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Eva85
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Member Since: May 2019
Location: Italy
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Default May 16, 2019 at 04:47 PM
  #1
I am shocked. How could I not realize? He was always busy (finding more interesting things to do), he was sending me pics of him bare-chested in front of the mirror (vane and insecure), I would always be the one chasing him to see him and he would never speak honestly and about his feelings.

How could I not see it? How could I be so naive? I made this illusion up in my own mind and didn't want to think it wasn't true. I did all by myself. I was the prisoner of my own mind.

I need to find the way to be able to see this next time I go out with someone. I need to be able to find the signs that show me that he is distant and too much into himself to see ME. I am giving too much and they take too much without any exchange.

Why do I attract these people? What do I need to change? I am begging for attention and love without realizing. I need to listen to myself better.

I remember when I was on hols and I received the 1st picture of him half naked in front of the mirror. I thought he missed me and was jelous because I was with another guy (a friend). But no, he sent me the pic because he's as insecure AF and needed my attention. I felt weird, as I didn't like it, but went along with it and played the game. He kept sending me pics, and the more he sent the more I felt weird.

When we were sleeping together I could never sleep properly relaxed with a deep sleep. I would always wake up hundred times and feel anxious. I didn't understand why. I thought I was excited to see him. It was my body and mind telling me to run away, but I didn't, I didn't get it.

I thoguht this was the ideal situation and I was just being stressed from family and work. I should have listened more carefully.

How can I listen to myself more carefully and pick up the signs my own subconscious is trying to hint me with?
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Default May 17, 2019 at 06:42 PM
  #2
Hi Eva85, welcome to PC. The positive thing about what you posted is that you have seen this guy is strange. People are going to continue to shock and surprise you during your life. We all pretty much learn as we live and interact with other people we come across. I think you have an idea of how you WANT to be "in love" and find a partner, but that doesn't mean someone that catches your eye is going to be the right match for you. Often beauty is ONLY skin deep too. And as you experience life you are definitely going to notice that reality. There are a lot of superficial people out there in our world of humanity.
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Luckystar03
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Default May 28, 2019 at 06:26 PM
  #3
I am in the same boat. Demanding attention from others when I should be 100% focused on myself 24/7 (because deep deep down I know that’s all that can fix my brokenness). I let others push me around, I get my hopes up, I destroy every relationship I feel like I could’ve had a chance at. It’s like I ruin it on purpose, and maybe I do because subconsciously, I know that I shouldn’t be focusing on cute boys instead of myself. So my advice to you is to realize that your subconscious is smart, and tells you what you need. Listen to it, and take it with a grain of salt because your mind can lead you into thinking things that are not real, like believing that a relationship with person X could be perfect if A B and C happens... You are not in total control of the future, but your subconscious is a guide that can direct you in one way or another. I was in a relationship that I subconsciously knew wasn’t going to last, but I wanted to keep it going so badly. BECAUSE, he made me feel some type of way. Good/bad/neutral he made me feel something. I craved his attention,
Possible trigger:
I got over it in a couple weeks and still went back to him. Maybe you just have to accept that you’re going to go against what your subconscious is telling you, but just realize that it is honest and intelligent so you should give more validity to your inner emotions. There aren’t words to explain the difficulty of letting people or ideas go, but if you succeed in your hardest challenges, you are winning. Listening to your subconscious like a best friend could make you strong as hell, if you just do it. It is dirty work, and painful, but if you do it, you will have so much self confidence. If you fail to listen to what your subconscious knows, it’s like proceeding to drive down a dead end even though you clearly saw the sign that says DEAD END. Like what’s the point? Just to see if it’s really a dead end???? Avoid the pain by BELIEVING your subconscious when it sends you red flags. Give it some validity. Just because it’s “imaginary” doesn’t mean it isn’t real. It’s very real. Like Beyoncé says, real things can’t be broken. It will always be there for you. Utilize it! And most of all, trust what your subconscious is telling you, even if it’s just a settle feeling that your mind will push you to avoid. You won’t get a clear dead end sign which is super annoying, but trust your guts, they know what’s good for you. You have billions of cells that work and die for you to be the best that you can be, follow their lead with your mind. Your subconscious always gets straight A’s at the end of the day (most of the time). It’s better to trust them than to find yourself at a dead end remembering those settle emotions... You got a road to follow which will TAKE YOU WHERE YOU NEED TO BE and unfortunately there are thousands of dead ends. Realize that it is MOST EFFICIENT to listen and give full validity to those settle emotions. They will keep you on the path you’re supposed to be on. Theres a reason you feel your subconscious butting into your mind, it tries over and over again to keep you safe. Don’t follow what you want in the moment, follow what you need in the future. Set long term goals, and achieve them over time, you’ll see that your subconscious is worth trusting

Last edited by bluekoi; May 28, 2019 at 10:12 PM.. Reason: Add trigger code.
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