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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
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#41
Who cares how he was with his ex. He is a bad boyfriend to you. So that’s what matters. Plus I bet if you talked to his ex she’d have some stories to tell.
You only dated few months. Not long term. No need to agonize over him. You can do better |
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#42
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#43
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OF COURSE THE PROOF IS IN HIS ACTIONS 100%! When you're ready, you'll leave that relationship. Right now, it doesn't seem like you want to give up on him yet. I can understand the pull to stay. I did. I paid for it with 2 years of my life wasted on a man who never loved me like he said he did; who LIED about being faithful (he was sleeping with another woman the entire time he was with me), and when I caught his lies on his cellphone (texts between him and the other woman) instead of owning up to his lies and deceit, he tried to keep the focus off himself by focusing on how my snooping was a violation of his privacy. My belief is: if I'm in a relationship with you, I have 100% access to your cellphone anytime I want it (and you have access to mine) because there is transparency and nothing to hide. I also dated alcoholics. They were all nasty trainwrecks. Draw a line in the sand. What is enough to make you leave him? |
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Location: USA
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#44
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#45
Well breaking away from a toxic source is never fun. But when you realize there are eligible, healthy, normal, reciprocative, respectful single men just waiting to date you rather than this messed up guy, you need to decide if it's a risk you're willing to take. Otherwise, stay stuck with this dead end, whatchamacallit b/c its sure not what a relationship is supposed to look like. Nope. He doesn't want to get help. He wants to be miserable. He wants to make you miserable. He will use you as his closest emotional abuse target, in person, on the cellphone, on the computer only as long as you allow it. Once you prioritize yourself and really see that you are better than he is, you'll find the strength to leave and won't let him reel you back in because you know there's better men out there. The world is gigantic. Is he worth any more time wasted? Your time is valuable. Are you?
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Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
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#46
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#47
So, when you're ready, you'll walk away. You're not ready yet. That's ok. Why does it matter to you still, what his therapist is or isn't doing for him?
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
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#48
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Which means that it's a great time to start working on re-building your self-esteem again. You have the power to walk away from this relationship, you have the power to say "no" to what is not good for you, and you have the power to not allow him to push your buttons anymore. Once you realize this and truly feel it within every fiber of your being, you will feel extremely empowered. Your self-respect and self-esteem will grow and soar. You owe it to yourself to feel good in life, and to feel good about yourself. You're worth it!!! __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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#49
This relationship has definitely ran it’s course...I have tried to be patient with him but he’s truly undeserving of my attention.
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Have Hope
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Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 264
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#50
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
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#51
Good for you. Stay strong
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Member Since Jan 2015
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#52
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Anonymous48672, divine1966, Have Hope
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divine1966
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#53
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#54
I believe you, he is not healed enough to be in another relationship which is what you are ending up suffering from. The fact that he is self medicating with the alcohol doesn't help either. There is just no way that you can experience a healthy relationship with a person who is struggling that badly.
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#55
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