FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Magnate
Member Since Aug 2017
Location: earth
Posts: 2,063
6 1,598 hugs
given |
#1
I've been wasting my time on online dating apps, specifically okcupid. It is just me but men are really eager to meet right away in person. They give me their phone number or say they want to meet in my town. I'm flattered but am concerned about the safety of such a situation. So far, I've been ignoring requests or trying to gauge them for their true intentions. I believe, half of them want sex although I state I am seeking friends. I met people in Asia through another paid dating app. But, here in the states, it seems to be free for all. I hear on the news about people meeting strangers and getting raped near my hometown. Thus, I'm just playing by ear meaning I'm trying to be cautious. I don't think it is wise to meet strangers from a free dating app in my hometown. So, I will just wrap it up and call it a day. I think online dating is not safe here where I live. It is unfortunate but this is reality.
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949, Anonymous44076, MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
ɘvlovƎ
Member Since Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 18,569
(SuperPoster!)
10 12.6k hugs
given |
#2
I understand your concerns. Maybe go with your gut.
As a side. I met my partner through eHarmony. We met in a very public place - a cafe - that was at a cafe in the suburb next to where I live. Our follow up dates were in public places too. A walk on the beach, watching movies etc. It was quite a while before my partner came to may place. You state that you're seeking friends. Are you on a dating app to find friends? Or do you mean that you'd like to be friends first with someone / get to know them better before dating them? |
Reply With Quote |
MickeyCheeky
|
MickeyCheeky
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#3
Hello bpforever1. You can use logic and good judgment to keep yourself safe. Meet in a safe public place for dates. Do not accept rides from a new date. Don't go to their home and don't bring them to yours. Don't tell them your specific work or home locations. Limit your alcohol if you drink and make sure that it is served directly to you from the staff and not handed to you from your date.
I dated on and off via Match for 3 years. I did not have any bad experiences....just dates that didn't work out. I've heard good things from others about Match and EHarmony except that Eharmony does not allow separated folks or gay folks. Just a heads up. I've heard that there are apps designed more for casual sex rather than dating. I think Tinder is like that but I don't know. The only one I used was Match. And of course an app designed for consenting adults to meet and have casual sex is very different from predators raping women. What do you mean by dating not being safe in your area? Are you living in a war zone or a turbulent ghetto? |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous43949
|
AspiringAuthor
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#4
Quote:
a). Ride in his car b). Come over to his place (even during the day) Unless and until you feel completely safe with that person. |
|
Reply With Quote |
Magnate
Member Since Aug 2017
Location: earth
Posts: 2,063
6 1,598 hugs
given |
#5
I got off the dating app. I really had no intention of meeting anybody. I just wanted to chat with others. I know this is not nice so I got off and hope to stay away from the dating apps. I dated a while back may be about 4 years ago. I met some people and did not like anybody near my hometown. I did communicate with one nice man but he seemed more interested in what I have and not me. So, I think it is best for me to stay away from these sites. I am really not in the position to date now. I am still recovering from my psychotic break and have no money nor transportation. I don't think it is wise to bother others when their intentions are entirely different from mine. I should not have bothered to write this thread but realized afterwards that I just wanted to chat with others.
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous44076, AspiringAuthor
|
Legendary
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760
(SuperPoster!)
6 10.6k hugs
given |
#6
I had the same issue with okCupid. I really just wanted to meet friends, but that is not the purpose of the site.
I did make the mistake of meeting guys too soon and doing things I didn't really want to do. Eventually I came to the same conclusion as you, that it is better for me not to date. Honestly, people on these sites are looking for casual sex or a serious relationship. I don't want either. So I'm not going to waste anyone's time anymore. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous44076, AspiringAuthor
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#7
Quote:
I wish you healing energy while you continue to recover from your break |
|
Reply With Quote |
AspiringAuthor
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12 12.7k hugs
given |
#8
Do you have meet ups in your area? That would be a good way to safely meet other people. Or volunteer at a animal shelter or food bank etc.
__________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
Reply With Quote |
AspiringAuthor
|
Junior Member
Member Since Jun 2019
Location: NY
Posts: 12
4 |
#9
I don't like online dating
there are a lot of freaks |
Reply With Quote |
Reply |
|