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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: United States
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#1
I live alone and am socially isolated and unemployed. I have no family nearby and now not a single friend. I have become more and more isolated.
Have been trying to get help but so far just go deeper into a pit of despair. Now I feel I have entered a new weird territory where I don't have much of a personality. I have no idea how I am perceived by others. I think this is because when alone one doesn't really need a personality. I live in silence. Lately I find myself wondering why others talk so much. I have opinions about everything but don't see the need to talk about anything. I also think I am very irritable because I get really irritated by other people. Mostly people in authority. Like my primary care doctor and my apartment property manager. I just feel like people are always doing things and saying things that make no sense. __________________ |
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Anonymous32891, Anonymous43949, Anonymous445852, Anonymous50384, Fuzzybear, katydid777, MickeyCheeky, Open Eyes, TishaBuv, unaluna
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#2
Dechan isolating too much isn't a good thing
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katydid777, MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: United States
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#3
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Anonymous32891, katydid777, MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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Legendary
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#4
I'm so sorry you're struggling If it can help a little bit... we're here to listen. We care about you.
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katydid777
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mrsselig
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Grand Magnate
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#5
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Sweetie! There you are. You are the most loyal, ever-present member on Psych Central. You should get an Oscar like prize because you are truly a STAR. Really! You make me smile. Thank you. __________________ |
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Anonymous32891, katydid777, MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky, mrsselig, TishaBuv
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#6
It’s true, we never know how we are perceived by others in any circumstance. I’ve been surprised by this, too, thinking others think well of me and learning they don’t even think of me at all.
I’m sorry you are struggling like this. Not to tout any particular religion, but I have found an interesting website, powerofspeech.org There is a daily lesson about proper speech, and it’s true, very little is helpful and necessary to say. (I hope my comment here is helpful) __________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
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katydid777, MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: United States
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#7
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Yes, this was actually really helpful. It is helpful to consider that others aren't thinking about me at all. That would actually be my best case scenerio. I just don't want to come off as weird or eccentric. I am not a loud talker or too emotional but I worry I may have developed a flat affect. I'll check out that website. Thanks, you are also such a sweetie. I hope you are well. __________________ |
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katydid777, MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky, TishaBuv
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Magnate
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#8
D,D you have all of us! We may not be at your door step, but you can always come here, and be able to talk with people here! (((((((HUGS)))))))
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MickeyCheeky, mrsselig
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MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
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Location: United States
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#9
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You know, Psych Central just rocks. It is the very best mental health community. I have learned so much from the people here. Yeah, and been comforted. Thanks. It feels soooooooooo good to be understood and listened to without bias. __________________ |
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky, mrsselig
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#10
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__________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
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DechanDawa, MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2015
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#11
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My sister lived alone but she talked to herself constantly. She would also have long conversations with other people not present - like me! Personally I consider this an example of getting a bit weird. But my sister didn't care. She also talked to inanimate objects, like to the television or radio. I don't do any of this. I have started to laugh aloud if something is funny in a movie I am watching or something on the Internet. But even that feels weird. I NEVER cry when I am alone. You are right that being alone all the time creates boredom and the state of being lonely. __________________ |
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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#12
I can really relate to this. I have been alone for many years and I felt that I lost whatever personality I did have. Recent events have shown that I still have the same personality, just a much older version of it. I think I have definitely gotten a few weird quirks from the isolation but they are not too off-putting, I don't think.
As for how you are perceived, I don't think anyone knows most of the time. I don't think it is a big concern how one is perceived unless quirks scare people or can be damaging to yourself in some way. Most people are irritating, I think that is a universal feeling. __________________ MDD with Psychotic Features, Dysthymia, GAD, Cluster C personality traits - Not taking any meds
Last edited by qwerty68; Dec 02, 2018 at 11:05 PM.. |
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky, unaluna
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Grand Magnate
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Location: United States
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#13
Quote:
Okay. this is very helpful, too. I haven't gotten any bad reactions from others. On the contrary I will say, somewhat sheepishly, that, in general, people treat me very nicely. Maybe it is just all in my head and I am being paranoid. I can't really name any quirks I have. It is more a feeling of being somehow transparent or thin-skinned. Maybe a bit extra-sensitive. I do dress eccentrically, at times, but that's nothing new as I always have dressed creatively. Young people come up to me and compliment my style of dress all the time, which makes me feel weird, you know, because now I am older. But I am used to it, mostly, because that has happened to me my whole life. As far as people being irritating, thanks again for your comment! I am pretty stressed at this time so I have less patience for...say, bad drivers, and stuff like that. Three out of my four adult siblings are really irritating and get on my nerves and I am isolating from them. My only sister died a few years ago and I do miss her. All that's left are "the boys" and they always kind of got on my nerves. My sister was their Wendy. __________________ |
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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#14
I would take their compliments as sincere, especially if you get them a lot!
