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May 22, 2018 at 08:16 PM
#1
Guess what? Me and that guy I met on OkC are finally meeting! Tomorrow. It's the guy who I posted about who didn't text happy birthday to me a couple weeks ago. I think he's awesome and seems like a good guy. We have talked on the phone too!
My question is, when do I tell him I'm on disability? I want him to know. Mainly, so that if it's a deal breaker for him, we can get it over with, and maybe then be friends or go our separate ways. I have so far told him that I am able to not work right now, so I'm not working. And that I'm exploring my interests, and looking for a place to volunteer and work in the meantime. All true! He just doesn't know the mental health disability part. But I mean, this is just dating. But I actually find myself really liking him, and I think I want to be real. When do I tell him? |
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 Bill3
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May 22, 2018 at 08:53 PM
#2
I would honestly tell him on the first date. Otherwise, it will seem like you're misleading him. Honesty is the best policy, and if he's a good guy, he'll stick around!
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May 22, 2018 at 09:24 PM
#3
Quote:
 Who is this guy? He's awesome!
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| Anonymous40643, Bill3, mote.of.soul
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May 22, 2018 at 09:33 PM
#4
Great news. You deserve a good life. Take care.
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Human
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May 22, 2018 at 09:43 PM
#5
That's great that he is accepting. Everyone has "flaws" (although I don't think being on disability is a flaw. My new guy guessed about my scars on the first date, and so I was honest. He was totally okay with it. He also has some baggage so, like I said, no one is perfect.
Besides, you are very active and trying to improve yourself and grow. I think that shows through in your person. And also, I think it's about being independent and being able to take care of yourself. Which you are. I'm glad he was so cool about it. Seesaw __________________  What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
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| Anonymous50909
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May 23, 2018 at 06:01 AM
#6
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May 23, 2018 at 06:22 AM
#7
I always disclose my bipolar right away to potential partners, friends, etc. Even a handful of people at work know (I need to be careful due to being a teacher). It is part of who I am and I have no need to hide it or to make apologies for it. At this point in my life, I have no need for people who don't accept me for who I am...You did the right thing by being upfront and I am so happy it worked out for you!! Be grateful he is open minded just don't put him on a pedestal for it. Having tolerances of other's differences is how people are supposed to be.
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 Bill3
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May 23, 2018 at 08:14 AM
#8
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| MistressStayc
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May 23, 2018 at 09:06 AM
#9
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__________________ What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
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Legendary
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May 23, 2018 at 09:13 AM
#10
I think you should tell him relatively soon, when you feel like it's the most comfortable time. Just be honest if he asks you something.
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May 23, 2018 at 09:38 AM
#11
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May 23, 2018 at 08:15 PM
#12
Hi everyone. So we went out today
It was a really nice date! He was adorable and nice. Overall, it was a good date! He lives about 2 hrs away from me, so we met in the middle. We walked by the water, and got food. I enjoyed my time with him and we were together for about 4 hrs. I have no idea what it will turn into, or if it will be more, or just be friendship (though we did kiss today). But who doesn't like a good mystery? Lol. I don't mind not knowing.
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| Anonymous40643
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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