[Bookworm257]

My relationship with my dad's gf is really suffering right now because of something I did the other day, and I don't know how to make it up and repair the relationship.

Basically what happened was that we got into a huge fight over something that should have been a small thing.

She accused me of not doing something I disticntly remembered doing, and then I later brought it up to her and accused her lying and messing with me. I basically called her a lying, manipulative POS without bothering to question my memory of things. She said I was the lying one and it basically turned into us shouting at each other and accusing the other person of lying. I never, ever get angry or shout at people so I'm honestly confused as to why I let my feelings boil over like that.

The next day, I am home alone while she's at work. I am feeling bad about it all still but I am calmer and more rational. I realize out of the blue- my memory of doing what it was, was a memory not from yesterday but the day before. I was literally the one who was wrong and saying things that weren't true. On top of that, I just accused someone who I love and loves me, who is one of the nicest most positive people who has been in my life, of doing a nasty manipulative thing that they would never do, and I hurt them deeply. Something was blocking my ability to think rationally or question my own perception and memory of things and I let the thoughts fester in me.

It's three days later now, and I've apologized to her. We're on a little better terms but she's still mad and upset at me. I feel so guilty about having hurt her and accused her of something she would never do. She doesn't trust me and she's really upset with me.

I want to try and make it up to her and be a better person to her going forward, but I don't know how to do that, or if she would wonder if I was even being sincere.

What are some things I could do to better the relationship, or show her I'm sorry and try to heal our relationship?

[TishaBuv]

You were a big enough person to question if it was you who had lied and apologize to her. You said some very nice, loving things about her here, that you could tell her. And you can continue to not fly off the handle and question yourself next time there’s a conflict.

[mote.of.soul]

Well, you've fully owned your mistake @Bookworm257, and made amends, so that's it. Done. She knows you're sorry. Now, just let time show your stepmother that you're a trustworthy person. She'll get over it eventually, you'll see. Just go about your days as per usual.

[Iloivar]

If you haven't already, You can ask her yourself how you can make it up to her, and you can explain that your memory got mixed up. As another poster suggested, tell us what you told us here.

But she might just need some time before her anger for what happened dissappears or lessens to the point your relationship can resume back to normal.

I applaud you for reflecting on the event and realizing you were wrong.

Did you have stress building up towards her or something else, before you had the argument?

[MsLady]

Can I ask you how old you are? How long have you lived with your stepmom?

I ask because it sounds like she was being insensitive and disrespectful about your personal hygiene habits and I suspect it was a trigger for you. For example, if you told her you already had a shower, it's unnecessary to tell you to take one again.. even if you lied.

[downandlonely]

You did what you could by apologizing, and you can reflect on this next time you have an argument to avoid losing your temper. I suspect she will come around in time.