advertisement
View Poll Results: What do I do
Should I shower her with my love 0 0%
Should I shower her with my love
0 0%
Find away to prove myself 2 40.00%
Find away to prove myself
2 40.00%
Get more help 3 60.00%
Get more help
3 60.00%
All of the above 0 0%
All of the above
0 0%
Voters: 5. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
Jaydizzl3
Newly Joined
Jaydizzl3 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2020
Location: Calgary Alberta
Posts: 1
3 yr Member
Unhappy Oct 14, 2020 at 12:15 PM
  #1
Hi I have an issue I started dating a girl I fell in love with 5 years ago I got out of a serious relationship with another girl of 4 years but I realized that I wanted the other girl more I waited till I was ready to be with her and it was going good for the first little bit but then I started trying to change her and wasn’t giving her the support she needed like not being a shoulder for her to cry on all I want to do is be the man she deserves but I feel I’m to self absorbed and scared of being hurt again can anyone give me help on what I should do
Jaydizzl3 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote

advertisement
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,093 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
21.3k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Oct 14, 2020 at 07:02 PM
  #2
How old are you?
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
eskielover
Legendary Wise Elder
 
eskielover's Avatar
eskielover has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2004
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 24,701 (SuperPoster!)
15 yr Member
14.5k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Oct 16, 2020 at 02:27 AM
  #3
I will say....showering someone with your love can come across as smothering & a huge turnoff especially if she is rather independent.

Proving yourself just doesn't work. If you can't win her by being yourself there is no way you can prove anything.

That is exactly why I selected you need more help on your poll. You need to learn how to have relationships & truly connect with others. Everything else falls into place when you truly connect with someone

__________________


Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this.
Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018
eskielover is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,301 (SuperPoster!)
20 yr Member
81.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Oct 18, 2020 at 10:41 PM
  #4
I think you need more help. Also if you give us a bit more information here, we will be able to provide more detailed responses. I also think that being yourself is the only way to ''win'' her. I am doubtful if showering her with more attention will help. But as I really do not know much at all about you I can't be completely sure. I have no idea of her personality. I'd be interested to know more

__________________
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Prycejosh1987
Member
Prycejosh1987 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2020
Location: UK
Posts: 368
3 yr Member
Default Nov 11, 2020 at 01:15 PM
  #5
You do not want to be too loving, that will cause her to feel something is wrong, You should prove your love for her from time to time, women naturally like bad boys and are attracted to them. I am not saying be a bad boy, just do the right things at a the right time. The best part of men women like is when the man is protective of her and is very independent.
Prycejosh1987 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
sarahsweets
Threadtastic Postaholic
 
sarahsweets's Avatar
sarahsweets has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
192 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Nov 13, 2020 at 03:03 AM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prycejosh1987 View Post
You do not want to be too loving, that will cause her to feel something is wrong, You should prove your love for her from time to time, women naturally like bad boys and are attracted to them. I am not saying be a bad boy, just do the right things at a the right time. The best part of men women like is when the man is protective of her and is very independent.
Hey @Prycejosh1987
Dont you feel like this is a bit sexist?

__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"

President of the no F's given society.
sarahsweets is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
lizardlady
divine1966
Legendary Wise Elder
 
divine1966's Avatar
divine1966 Tired!!!
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,304 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,274 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Nov 13, 2020 at 05:58 AM
  #7
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prycejosh1987 View Post
You do not want to be too loving, that will cause her to feel something is wrong, You should prove your love for her from time to time, women naturally like bad boys and are attracted to them. I am not saying be a bad boy, just do the right things at a the right time. The best part of men women like is when the man is protective of her and is very independent.
I can assure you most women do not like bad boys at all. And one can’t possibly be “too” loving.

What do you base your advice on? Research? Personal opinion? Experience?
divine1966 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
lizardlady, sarahsweets
Anonymous42048
Guest
Anonymous42048 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Nov 13, 2020 at 06:52 AM
  #8
Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966 View Post
I can assure you most women do not like bad boys at all. And one can’t possibly be “too” loving.

What do you base your advice on? Research? Personal opinion? Experience?
Experience. Being attention junky who crossed the line every chance he got I can tell you that women like bad boys a lot. By "like" I mean attraction and attention. You'd be amazed how some of them responded to me even with their partners being around. **

* - I'm talking about women 22-35 years old.
*- I'm not talking about relationship-like kind of situation, just social encounters.
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
divine1966
Legendary Wise Elder
 
divine1966's Avatar
divine1966 Tired!!!
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,304 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,274 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Nov 13, 2020 at 07:23 AM
  #9
Like I said yes there are men and women who are attracted to trouble and are drawn to bad treatment, sadly it’s stemming from childhood and the way they were brought up. Therapy is a good first step in combating this unhealthy attraction

NONE of that means that it is a good advice to tell men to treat women badly because “that’s what women like”.
divine1966 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Anonymous42048
Guest
Anonymous42048 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Nov 13, 2020 at 08:08 AM
  #10
Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966 View Post
NONE of that means that it is a good advice to tell men to treat women badly because “that’s what women like”.
That depends on what do you mean by "treating women badly". I've seen confident douche...gs with nothing to offer winning over smart, attractive girls way too many times... And there was always that decent guy standing in the corner, watching.

Point being, I think people (especially women) love what's interesting more than anything else. Being safe and respected has very little to do with the thrill.
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
divine1966
Legendary Wise Elder
 
divine1966's Avatar
divine1966 Tired!!!
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,304 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,274 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Nov 13, 2020 at 09:00 AM
  #11
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterPaul View Post
That depends on what do you mean by "treating women badly". I've seen confident douche...gs with nothing to offer winning over smart, attractive girls way too many times... And there was always that decent guy standing in the corner, watching.

Point being, I think people (especially women) love what's interesting more than anything else. Being safe and respected has very little to do with the thrill.
Yes sadly people are often drawn to bad partners versus looking for nice people instead. Unhealthy patterns are common.

It doesn’t mean it’s wise to encourage people to be less loving. Not a good advice.
divine1966 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
eskielover
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:48 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.