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astoldbyginger
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astoldbyginger Is trying to keep it all together, but actually really needs a rest.
 
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Default Nov 17, 2019 at 11:30 AM
  #21
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Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
I had ex’s who also said those encouraging affirmations, led me to think they just weren’t ready (we were young), but they were not really in love nor serious about me. Maybe they really believed their own BS, I sure did.

Believe what people do and not what they say. Yes, small betrayals are a big deal IMHO.
Actions over words! Very true. Thanks for your input TishaBuv
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divine1966
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Default Nov 17, 2019 at 11:56 AM
  #22
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Originally Posted by astoldbyginger View Post
This hit me hard. Hahaha. OMG. But I guess this is what I need to hear . I went to therapy for the first time last month and will bring this up in my next session. Thank you.


It comes down to things that he has said, not things I perceived as signs. He says he loves me, he brings up marriage on his own. But I have not taken it seriously because I knew I had to assess things before even getting into a relationship with him. When it comes to him and his friends going places with the girl, I did not find this out until about 4 days ago. Since then I have decided this won't work for me.

There are other aspects to our relationship, his friends, this girl, and the situation in general that I have not mentioned here because I would then have pages of posts. Things are not always black and white which is why people tend to stay in things that are not healthy. But I have taken the main, troubling facts out to assess them and get honest feedback. I definitely do not want to be one of those people hanging onto a toxic relationship or consistently getting into them. I agree with bringing it up in therapy
Good for you making wise choices!!!
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