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BrokenWing60
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Confused Oct 07, 2017 at 06:09 PM
  #1
How would you all feel if.. you have always been there and been involved in the lives of your now Adult children, who now have families. We have never had any quarrels... Their father & I would drop anything We're doing to help them out in any way.. Then when special occasions come up, they shrug us off, decline our invites... saying, like.. We want to spend a quiet supper together alone... or they invite other family over for the holiday for supper/events, and the only way we find out is when we are told they can't come to our house since they have other family invited over for supper.... but we could come too, if we want.... Feeling like we are second rated, insignificant in their lives....
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Default Oct 09, 2017 at 04:51 AM
  #2


I have no pearls of wisdom here, but I wanted to say that I'm really sorry that you're having to go through this!

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MickeyCheeky
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Default Oct 09, 2017 at 05:04 AM
  #3
I've been throught this, as well. I'm sorry
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Anonymous40643
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Default Oct 09, 2017 at 05:32 AM
  #4
I'm sorry, too... I know that as an adult, I started to decline my family's invites too and wanted to do my own thing many times when my family had gatherings. I don't really have any answers but wanted to offer my support. (((((Hugs)))))))
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Shazerac
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Default Oct 09, 2017 at 11:13 AM
  #5
I don't have any nuggets of wisdom either. Just wanted to give you a hug

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justafriend306
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Default Oct 09, 2017 at 03:47 PM
  #6
How utterly cruddy of them. How disrespectful, hurtful, and unthoughtful.

I've a few ideas. Get in there and make the invitations as early as possible. Put them on the spot; if they say they already have plans then tell them when the next holiday will be planned and that you expect them to attend. Put the ball in their court and ask them when they are available to celebrate the holiday in question. What a great opportunity to establish new traditions. Celebrate alternative days. for instance instead of Christmas have a Solstice dinner or Boxing Day luncheon.
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Sunflower123
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Default Oct 09, 2017 at 11:51 PM
  #7
Excellent advice. You could also bring this up to them and get to the bottom of it. Good luck and best wishes.
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magicalprince
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Default Oct 10, 2017 at 02:08 AM
  #8
Have you tried telling them this? (The title of the thread)

I would feel sad, like I deserved to be important just like anyone else.
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crystal blue
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Default Oct 10, 2017 at 02:21 AM
  #9
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrokenWing60 View Post
How would you all feel if.. you have always been there and been involved in the lives of your now Adult children, who now have families. We have never had any quarrels... Their father & I would drop anything We're doing to help them out in any way.. Then when special occasions come up, they shrug us off, decline our invites... saying, like.. We want to spend a quiet supper together alone... or they invite other family over for the holiday for supper/events, and the only way we find out is when we are told they can't come to our house since they have other family invited over for supper.... but we could come too, if we want.... Feeling like we are second rated, insignificant in their lives....
I am new to this group. I don't have any words of wisdom, but, I do know how you feel. My grown children, daughter 41 and son 36 have just pretty much wrote me out of their lives. I don't get to see my grand daughters at all. I hope things get better for you. I am sending you a hug.

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BrokenWing60
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Default Nov 16, 2019 at 02:11 PM
  #10
Thanks for all the support.. things are somewhat better.. But we’ll see what this Festive season brings😐
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