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sadipeterson
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Location: Las Cruces, New Mexico
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Frown Jul 02, 2018 at 10:25 PM
  #1
Hi, I am new in this forum and I just want to share my experience of being married. I am 32 years old and I'm married for 6 years. The first three years of our marriage was perfect, everything went well and we were given a cute little girl. I can say that we are complete and happy family. As time goes by, our marriage face difficulties just like other couples, we don't have time for each other, we easily fought for a small reason and we reached to the point that we harm each other. I know that this is not easy for us but we decided to go on separate ways. It's difficult for us especially because we have a baby but it's a mutual decision. It's a long-term process and we really need to let each other go for us to grow and gain our selves back. Currently, our divorce process is ongoing but we're on good terms right now. Is this the right thing to do? if so, can I ask anyone the legal and right process? Thank you for time-reading.
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Albatross2008
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Default Jul 03, 2018 at 03:52 PM
  #2
Welcome to PC.

Goodbyes suck. I could say a lot of inspirational things like you can't get to the other side of the pool if you don't let go of the side you're on, but that won't make it not suck.
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Skeezyks
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Smile Jul 03, 2018 at 07:09 PM
  #3
Hello sadi: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

I'm sorry to read that you & your spouse are divorcing. You asked about the "legal & right process." I'm not sure what you meant by that. But, as far as the legalities of divorce go, this is something that is going to be specific to the state within which you live. Each state has it's own laws. So I think this is something you would need to talk about with people in New Mexico if that is where you live... perhaps an attorney.

You also asked if this is the right thing to do. Here again, I don't think I can really tell you if it is the right thing to do. But what I can say is that, unless you are being emotionally, verbally, & / or physically abused, no matter what else happens in your life, I believe you will always regret this even if you know it was what needed to be done.

Here are links to some articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that offer some perspective with regard to divorce:

https://psychcentral.com/blog/are-yo...ourself/?all=1

https://psychcentral.com/blog/5-divo...-splitting-up/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/extremi...se-of-divorce/

https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhaust...ing-a-divorce/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/psych...ons-not-to-be/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/lettin...up-or-divorce/

I wish you & your family well...

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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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Default Jul 04, 2018 at 01:59 AM
  #4
Hi and welcome!

I think the fact that you're both on speaking terms is fantastic - especially because there is a baby involved. This is not always the case when couples divorce (me, being an example of someone who doesn't speak much to my ex-husband).

Do you have Legal Aid in New Mexico?
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