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DazedandConfused254
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DazedandConfused254 On hiatus from MSF, except for PMs
 
Member Since: Jul 2017
Location: Coahulia y Tejas
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 02:42 PM
  #1
Hey Guys,

I hope this doesn't come across as being crazy or repetitive since I have posted a thread on a similar topic last night, but I am in the process of cutting toxic people out of my life to focus on more healthy relationships.

I used to be a part of a church that I considered my primary group of friends, having made a few best friends and going on a couple of mission trips together in the process. After 2 years of being a part of this group, however, things took a turn for the worse because I blew a gasket trying to adhere to all of this church's beliefs and events that were hosted, occasionally I would be encouraged or commended for doing so, but most often I pretty much conformed to the crowd for the sake of conforming, without reward. If I did anything that was considered out of the norm, particularly hold differing beliefs from the rest of church, demonstrated vulnerability, or even just try to be myself, I would receive criticism or shunning, including on social media.

I still have several friends from this group who I think highly of; these friends I will keep on social media. Most of the others from this church I used to be a part of, even if I loved them before, I am considering unfollowing/unfriending, as I have not seen them or kept any reciprocal contact with most of them in almost a year. When I do, they either question my intentions for leaving that church or pretend they don't know me.

What should I do with the rest of these church-goers who aren't my besties, but I have not yet unfollowed on social media?
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Bill3
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Default Jun 30, 2018 at 03:07 PM
  #2
What are the pros and cons of unfollowing?

What are the pros and cons of leaving things as they are?
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DazedandConfused254
Member
DazedandConfused254 On hiatus from MSF, except for PMs
 
Member Since: Jul 2017
Location: Coahulia y Tejas
Posts: 391
5 yr Member
333 hugs
given
Default Jun 30, 2018 at 04:55 PM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bill3 View Post
What are the pros and cons of unfollowing?

What are the pros and cons of leaving things as they are?
Good and thought provoking question....

If I unfollowed the people in question, first and foremost that would clear up lighten up my news feed. Since a lot of my former friends come from a bad crowd, unfollowing them would get rid of all the people who I feel inadequate or negative feelings towards, thus helping me to move on from that part of life. I don’t know if I’m a HSP or not but I tend to connect any feelings that I have good or bad, with people based off experiences I’ve had with them.

If I left things as they are, I wouldn’t feel awkward at all about unfriending, since the possible resulting weird tension would be out of the situation. However, since most of those people either stopped talking to me already or moved away from my current city upon my graduation from college and making changes I’m not sure if it matters or not. But as I’ve said on the flip side I tend to develop deep feelings with people I connect with, and people who have contributed to my ongoing self image problems should not be involved in my life at all.
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Thanks for this!
Bill3
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