[DapperChapper]

I haven't been on a date (or anything resembling one) for a while now (a year and a half, at least). As a result, I'm not used to hanging out with people in a "romantic setting". Possibly because of this, if I'm ever in a situation where I think I *might* like someone/there might be the potential for things to develop, I start panicking. Not externally/visibly, but internally. I start feeling very anxious, the situation makes me feel uneasy and I give myself headaches. I have no idea why exactly I feel like this, but some guesses are...

- Fear of rejection
- Fear of getting emotionally close to someone (and subsequently being left)
- Fear of being physically intimate with someone (it has been a while)

I suppose it could also be the case that, on some level, I feel that this other person isn't a good match for me (for whatever reason), but, if that's the case, why do I make myself feel so upset?

So, I'm not sure why I feel like this, whether this is normal and I don't know what I can do about this. Will I just feel like this every time I meet someone and think I might like them? How can I progress from this? Any thoughts?

[SorryShaped]

Normal feelings.
One way to get over it... Do it anyway. Fear is a normal anticipation that we all have. It's ok to have fear. It's not ok to let it rule you. Almost everyone is afraid of others they don't know. They're just as afraid of these things with you. Relax, smile, and explore the possibilities.

[DapperChapper]

Ok, thank you. I suppose it's good to hear that I'm not the only one.

I guess that the nervousness and unease could be explained away as normal feelings, but are the headaches normal too?

It sounds like anxiety. Visiting a therapist can do wonders if you haven't already. I also agree with the above that doing things anyways makes a big difference. Maybe try going on a no pressure date. Someone who interests You, but you don't have a strong attraction to? Just an idea. Good luck.

[DapperChapper]

Thank you for your responses again. I have already been to my doctor about another issue and have been referred to another clinic for therapy. However, I have also been told that it could be (literally) months before I get seen, so I've been trying to take steps to change this on my own as well.

Out of curiosity, if a "No Pressure Date" is going out with someone to whom you have no attraction, but with whom you get along, what's the difference between that and hanging out/meeting up with a friend? Surely it's exactly the same, except you might know your friend a little better.