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Newly Joined
Member Since Nov 2019
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1
4 |
Nov 14, 2019 at 03:28 PM
#1
My fiancé and I have been together for about a year. He seems to have issues with my past relationships and trying to compare himself to them. Constantly asking if I have ever felt how I feel about him now about anyone else. He doesn’t like when I have casual conversations about my past. If a story gets told about my past he relates it to when I was married prior or dating someone prior. He has been married before as have I, we both have kids. I try to make him feel reassured but this continues to come up. I don’t know how to help him to just realize everyone has a past and it is just that. . A past. That it doesn’t matter now and it can not be changed. Any advise ?
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 astoldbyginger, Bill3, Buffy01
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 astoldbyginger, Bill3, Buffy01
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Legendary
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,924
15 24.1k hugs
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Nov 14, 2019 at 10:55 PM
#2
You want to change a significant part of who he is.
It sounds like a big ask. Unless he is willing to go consistently to therapy, my advice is to assume that he is going to continue to act as he does now. To what extent is that a dealbreaker for you? |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,514
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Nov 15, 2019 at 06:07 AM
#3
Quote:
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Member
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Z
Posts: 110
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Nov 16, 2019 at 09:33 AM
#4
Out of curiosity, do you know of any past relationships of his, romantic or otherwise, where he was compared to others and made to feel inadequate?
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
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