cause for all the rest, so it's worth finding out sometimes. Having Asperger's is what gave me depression, OCD, Avoidant PD and all the rest. Without that diagnosis, I would have 4 or 5 mental illnesses. Having the diagnosis of ASD kind of puts them all into perspective and shows you that it's actually one big one, and 4 little ones sprouting from it.

Hey bebrave thank you so much for your honest answer. I did not know that there were more people who have this. Do you try to stop and feed the obsession? I try to do it right now. I am just so done with it and i just want it to be over.

It would probably help to have no contact awhile. Like with a break up. And to make friends. Friends to share joy with and talk/laugh about the stress of life. What are your hobbies? Join a group or take classes that reflect your hobbies? Build a life that has nothing to do with her. After awhile you will find that you can go hours then days without thinking of her.
I had an unhealthy attachment to my ex and all this helped me. Aswell as traveling and realizing that there are So So many amazing beautiful people in the world. So many that obsessing over one is sort of silly. Because then I miss out on all of the other beautiful people and things out there..
It took awhile. It'll take awhile of distracting yourself and finding other interests.

if I tell you to never think of purple flying monkeys EVER, what would you be thinking of all the time? if I tell you that if you ever catch yourself thinking of purple flying monkeys, you should call yourself an idiot, a pathetic loser, and an imbecile, would you be more or less likely to spend all your waking hours thinking of purple flying monkeys?

Ok I messed up quoting you, but Elin95 you were curious who "my" guy is. I was going to post the latest video but then I remembered we're not allowed on this one so here is a picture from it, he sang in the song Imagine for Unicef. And here is his Wikipedia page His name is Bill Kaulitz and he's from the German band Tokio Hotel. He's so lovely oh Bill, why arent you mine? Lol as if.

But I can read body language, and isn't that the main symptom of aspergers? I think the schizophrenia (which I denied for years) is the main cause of all mine, right down to the delusions about this guy. Even his fans don't like me, so why would he? I've stopped leaving him these stupid inappropriate comments I used to leave all the time.

hi thanks for answering! I know him, i have been to a concert of them in 2007. i was a big fan in 2005-2007 so. haha he's cute.

i don't think obsessing over a celeb is a symptom of schizophrenia.. it might be if you can't see the difference between real and fantasy anymore. but thats not the case right? you know he's a celeb and that you don't know him personal