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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:16 PM
  #21
I know. I've been wondering the same exact thing. Like did something erupt between the two of them? It seems very odd that after TWENTY years she would be let go, and especially right now? And yeah, you would think at least some sort of compensation so that she can land on her feet again.

The whole situation just sucks.

When my husband came home I learned the sister in law guilt tripped him into taking the cat -- she pulled a number on him to get him to agree. He did ask and check with me first too, but still, she guilted him when he tried to say no. Not cool.

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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:21 PM
  #22
They wouldn’t give her time to find a place. That’s bizarre. She must be quite elderly too.
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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:24 PM
  #23
I don't know how much notice they gave her. She is in her seventies and has a walking cane.

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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:34 PM
  #24
It's horrible. I cannot imagine telling essentially a longtime family member to move out during COVID when she really has no other home. I also cannot imagine splitting up two sister cats who grew up together, know each other and love each other. The whole thing is a disaster.

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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 08:07 PM
  #25
It’s so stressful
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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 06:35 AM
  #26
Yes. I feel really awful for the poor nanny.

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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 01:04 PM
  #27
I am SOOOOOO angry at my husband right now. He has been trying to force this cat onto me, when I told him yesterday that I never even wanted a third cat to begin with, that I only said yes to him because I didn't want to be the a-hole, and now our sister in law has found the cat a home, he is trying to make me feel like the a-hole regardless for giving her away to a different family. Mind you, the new family is a friend of the original breeder of this cat. They have a similar breed cat who can buddy up with this cat and play with her. She will be in good hands, well cared for and loved. They are excited to have her, they live within our state and are willing to come pick her up.

But now I am the a-hole because I want to send her away and not deal with it anymore.

She's been isolated from the other 2 cats for the past 18 hours, locked in her own room with food, litter, water, a bed, and toys. Apparently, we were supposed to isolate her for 3-5 days to begin with, in order to properly integrate her with our other 2 cats and into our home.

I am laid off from work and am therefore home 24/7 dealing with the new cat by myself. So I have to go into her room periodically to check on her, pet her, love her up and console her. I also have to deal with her crying from behind the door. He doesn't have to deal with any of that during the day because he's working.

He has been trying to force this on me rather than respecting the fact that I didn't really want to do this. And now he's telling me he's sick to his stomach over it.

I am really angry with him. He is NOT thinking of ME at all in this.

AND... we just talked on the phone about it. He was clearly so tense with me, and hung up the phone without saying I love you.

IF he makes me out to be the a-hole in this situation that sprung up because of HIS family, to his own parents AND friends, I am going to be livid and will divorce him over it.... I am THAT angry right now.

This is not only my fault, but I blame him as well for trying to force this additional cat on me.

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Last edited by Have Hope; Aug 04, 2020 at 02:25 PM..
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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 03:37 PM
  #28
The new cat owners came and went. They seem like very loving people!!!! Super nice, gave the cat loads of affection and loving immediately, and they are thrilled to have her. So she has a very loving home to go to, and I feel very comforted & comfortable with that.

I am most relieved.

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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 03:56 PM
  #29
So, in sum, I just had a GREAT lesson about boundaries and saying NO when I really don't want something. As lesson to take with me moving forward.

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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 04:25 PM
  #30
Good news. It all worked out nicely. Your husband should be happy, not angry. Finding more appropriate loving home for a pet is the best solution for people AND for a cat AND your two cats for whom it’s also a stressful situation! Now everyone is in the best place possible
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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 04:38 PM
  #31
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Originally Posted by divine1966 View Post
Good news. It all worked out nicely. Your husband should be happy, not angry. Finding more appropriate loving home for a pet is the best solution for people AND for a cat AND your two cats for whom it’s also a stressful situation! Now everyone is in the best place possible
I agree wholeheartedly about everything you wrote!!

He needs to just deal with this. I told him he was only thinking of what HE wanted and not about what I wanted. He also falsely believed the cat would be happy here eventually, but she was hissing at our other cats for TWO days!

I think this was the best solution for the kitty and for all involved. Except for my husband, who is being very short sighted about all of it.

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Default Aug 09, 2020 at 11:14 AM
  #32
Ugh I feel your frustration. It feels like I’m always learning about boundaries... it just goes on and on and every single time I don’t say no I always wonder why did I get myself into another situation like that again. I guess we are making “progress” not necessarily “perfection.” I’m glad things worked out in the end with the cat.
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Default Aug 09, 2020 at 11:58 AM
  #33
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Originally Posted by LilyMop View Post
Ugh I feel your frustration. It feels like I’m always learning about boundaries... it just goes on and on and every single time I don’t say no I always wonder why did I get myself into another situation like that again. I guess we are making “progress” not necessarily “perfection.” I’m glad things worked out in the end with the cat.
Oh I know the feeling. It takes practice!! Perfection is impossible. But progress is positive. And thanks so much... it all worked out very well with the cat, and my husband got over it quickly. All is back to normal again. Phew.

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