The extra sensitive part is definitely part of the isolation experience. I get all paranoid when I go out after being alone for a long while that people are thinking all sorts of bad things about me. I tend to talk to myself when I am alone and it is hard to remember not to do it in public. For your situation, you seem quite normal to me and you are obviously an interesting person. Interesting in a good way. __________________ MDD with Psychotic Features, Dysthymia, GAD, Cluster C personality traits - Not taking any meds
Last edited by qwerty68; Dec 02, 2018 at 11:24 PM.. |
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
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Location: United States
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#15
Quote:
Haha. Thanks. About dressing creatively. It is kind of a hook in that it just draws people in - but I don't do it for that reason at all. I just like expressing myself that way. I have no idea why people come up to me and comment...as I would never do that to a stranger. I am fairly shy. People talk out loud all the time these days because they are talking on their various devices. I am certain people probably think you are doing the same. Thanks for the comment about sensitivity. I do get paranoid about doing simple things now. This bothers me. I do feel anxious and paranoid...although absolutely nothing happens to me when I am out. When I take the bus invariably strangers will talk to me and if the bus is kind of empty the bus driver will start talking to me. Finally I will say that for years I took diazepam or valium for anxiety and for me these benzos were a lifesaver. When I switched insurance I was no longer prescribed this medication. Since then my anxiety has been really raw. I understand why they don't prescribe benzos frequently any more but in my case taking away this medication has kind of thrown me into hell. __________________ |
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MickeyCheeky, qwerty68
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MickeyCheeky
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#16
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I also talk to myself constantly like your sister. I also talk to bugs I find around the house (if I'm helping them to get outside - I'll tell it, it will be ok! etc! haha) I actually think when you're alone that's when YOU can really be yourself, without any pressure. You can do the things you like and are interested in, there's a lot more to a person than how they come across in public, sometimes it's just getting it out that's the problem! That's how I see it, anyway! We are all here and I'm glad you started this thread as I can totally relate to you. |
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: United States
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#17
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OMG you talk to bugs! That is just the cutest thing! When my sister was terminally ill she started hearing her flowers talk. She called me up one day and said, "That I talk to my flowers is nothing new. I have been doing that for years. But now they are answering me. Do you think they know I am dying?" Actually, I think all the drugs were making her loopy but I said, "Yeah, they know you. You spend all your time with them. You're the flower whisperer. And now they trust you enough to talk to you, too." That answer satisfied her completely. I am not as magical as my sister was. Or you, I think. __________________ |
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G lady, MickeyCheeky, unaluna
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MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
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Location: United States
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#18
When I am alone I feel like air.
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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#19
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky, unaluna
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Magnate
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#20
No one loses or lacks a personality. I just have to say this. Everyone whether isolated and alone or in crowds or groups of people everyday retain their own individual likes, dislikes, values and opinions on things regardless of whether there are others to see or hear these things from them.
I grant you that it feels that you lack the opportunity to express yourself but trust me you're not going to lose your uniqueness. It would be good to find others to be around at least a little but not to restore your personality, but for many other reasons. we benefit from being able to reflect on things to others and hear their thoughts and impressions of our own, relate or disagree with them on other things because it creates a better environment for growth and especially critical thinking on everything in our life. I hope that you are able to find a way not to be as isolated as you have been. There is a good chance that if you put yourself out there you'll find at least a few that can relate to you, even if a good majority of the masses are annoying |
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky, unaluna
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