Long Distance Relationship

Firstly he's in the military and is deployed in South Korea.
I go to college in Maryland U.S.A and the time difference is 13 hours.
We have been on and off for 4 months, having petty arguments.
First it was he wanted to focus on himself, 2 weeks later he contacts me again. Then afterwards we fought 3 more times, first time was that I was annoying, then it was I thought I ouldn't do it anymore, and third time a photoshoot and that I thought I was doing all the effort. And he thought he was being smothered.
I fell in love with him the first time I saw him, and he really likes me but we don't know to do a long distance relationship. We have both never done it before, and I think thought it would be easy but it isn't. We also have very busy schedules, and have a hard time figure out when to FT.

After we broke up I asked him if he wanted a relationship, and he said he wanted to go with the flow... I can't do that. I've always been a planner. So that's when I decided to focus on school and get into the rhythm of my schedule.

I decided to do the no contact thing, and I don't know if that is going to work or even help. Each day it makes me sad to not text him. I want to share the cool things or happy moments I experienced, but I haven't. I have a lot of pride, and I just don't know what to do. I was wondering if you could help me....I could really use it. I'm so lost, and in a lot of pain. 😢

Thank you,
Life777

Hello Life777: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central.

To be honest I'm not sure I know what it is you hoped to get help with... long distance relationships or the sadness you're feeling having gone no contact. From what you wrote it sounds as though your relationship with this gentleman is over. So perhaps learning how to navigate long distance relationships is too late. You wrote you're lost & in a lot of pain. So I presume perhaps it's the sadness you feel that you hope for help with. Here are links to 7 articles, from Psych Central's archives, on the subjects of what to do when you feel lost, how to move past regret, & on healing from heartbreak:

When You Feel Lost

Feeling Lost in Life: A Learning Opportunity

A Powerful Exercise for Moving Past Regret

10 Tips to Mend a Broken Heart

Help on Healing from Heartbreak

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/imper...tional-wounds/

https://pro.psychcentral.com/recover...rom-rejection/

And then, just in case your relationship with this gentleman is not over, here are links to 4 articles on long distance relationships:

https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-cha...onships/?all=1

https://psychcentral.com/lib/7-tips-...tance-couples/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/solve-...ship-problems/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/heali...at-a-distance/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

How long ago did you go no contact?

I think if you were fighting that much and not seeing each other it would be worse if you were together. I think you did the right thing.