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WovenGalaxy
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Default Sep 20, 2020 at 03:23 PM
  #21
Is he (your friend who smiled when you got nervous) typically like this? Did you express your discomfort or was your nervousness internal?
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Default Sep 20, 2020 at 03:35 PM
  #22
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Originally Posted by WovenGalaxy View Post
Is he (your friend who smiled when you got nervous) typically like this? Did you express your discomfort or was your nervousness internal?

He's a little bit douche in general but he always respected me and he was okay with skipping my relationships in our conversations. He never pushed it untill that night few days ago. But also I never shared that much good news about my life with him, because I never had so much done. As I shared, he reacted the way I've described.

And yes, I looked down and I wasn't sure how to react, what to say.
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Default Sep 20, 2020 at 03:43 PM
  #23
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Originally Posted by seesaw View Post
Well now you are giving us a little more context. It sounds like, with this man in particular, he was taking pleasure in you not having a GF right now. I can understand wanting to distance from someone who, rather than celebrate the good things, points out what THEY think it lacking. It does sound to me like you're working on health relationships because you said you weren't trying to have a gf right now for those reasons of not wanting to hurt others (or at least that's what I interpreted).

Are you a therapist? Honestly, the way you choose words makes me listen and think and it doesn't happen too often to me. I appreciate your advice and yes, your interpretation is correct.
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seesaw
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Default Sep 20, 2020 at 03:50 PM
  #24
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Are you a therapist? Honestly, the way you choose words makes me listen and think and it doesn't happen too often to me. I appreciate your advice and yes, your interpretation is correct.
Haha, no, I'm not a therapist but I'm training to be an independent patient advocate so I've learned a few support techniques. I'm glad it's been useful to you.

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Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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WovenGalaxy
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Default Sep 21, 2020 at 09:57 PM
  #25
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Originally Posted by MisterPaul View Post
He's a little bit douche in general but he always respected me and he was okay with skipping my relationships in our conversations. He never pushed it untill that night few days ago. But also I never shared that much good news about my life with him, because I never had so much done. As I shared, he reacted the way I've described.

And yes, I looked down and I wasn't sure how to react, what to say.
My reason for asking was: could it be that this was a misunderstanding / miscommunication? The facts are he generally respects you, you felt nervous by his comment but didn't express that outright, he smiled and there a a possibility that you're assuming he knew you were nervous and was enjoying that. Perhaps there's another explanation for his smile.

Of course, do what you want about this situation. But these are my thoughts.
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Default Sep 22, 2020 at 03:32 PM
  #26
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Originally Posted by WovenGalaxy View Post
My reason for asking was: could it be that this was a misunderstanding / miscommunication? The facts are he generally respects you, you felt nervous by his comment but didn't express that outright, he smiled and there a a possibility that you're assuming he knew you were nervous and was enjoying that. Perhaps there's another explanation for his smile.

Of course, do what you want about this situation. But these are my thoughts.
You may be right but we have to be realistic. I have a huge deficit in relationships and it’s natural for other males to hold it against me to feel superior. My defense response is that I truly do not care about those guys unless they give me something I want. I knew this particular individual for three years and I don’t have any doubts or regrets about this decision of mine. I’ve already started the silent treatment and I feel both great and broken. Broken because I see how dysfunctional and superficial my relationships are and great because ending them can actually make a change.
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Default Nov 14, 2020 at 12:46 PM
  #27
Do things in your own time, my grandmother thought i should get a girlfriend, but when i did she didnt say anything about it. Just do what you think is best, but i do agree with these people, a girlfriend is a good thing. If you are sure you can keep your success why not, and by the way chose wisely from women, because some look like kitty cats but they are actually dragons. This is why i did not keep my girlfriend and let her go.
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