[Possible trigger warning (emotional/psychological abuse)] help me, please

RedBanana · 09:38 PM

So, I’m friends with this guy and he keeps telling people that I’m his girlfriend, when I’m not, and so whenever someone brings up “What would you do if Molly broke up with you?” he always says the same thing

Possible trigger:

“I would kill myself”,

but I’ve been told he only says that when I’m there, otherwise he tells them that he would cry for days (apparently). He quite often won’t listen to what I have to say and the quote ‘Other people have the right to express their incorrect opinions’ sums him up quite well, I’m scared to ‘break up’ with him because I don’t want to deal with the drama of everyone asking me why and I have a lot of people who want to be my friend and they would batter him, he would stand no chance. What he does is definitely catagorized as abuse, but I’m too scared to talk to him about it. we have both been diagnosed with autism or ASD but he insists that because he is a boy he has worse autism than me, I have frequent shutdowns in school and I’ve never seen him stim ever and

Possible trigger:

he claims that it’s because I look like a freak when I bounce up and down repeatedly or flap my arms, apparently I’m just a weird, fat, retarded freak to him, I he does not hesitate to tell me that.

I just need help leaving..

TishaBuv · Feb 29, 2020 at 12:12 AM

Hello RedBanana, and welcome to PC!

This sounds like a very uncomfortable and difficult situation. Do you have someone you can talk to who can help? Parents? School counselor?

Cardooney · Feb 29, 2020 at 02:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedBanana

So, I’m friends with this guy and he keeps telling people that I’m his girlfriend, when I’m not, and so whenever someone brings up “What would you do if Molly broke up with you?” he always says the same thing

Possible trigger:

“I would kill myself”,

but I’ve been told he only says that when I’m there, otherwise he tells them that he would cry for days (apparently). He quite often won’t listen to what I have to say and the quote ‘Other people have the right to express their incorrect opinions’ sums him up quite well, I’m scared to ‘break up’ with him because I don’t want to deal with the drama of everyone asking me why and I have a lot of people who want to be my friend and they would batter him, he would stand no chance. What he does is definitely catagorized as abuse, but I’m too scared to talk to him about it. we have both been diagnosed with autism or ASD but he insists that because he is a boy he has worse autism than me, I have frequent shutdowns in school and I’ve never seen him stim ever and

Possible trigger:

he claims that it’s because I look like a freak when I bounce up and down repeatedly or flap my arms, apparently I’m just a weird, fat, retarded freak to him, I he does not hesitate to tell me that.

I just need help leaving..

Hello. Im sorry you this guy is bothering you. I don’t understand if he thinks he is funny, or if he is trying to get negative attention, or be a bully, or what, but you shouldn’t have to put up with his unwanted attention. He never asked you to be his girlfriend. That’s a good thing to remind people..it isn’t breaking up because you never agreed to be his girlfriend in the first place, right? Good luck, and stay cool.

Have Hope · Feb 29, 2020 at 06:19 AM

Cut him out of your life. Don't talk to him about why. He won't understand that he's abusive. Don't try to reason with him or talk to him about it. You're not even his girlfriend.

sarahsweets · Mar 01, 2020 at 07:51 AM

Be done with this guy. Aside from him making fun of you he sounds unstable because he says he would kill himself if you broke up with him. Saying that is a type of control and its emotional hijacking.

Buffy01 · Mar 01, 2020 at 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedBanana

So, I’m friends with this guy and he keeps telling people that I’m his girlfriend, when I’m not, and so whenever someone brings up “What would you do if Molly broke up with you?” he always says the same thing

Possible trigger:

“I would kill myself”,

but I’ve been told he only says that when I’m there, otherwise he tells them that he would cry for days (apparently). He quite often won’t listen to what I have to say and the quote ‘Other people have the right to express their incorrect opinions’ sums him up quite well, I’m scared to ‘break up’ with him because I don’t want to deal with the drama of everyone asking me why and I have a lot of people who want to be my friend and they would batter him, he would stand no chance. What he does is definitely catagorized as abuse, but I’m too scared to talk to him about it. we have both been diagnosed with autism or ASD but he insists that because he is a boy he has worse autism than me, I have frequent shutdowns in school and I’ve never seen him stim ever and

Possible trigger:

he claims that it’s because I look like a freak when I bounce up and down repeatedly or flap my arms, apparently I’m just a weird, fat, retarded freak to him, I he does not hesitate to tell me that.

I just need help leaving..

I would report him to the school and file charges against him for harassment and let them know he talking about suicide. See if anyone else will speak out against them. You don't need to be around someone like that.

ARaven0137 · Mar 02, 2020 at 06:00 PM

Hugs to you, RB. I was going through something almost exactly like that recently. I had a guy, who insisted that I was his GF because I was kind and a good listener for him. He kept demanding more and more and would make the wild, uncontrollable rants and threats to harm himself if I didn't comply. I was an emotional hostage for many months, feeling like I was the one responsible for his well being and his safety. Mine was abusive too. I finally had to cut ties and let nature take its course, which is very difficult for me. I frequently worry about his safety even now as it's been three days since I heard from him and his parents have no idea where he is. But, I think you have to get to the point where you understand that he will do what he is going to do and it's his responsibility, not yours. I know it's not easy, trust me.

I am pulling for you to get through this. I am where you're at and it's exhausting.

Menu

My Support Forums - Mental Health Support Groups

Get emotional support and friendship from others like you!

[Possible trigger warning (emotional/psychological abuse)] help me, please

My Support Forums

TishaBuv Legendary Member Since Dec 2014 Location: USA Posts: 10,181 (SuperPoster!) 9 1,869 hugs given	Feb 29, 2020 at 12:12 AM #2 Hello RedBanana, and welcome to PC! This sounds like a very uncomfortable and difficult situation. Do you have someone you can talk to who can help? Parents? School counselor? __________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T
	Reply With Quote

Have Hope Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2017 Location: Eastern, USA Posts: 9,082 (SuperPoster!) 6 3,626 hugs given	Feb 29, 2020 at 06:19 AM #4 Cut him out of your life. Don't talk to him about why. He won't understand that he's abusive. Don't try to reason with him or talk to him about it. You're not even his girlfriend. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes
	Reply With Quote

sarahsweets Threadtastic Postaholic Member Since Dec 2018 Location: New Jersey Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!) 5 192 hugs given	Mar 01, 2020 at 07:51 AM #5 Be done with this guy. Aside from him making fun of you he sounds unstable because he says he would kill himself if you broke up with him. Saying that is a type of control and its emotional hijacking. __________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society.
	Reply With Quote