Father in laws girlfriend

My father and law has been dating this woman for about ten years. He seems happy with her but my husband and I hate her. She can be very criticizing, nosey and sometimes just downright rude and obnoxious especially towards me and my husband. She treats my husband and I like we are five (we both have Aspergers and she knows this). One Christmas a few years ago she blasted me for a birthday present I got my nephew (she didn't like it and told me it was too advanced.....I never heard anything from nephew's mom) and screamed at my husband for heny tossing a present that wasn't breakable to a cousin of his. She insulted my job by yelling like a child "Eeewwww, gross!!! Change the subject!"I work in a hospital and while I do try and keep the stories PG rated I was just stunned by her attitude. My husband and I figured since we deal with her at holidays mostly we would grin and bear it. However it is getting worse. She let off on my husband for drinking too much soda in his own house and recent he came home from his nephew's graduation livid at her. She went off on him for not planning ahead or getting tickets for the event or something like that. My husband had actually called his sister a few times before to confirm the date and he did make it on time. Then she was asking him questions about who went to the movies with him as a family member couldn't make it on Facebook. That was the last straw. He finally told his dad that he is not putting up with this behavior from her anymore. I am proud of him but a bit worried that his dad may choose her side over his sons. I have told my husband that he did the right thing but I'm worried that his dad and the gf will be mad at us for telling on her. We don't expect his dad to dump this woman we just want to make it clear that we don't like her behavior and that we will not pit up with it anymore. Any advice to following through or standing our grounds would be wonderful. Thanks.

I hope your FIL will stick up for you guys. I asked my cousin to help me with his mother. Sure enough, at the next funeral, she kept asking me why my brother wasnt there. Finally my cousin said to her, "She said she called him! Thats all she can do!" Then she shut up. But it happens every time. She acts like shes paying special attention to you, but really she is picking on you and making you uncomfortable. Putting you on the spot. Its very rude. Get away if you can! My aunt usually waits until she has me trapped in a seat or has grabbed me by the arm.

I am glad your husband said something. But since you cant control what your FIL does I think you both should come up with a plan for what you can do if she keeps it up or confronts you. I think having boundaries is a good idea and sometimes you have to set them like : " i Do not need your advice or opinion on this" " Thank you for your concern but this situation does not have anything to do with you." " I need you to respect my boundaries or we will have to leave" Once you have set or stated your boundaries then you have to hold your end up. You will have to leave or pull back if she continues to violate them. You have to set them with the FIL as well and maintain them.

I'm so sorry you and your husband have to put up with such TERRIBLE behavior, Foo Fighter! I COMPLETELY AGREE with you that your husband did the right thing by calling her up on her behavior! As for what to do from here, I COMPLETELY AGREE with what unaluna and sarahsweets have already wisely said better than I ever could! DEFINITELY set up boundaries with her! You have EVERY RIGHT to be respected and to NOT be treated like this! Hopefully your father in law will understand this and will side with you and your husband! Keep us updated on your situation, ok? YOU DESERVE TO BE RESPECTED! You're certainly LOVED AND RESPECTED HERE! THAT'S A PROMISE! I hope things will get better soon for you one way or another! Please stay safe and take GREAT care of yourself! WISH YOU THE BEST OF LUCK TO BOTH YOU AND YORU HUSBAND! Sending many AWESOME, kind, safe, sweet, warm, wise and WONDERFUL HUGS TO YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND, FOO FIGHTER, JUST LIKE YOU BOTH ARE! I HOPE YOU'LL BOTH BELIEVE THAT! THAT'S TRUE! THAT'S ABSOLUTELY TRUE!

Quick update. She was ripping on my husband on Facebook again and we took a break from her on Facebook. Final warning. One more instance and we are blocking her on Facebook. I also told my husband he has the authority to tell her to bug off and that he needs to talk to his dad again about this. But we started to push back.....It's liberating!

Foofighter. I like what Saragsweets and Unaluna suggested e to set boundaries and to stick them no matter what. Spend as little time with her as possible. She sounds like a low class *****. Glad you're blocking her on Facebook. She sounds like a truly horrible woman. I feel sorry for you and your husband. BTW Love your username. Dave Grohl and the Foofighters are one of my favorite rock bands.

Thanks!!! It's a big step for us. And yes she is a class act. She is only liked by FIL, everyone else including my family hates her or finds her annoying. My husband also deleted the comment and we fixed the break so she can't see us. It's nice. And so is the Foo. I love the Foo Fighters!!!