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SorryShaped
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 07:24 AM
  #1
Last night I had several drinks and told someone i was with with that I'm in love with someone else. I don't want a physical relationship with her because I'm no good. There's also a lot of distance geographically. It's an emotional love but I know it's really there. I can't bring myself to tell the person it's about on my own because she's in a relationship and, though mine didn't work out, I still respect that as a boundary.
Should I tell her? We've been having an emotional affair for months already
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 08:44 AM
  #2
So.... when you say you've been having an emotional affair, does that mean you have openly flirted and that it's clear she has feelings for you too? This is tricky since she is in a relationship and you don't want to confuse her or rock the boat. That relationship should run it's own course... you know what I mean? I would honestly back off and let her be. It's not very honorable to steal away someone else's gf, imho.
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 09:39 AM
  #3
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Originally Posted by golden_eve View Post
So.... when you say you've been having an emotional affair, does that mean you have openly flirted and that it's clear she has feelings for you too? This is tricky since she is in a relationship and you don't want to confuse her or rock the boat. That relationship should run it's own course... you know what I mean? I would honestly back off and let her be. It's not very honorable to steal away someone else's gf, imho.
GF no, they're married. We haven't discussed being together even, but the feelings are there or maybe I can't determine my own feelings. Dunno
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 09:54 AM
  #4
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GF no, they're married. We haven't discussed being together even, but the feelings are there or maybe I can't determine my own feelings. Dunno
Married women = wrong choice
Ex wife = wrong choice.

You have a lot to offer but you are looking for love/sex in all the wrong places.

Stop what you are doing and focus on getting mentally well. Choose a partner now and you will regret it later when you are stable.
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 10:12 AM
  #5
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GF no, they're married. We haven't discussed being together even, but the feelings are there or maybe I can't determine my own feelings. Dunno

I would leave them be. This is not a good thing to do at all.
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 11:38 AM
  #6
Yeah. I'll keep stomping my feelings down like always. It was my ex-wife that I told about the friend that I love. Don't worry, it's nobody in here
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 12:42 PM
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Yeah. I'll keep stomping my feelings down like always. It was my ex-wife that I told about the friend that I love. Don't worry, it's nobody in here

It's not really a matter of stomping down your feelings. It's a matter of availability... it wasn't realistic to start an emotional affair with a married woman or to allow yourself to develop feelings for someone who is taken already. Best to fall for single women and women who are available -- then you don't have to shove down your feelings.
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 01:07 PM
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Yeah. I'll keep stomping my feelings down like always. It was my ex-wife that I told about the friend that I love. Don't worry, it's nobody in here
What? You dont love me? lol Teasing.

Dont stomp your feelings down. Take them to your therapist. Work on you. You're worth it and you deserve a healthy relationship.
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 01:09 PM
  #9
When did you have time to fall in love again?

You just broke up with the woman that visited you from afar and was into drugs? Then before that you liked your neighbor? then hook up with abusive ex. Then this new married woman?

You seem to have very intense feelings very fast and don’t give yourself any time in between. Give yourself more time to heal in between please

Last edited by divine1966; Jun 30, 2018 at 02:28 PM..
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 01:09 PM
  #10
I think it's best to stay away from married women. Working on these feelings with a therapist is also a good idea.
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 04:04 PM
  #11
Is it REALLY an emotional affair betwern both of you or is it only a one sided emotional affair on your side? You seem to need this kind of thrill to keep yourself FEELING something with a female.

Becoming stable yourself is definitely adviseable no matter how lonely you may THINK you feel. That is no condition to have any kind of meaningful relationship in that could ever in the long run make you truly not lonely.

Under no uncertain terms.....leave a married woman alone!!!! Don't even go there & back off from any emotional affair you think you may be having with her.

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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 05:55 PM
  #12
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Is it REALLY an emotional affair betwern both of you or is it only a one sided emotional affair on your side? You seem to need this kind of thrill to keep yourself FEELING something with a female.

Becoming stable yourself is definitely adviseable no matter how lonely you may THINK you feel. That is no condition to have any kind of meaningful relationship in that could ever in the long run make you truly not lonely.

Under no uncertain terms.....leave a married woman alone!!!! Don't even go there & back off from any emotional affair you think you may be having with her.
100% agree. I don't need to repeat any of what you just said. It's probably only my side that feels like that. I am not stable and am in fact still very manic, if not more than before
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 06:30 PM
  #13
Are you seeing a pdoc that can adjust your meds to balance out the manic or do you like the feel so much you don't want it balanced?

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Default Jul 01, 2018 at 05:29 PM
  #14
My soonest possible appointment is the 10th. I do like the way it feels overall but I also think my Prozac at 20mg is too high for being in combo with zyprexa. I'm also trying to be hopeful that it will balance itself out and I'll adjust but it isn't so far. The mania eventually will subside one way or another. I drove a car yesterday with tunnel vision and did fine. I slept 10.5 hours last night too.
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