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Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2014
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 1,302
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#1
...something you're not supposed to know?
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Member
Member Since Apr 2020
Location: UK
Posts: 179
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#2
what do you mean?
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Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2014
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 1,302
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#3
Something happened, no one told me, now I'm angry. I didn't think this was a difficult question.
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2019
Location: Toodlepip
Posts: 1,711
5 |
#4
The question is not particularly clear and the context is obscure.
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Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2014
Location: PNW
Posts: 1,394
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#5
It depends a lot on my relationship with the people in question, why the information is being kept from me, if it's actually my business, how I found out, how angry I actually am... If it were about my T I'd definitely talk about it.
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
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#6
While I might be angry about it I would try to keep in mind there was a reason I wasnt told. Eventually, it would likely come out and in dur time I would find out.
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 2,787
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#7
If I'm not supposed to know about it, then I probably should stay out of it. Is it even about me? If so, then is there anything I can/should do about it. If it isn't about me? What am I angry about? Is it the having been left out of knowing? Why do I feel like it should have been told to me?
I guess what I am saying is think your thinking through. I am a believer that HOW I think about something and WHY I think about it pretty much drive my emotions. If I can reality-check my thinking, often that calms down my emotions. |
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Magnate
Member Since Sep 2013
Posts: 2,011
10 |
#8
There aren't many options. Either you address it or you let it go, since you weren't supposed to know about it in the first place.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,123
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#9
It depends on the person for me. With my mom I address it. If I was snooping where I shouldn’t have been and I find stuff then I figure it’s my own fault and I let it go.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,367
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#10
It depends. Was it something you think you needed to know? Like whatever happened was the thing you supposed to know but people hId it from you as to exclude and hurt you? Were you deliberately not told as there was some type of agenda in them not telling you?
Personally if whatever happened isn’t really about me then I’d let it go |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: 8CS / NYS / USA
Posts: 9,136
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#11
for me what I do, depends on what it is that Im not supposed to know about...
sometimes I go to the source and say I heard about such and such and heres what Im thinking sometimes I let the issue slide and consider that I cant control what ever it is, and that my anger may be just that no one told me. Im not expected to know everything about everyone elses life or everything that does not directly relate to me. its a pick your battles thing for me. so for most situations where I may not know something then find out accidentally I just handle my own emotions like I do with any other time I have gotten angry ....breathe and do something comforting to me. and let the big secret I wasnt meant to know about work itself out. |
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