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Old 03-18-2018, 12:07 PM #11
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Default Re: getting unfriended

I wonder too. Is she a work colleague or were you her patient? If it is a doctor-patient relationship, she should have never accepted your friend request on FB to start with. So it should be goodbye and good riddance. Also, if she is your doctor, it is a good idea to find a new one, IMO.

If itís a work relationship, you have to keep in mind not everyone has a small FB circle of friends. There are people out there with hundreds of friends, most of whom I doubt they know, but many people do that on FB. So what might seem like an intimate friend request to one person may seem like no big deal to another.
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Old 03-18-2018, 12:43 PM #12
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Default Re: getting unfriended

Quote:
Originally Posted by cln1812 View Post
I wonder too. Is she a work colleague or were you her patient? If it is a doctor-patient relationship, she should have never accepted your friend request on FB to start with. So it should be goodbye and good riddance. Also, if she is your doctor, it is a good idea to find a new one, IMO.

If itís a work relationship, you have to keep in mind not everyone has a small FB circle of friends. There are people out there with hundreds of friends, most of whom I doubt they know, but many people do that on FB. So what might seem like an intimate friend request to one person may seem like no big deal to another.
Eh, Iím not totally convinced she was in the wrong. She accepted the request to tell him it was inappropriate, Iím assuming because of how FB messaging works where messages from people you donít know get filed away and you may not see them. Though, that was a little dumb of her; just donít accept the request. But some people, especially older, just donít know socially acceptable FB protocol. Still.

I worked with people in the rehab hospital (this was physical rehab like spinal cord injuries, etc) who accepted patient friend requests all the time. I was like, guys, that is sooooo inappropriate and unethical! They just thought I was a huge, cold, unfeeling jerk. I came from a background in the ER where you SO wouldnít do that and theyíre like ďThis is not the same place.Ē I guess I see the difference, but in my opinion, itís just a delineation which should be maintained.


Anyway, I donít know if she was the OPís doctor, Iím just rumbling.
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Old 03-18-2018, 06:11 PM #13
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Default Re: getting unfriended

Quote:
Originally Posted by graystreet View Post
Hold up, are you saying you are/weíre a patient of hers?
A family member
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Old 03-18-2018, 06:22 PM #14
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Default Re: getting unfriended

Quote:
Originally Posted by kreg View Post
A family member
I am super confused.

A) If she were a family member, why would she not want you on her FB (granted, I have had to unfriend several family members, but I don't understand as it doesn't seem there is animosity there).

B) Why, if she is a family member, is she declining because of professional obligations?

I feel like there is a large part of the story we are missing. Maybe it would help us if we knew it.
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Old 03-18-2018, 06:27 PM #15
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Default Re: getting unfriended

well xrap i hope this don't get out. She works at the hospital.not a relative. My wife was the patient. The hosp. worker not a doctor said it was inappropriate to be friends with a patient or any of their family. But I got mixed signals from her-not unfriending me from the git go for one. And I guess after all is said it don't matter.
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Old 03-18-2018, 08:51 PM #16
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Default Re: getting unfriended

Quote:
Originally Posted by scaredandconfused View Post
I too think it's weird that she accepted your request, then sent you the message, then unfriended you. It would be a lot easier on her part to just have not accepted your request in the first place.

You say her initial acceptance of your friend request "made your day". That is quite a strong reaction to have! Perhaps in other ways, you were unknowingly coming on too strong and that led to her setting some extra boundaries. Who knows?

But this sort of thing (friend acceptance, then being taken off the friend list) happens on Facebook all the time. Try not to dwell on it, just live your life and let her live hers.
I agree with you. Now that you mentioned "made your day:" ....quite a strong reaction. I read that as an overreaction. An FB experience with unfriending involved a couple For years I was friends with both spouses. Then no warning she unfriended me. Her husband & I are still friends. I was never flirty with him So that was not the issue. Still unsure why she unfriended me. Figure I'll never know. Oh well life goes on.
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Old 03-18-2018, 10:02 PM #17
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Default Re: getting unfriended

Quote:
Originally Posted by kreg View Post
well xrap i hope this don't get out. She works at the hospital.not a relative. My wife was the patient. The hosp. worker not a doctor said it was inappropriate to be friends with a patient or any of their family. But I got mixed signals from her-not unfriending me from the git go for one. And I guess after all is said it don't matter.
With all of the concern regarding this woman and her social media habits surrounding you, I'm very surprised to hear that you're married.

Yes, it is incredibly inappropriate for healthcare workers to "friend" patients. But, conversely, it is just as inappropriate for patients to "friend" healthcare workers. Who knows why she didn't unfriend you? But I doubt very much she was sending signals. If she were treating your wife, there are some pretty strict ethical boundaries in place for which she can be called onto the carpet, so to speak. At some healthcare facilities, we can lose our jobs for engaging with patients and their family members on social media.

OP, your story keeps changing. I still feel like there is something missing. To me, no offense, it's kind of disconcerting. Especially given that you have a wife who, it seems, was recently in the hospital.
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Old 03-19-2018, 12:20 PM #18
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Default Re: getting unfriended

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Originally Posted by kreg View Post
My invitation in this case was that she was showing some flirtyness towards me. So you don't know if you don't try and I sent her the FB invite.
So your wife was in the hospital and you thought of one of her health care workers was flirting with you? And you fb-friended her hoping it could lead to an affair? If I am understanding this correctly, maybe you should be focused on your wifeís recovery instead of on the women who are treating her. The health care worker was probably being friendly because she felt bad for you that your wife was in the hospital! My mom is currently in the hospital and when my dad visits, all of the nurses are really nice to himó because itís hard to have your wife in the hospital.
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Old 03-19-2018, 01:38 PM #19
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Default Re: getting unfriended

Quote:
Originally Posted by kreg View Post
Thing is for a few days she left me on her friends list-which made me wonder if she really in some way wanted to be friends. And who knows maybe her relationship was not doing well. Like why didn't she from the first just unfriend me? So I followed up with another message-nothing mean or unfriendly in any way. Then she unfriended me. Was I misinterpreting her actions or words?

She simply forgot to remove you at the time when you messaged her again she was reminded.


You're looking for answers to things that are not there. You barely know this person and she politely told you the reason you can't be friends. Move on.
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