What is love?

s4ndm4n2006 · Oct 26, 2016 at 10:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by campervanman

What's your opinion on `your first love adage` then s4ndm4n2006?

As I have and still do remember my first love, even though I was then married!

can you explain your question a bit more? what is my opinion of what aspect? Are you asking about the first time I actually loved someone or had a crush on them. Are you asking about the first time I was infatuated or was in a real relationship where I loved my partner?

Also a question - your first love was not your wife?

campervanman · Oct 26, 2016 at 10:46 AM

You have just answered it!

Also a question - your first love was not your wife?

Correct she was not my first love. (But I still loved her in a different way)

My first love was when I was 21 and she was 18 and 6mth baby girl (Emma) we had an argument over something trivial and we split up (Thinking for a few day`s) BUT her mother had other idea`s!
`Anyway` What am saying is I loved her then (No crush) And if she came to me now and asked me back (Even after all those years`) I would gladly say YES!

s4ndm4n2006 · Oct 26, 2016 at 12:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by campervanman

You have just answered it!

Also a question - your first love was not your wife?

Correct she was not my first love. (But I still loved her in a different way)

My first love was when I was 21 and she was 18 and 6mth baby girl (Emma) we had an argument over something trivial and we split up (Thinking for a few day`s) BUT her mother had other idea`s!
`Anyway` What am saying is I loved her then (No crush) And if she came to me now and asked me back (Even after all those years`) I would gladly say YES!

how did I answer it, when my reply was a series of attempts to get you to clarify the question?

Rainstoppedplay · Oct 26, 2016 at 01:50 PM

Love is a chemical reaction. No oxytocin no love.

Trippin2.0 · Oct 26, 2016 at 02:36 PM

Love is a verb!

Oct 26, 2016 at 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trippin2.0

Love is a verb!

Exactly!

s4ndm4n2006 · Oct 26, 2016 at 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trippin2.0

Love is a verb!

was what I was saying... in *too* many words bahahaha

snarkydaddy · Oct 26, 2016 at 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PumpkinPieHead

The best definition i ever heard is that love is when a perspn flaws just don't matter

I like that... I think I know what this means

snarkydaddy · Oct 26, 2016 at 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

can you explain your question a bit more? what is my opinion of what aspect? Are you asking about the first time I actually loved someone or had a crush on them. Are you asking about the first time I was infatuated or was in a real relationship where I loved my partner?

Also a question - your first love was not your wife?

I looking to understand what love is. meaning how do you express and receive it. I am not asking about specifically asking about eros. All though that to is a form of love.

for example showing love could be going to work every day, paying the bills and putting a roof over your families head. and may not demonstrative. It might be doing laundry and cooking food. I am open to any ideas on this.

thank you for your question

snarkydaddy · Oct 26, 2016 at 04:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trippin2.0

Love is a verb!

yes, and that verb, the action of that verb is where is gets complicated. which is why i am asking this.

s4ndm4n2006 · Oct 26, 2016 at 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by snarkydaddy

yes, and that verb, the action of that verb is where is gets complicated. which is why i am asking this.

yes it does. As each of us has a different way of expressing and showing love to another person, sometimes it matches what makes them feel loved, sometimes there is a mismatch. But yeah beyond just being a verb you cannot just say 'love" that or this person and everyone knows what it means.

What we typically do is give what we usually expect to receive or desire to. Sometimes it's not that way but a lot of the time it is. some people are encouragers, some are givers, others are caretakers, etc... each of us has a varied number of ways to give love to others

there isn't really a finite definition of it.

snarkydaddy · Oct 26, 2016 at 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

yes it does. As each of us has a different way of expressing and showing love to another person, sometimes it matches what makes them feel loved, sometimes there is a mismatch. But yeah beyond just being a verb you cannot just say 'love" that or this person and everyone knows what it means.

What we typically do is give what we usually expect to receive or desire to. Sometimes it's not that way but a lot of the time it is. some people are encouragers, some are givers, others are caretakers, etc... each of us has a varied number of ways to give love to others

there isn't really a finite definition of it.

Yes that is all very true... I am trying to put together a synergy. And not limit my perspective so I am open and flexible here. Both on the giving and receiving end. For example. knowing that someone is expressing love, even if it is not the way I would naturally think of it. Has meaning. It means yes they do love you.

parenthetical to this...for me I have a few issue with altrusim. meaning I may do something and expect nothing in return. That is not a problem. But when someone does something for me, I may not return it. which then causes me an unintended problem.

thank you.

TishaBuv · Oct 26, 2016 at 04:44 PM

I once heard someone say something I think says a lot, "What it takes to get your baby is what it takes to keep them."

leomama · Oct 28, 2016 at 12:30 PM

I think the bible answered that question, love is patient, kind, long suffering.

TishaBuv · Oct 28, 2016 at 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by leomama

I think the bible answered that question, love is patient, kind, long suffering.

I've got the long suffering part covered.

s4ndm4n2006 · Oct 28, 2016 at 01:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by leomama

I think the bible answered that question, love is patient, kind, long suffering.

Well in full:

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

SvanThor · Oct 28, 2016 at 01:40 PM

Love is seeing the good in someone no matter how much harm they have done to themselves.

s4ndm4n2006 · Oct 28, 2016 at 01:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SvanThor

Love is seeing the good in someone no matter how much harm they have done to themselves.

I would tend to agree but with different words. I would say it's seeing the value in someone whether at the time their behavior is good or not. Because at any point in our lives we can make mistakes, offend, do "bad" things but this is not the whole of our selves, and being able to love another person just as fallible as I am means accepting that we are all both good and bad at times but always valuable.

leomama · Oct 28, 2016 at 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SvanThor

Love is seeing the good in someone no matter how much harm they have done to themselves.

Or you? Does that also count?

Summerhex · Oct 28, 2016 at 07:24 PM

I would advise looking up the 5 love languages. It goes into how people like to give and receive affection and can be used as a piece to that puzzle

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Rainstoppedplay Member Member Since Oct 2016 Location: Anon Posts: 73 7 40 hugs given	Oct 26, 2016 at 01:50 PM #24 Love is a chemical reaction. No oxytocin no love.
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Trippin2.0 Legendary Member Since May 2010 Location: Cape Town South Africa Posts: 11,937 (SuperPoster!) 13 600 hugs given	Oct 26, 2016 at 02:36 PM #25 Love is a verb! __________________ DXD BP1, BPD & OCPD "The best way to make it through with hearts and wrists in tact, is to realise, two out of three aint bad" FOB...
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TishaBuv Legendary Member Since Dec 2014 Location: USA Posts: 10,192 (SuperPoster!) 9 1,872 hugs given	Oct 26, 2016 at 04:44 PM #33 I once heard someone say something I think says a lot, "What it takes to get your baby is what it takes to keep them." __________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T
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leomama Grand Magnate Member Since Feb 2014 Location: USA Posts: 4,703 10 172 hugs given	Oct 28, 2016 at 12:30 PM #34 I think the bible answered that question, love is patient, kind, long suffering.
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SvanThor Member Member Since Dec 2015 Location: Ohio, USA Posts: 432 8 57 hugs given	Oct 28, 2016 at 01:40 PM #37 Love is seeing the good in someone no matter how much harm they have done to themselves.
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Summerhex Junior Member Member Since Oct 2016 Location: Arizona Posts: 10 7	Oct 28, 2016 at 07:24 PM #40 I would advise looking up the 5 love languages. It goes into how people like to give and receive affection and can be used as a piece to that puzzle
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