FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#1
Recently I went to a family gathering. A couple of new friends showed up. I was introduced to them and they looked at each other and said, "Oh, your names is B_____?" and chuckled. We know another "B_____" and that's it.
Later, we were playing card games over dessert, and my aunt said, "It's your turn, B_____" The new friends said, B_____....we can't get over the fact that your name is B_____" And I politely smiled and said, "Oh..." and then the game went on. It's not my fault that my name is B______, like I had a choice over that. Some people have negative association with certain names (like it was their ex's, etc.) but is that fair? |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous49426, MickeyCheeky, Open Eyes
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Magnate
Member Since Jul 2013
Location: United States
Posts: 2,741
10 365 hugs
given |
#2
No it is not your fault but you do have a chose. You can change your name if you do not like it. If my thing they call mother named me something stupid like Apple I would be changing that as soon as I could or call myself by an alias.
__________________ When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors. |
Reply With Quote |
MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Legendary
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 10,189
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,870 hugs
given |
#3
If I understand your post, It sounds like they were scoffing at your name because they don’t like some other person with your same name.
You ask, ‘is that fair?’ IDK, fair? When I was around 20, somebody with my same name became infamous in the news, and people would comment like that when they’d hear my same name. Once her notoriety died down, that stopped. __________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949, MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Magnate
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,285
5 117 hugs
given |
#4
Okay, I do have negative connotations with certain names. "Paul" is the first that comes to mind. I associate names with my youth, particularly when they come with difficult memories. The negative connotations are never humorous to me. They are usually difficult for me. How unfortunate that I ended up marrying a "Paul". I recall warning bells going off when I first met him complete with an ick, yuck reaction entirely on account of the name. I couldn't help it. I should have listened to my gut feeling and instinct. I am sorry to all the "Pauls" out there but I really haven't had the greatest of experiences with them. I have come to dread the name.
But! I also have positive connotations with names too; and, this happens far more frequently than the negative ones. For instance, there was a fellow named "Kim" I knew in my youth who I thought was amazing - and he treated me well too. I have grown to love the name for a male and every male "Kim" I have met since has been an awesome individual. Hearing the name always brightens my day. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949, MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#5
Were you feeling uncomfortable or anxious at the gathering? Could have clouded the way you felt about these 2 women. They seem rather silly and outgoing and sorta weird, lol, but in my view, it sounds like they meant no harm. It probably would have helped if they explained what type of person B is and what they think of her.
|
Reply With Quote |
MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
New Member
Member Since Mar 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 6
5 |
#6
That's pretty dumb to judge an unknown person by their name. Why people do it? :c
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#7
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous44076, Anonymous49426, MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Magnate
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: limbo
Posts: 2,052
9 183 hugs
given |
#8
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949, MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Member
Member Since Jun 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 185
6 |
#9
I was a kid and my nickname was BJ. lol.
I had to end that. __________________ Fate whispers to the warrior. A storm is coming. And the warrior whispers back? I am the storm. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949, MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#10
|
Reply With Quote |
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,372
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
given |
#11
How rude. Just rude. Who makes comments about other people’s names!
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949, MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Legendary
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
(SuperPoster!)
7 38.4k hugs
given |
#12
I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, ennie I agree with what all the others have already wisely said better than I ever could. You've been given some great advice on this thread. I'd suggest to follow it if you can. I'll try not to repeat it too much. I wouldn't take those comments too seriously if you can. It seems like they were just some silly comments. Of course it's not your fault if you have that name. Sometimes names can have a negative connotation to other people, or even positive. I don't think you can truly avoid that. As long as they don't straight up offend you for it, I'd suggest to just take it as a light joke. Nothing too serious. There's nothing wrong with your name. Of course, if you feel uncomfortable with it for your own personal reasons, you can always change it or use a nickname, like MoxieDoxie has already suggested. That's your decision. Either way, I wouldn't worry too much about it. That's just my opinion though. The final decisione is up to you. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, ennie
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949
|
Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006
(SuperPoster!)
5 192 hugs
given |
#13
That's ridiculous.
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#14
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949
|
Reply |
|