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rdgrad15
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Default Nov 12, 2020 at 09:00 AM
  #21
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Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
I used to enjoy all the holidays and never had any bad issues with them until I got married. My h and my mother made it a struggle. Due to their behavior (they wouldn’t play any reindeer games ), I would try to make nice holidays but nearly always ended up crying in frustration.

I would love it if I were with other people who I got along with better, and we could enjoy holidays. I love to entertain and celebrate. I’d make a party and celebrate anything! I’m a merry maker.
I used to love the holidays too back when I was a kid. I started to dislike them during my teen years and really began to hate it when I was in college. Yeah family unfortunately tends to ruin it. I agree that celebrating the holidays with people you actually like makes it better. I don't care for New Years either, but I am always at a friend's house for New Years. Nothing crazy, we just hang out. For me, that is way more enjoyable than being around noisy boisterous family members.
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Default Nov 12, 2020 at 09:21 AM
  #22
This is true when we grow up, we perceive everything differently, and so do the holidays.

But I have the opposite situation than the author.

I want to celebrate Christmas with my big family in a beautifully decorated house, as in childhood. But in recent years this has not happened. Because my parents always work at Christmas, my brother lives abroad, and I don't have a husband and children to celebrate with. And when my friends tell me how they celebrated Christmas with their family, or when I see their stories on Instagram, I get sad because I don't have that family comfort on holidays. I feel lonely
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Default Nov 12, 2020 at 03:17 PM
  #23
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This is true when we grow up, we perceive everything differently, and so do the holidays.

But I have the opposite situation than the author.

I want to celebrate Christmas with my big family in a beautifully decorated house, as in childhood. But in recent years this has not happened. Because my parents always work at Christmas, my brother lives abroad, and I don't have a husband and children to celebrate with. And when my friends tell me how they celebrated Christmas with their family, or when I see their stories on Instagram, I get sad because I don't have that family comfort on holidays. I feel lonely
Aw I’m sorry you feel lonely. Yeah the holidays can bring about those feelings as well, loneliness and sadness. I totally get it. It can bring up painful memories too.
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Default Dec 10, 2020 at 11:23 AM
  #24
I love holidays i spend it with family members and go out with my brothers.
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Default Dec 10, 2020 at 11:38 AM
  #25
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I love holidays i spend it with family members and go out with my brothers.
That’s good. Glad the holidays are still enjoyable for you.
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Default Dec 11, 2020 at 07:00 AM
  #26
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I was thinking about this recently (and how christmas has changed over the years for me)

I've never had a "good" or a " magical" christmas, none that I can remember or that stand out

but I do know when I was younger I'd get more excited- make an effert to leave the food out for santa. watch the muppet's. decorate the house. play christmas music- christmas was magical in another way (not because I had people to spend it with, it's because I had the childhood wonder of it)
and now that's all gone

I still hold my traditions (I still watch the muppet's, I still decorate, still listen to christmas music) but I've learned a lot over the years about christmas

their is no santa (and believing in him doesn't get you anywhere)

it is very stressfull buying everything and decorating

and, if you're like me and have no one, christmas is very, very, cold

and lonely
How do you cope with this if you do not mind my asking?.My parents are dead I live alone and really miss my parents, I do not see family. I have some friends but am not really a people person but don't want to be alone either.

I am severly depressed now. I am asked to breakfast with friends tomorrow and got a gift from one friend but i feel really down, How can i survive this xmas here i do not know. everyone where i live are in families
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Default Dec 11, 2020 at 11:33 AM
  #27
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How do you cope with this if you do not mind my asking?.My parents are dead I live alone and really miss my parents, I do not see family. I have some friends but am not really a people person but don't want to be alone either.

I am severly depressed now. I am asked to breakfast with friends tomorrow and got a gift from one friend but i feel really down, How can i survive this xmas here i do not know. everyone where i live are in families
Aw I’m sorry you feel that way. Honestly, beibg with friends can help but I understand that you’re not a people person. Maybe talk with them over the phone if you don’t want to be with them in person. Both family and friends.
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Default Dec 11, 2020 at 04:35 PM
  #28
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Aw I’m sorry you feel that way. Honestly, beibg with friends can help but I understand that you’re not a people person. Maybe talk with them over the phone if you don’t want to be with them in person. Both family and friends.
not in contact with family
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Default Dec 11, 2020 at 10:51 PM
  #29
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not in contact with family
Ohh okay I’m sorry.
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Default Dec 13, 2020 at 03:47 PM
  #30
When I had no one around for holidays, I volunteered in a homeless shelter on Christmas night and new year Eve or any other holidays etc

There is always someone less fortunate who needs your help on holidays. Or you could have a job where you could choose to work on holidays.

Most certainly not everyone has families and many people are in the hospital or shelter or on the streets during holidays. Help them out, that’s how you can cope.
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Default Dec 14, 2020 at 08:16 AM
  #31
I haven't been very excited about the holidays for years. When I was a kid, we decorated, baked cookies, listened to Christmas music and all. I haven't been in the mood for that for ages. With pets, decorating is hard, and I rarely eat sweets, so I don't see the point of baking.

When I lived in the US, I celebrated more. I lived in a city that attracted a lot of people from elsewhere and many didn't go home for the holidays. Therefore, there always seemed to be things going on - pre-Christmas brunch at a local restaurant or friends inviting you over for Thanksgiving. My ex and I usually put up a small tree.


When I moved here, my ex and I always had obligations with his family for Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve. I didn't always enjoy it, though. Some family members didn't seem to approve of me because I was not the traditional Chilean woman they wanted him to end up with.


This year, it's just me and my husband. Most people celebrate with family. My husband's not close to his and my family is in the US, so we are kind of left on our own. Even if family were closer, with Covid, it's not advisable. When we lived in the capital we would sometimes get together with neighbor friends for the new year and we'd do gift exchanges around Christmas. Under more normal circumstances, I'd see about taking the train in to get together with a few people and exchange gifts, but these aren't normal times, obviously. My friends and I all have weekends free only, and they have tightened restrictions on the whole Metropolitan Region, where we are locked down on weekends with only one permit to go out.


Hopefully, the pandemic will be over in the relatively near future, so I can see friends again. That has been one of the hardest parts of this situation.
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Default Dec 14, 2020 at 12:33 PM
  #32
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When I had no one around for holidays, I volunteered in a homeless shelter on Christmas night and new year Eve or any other holidays etc

There is always someone less fortunate who needs your help on holidays. Or you could have a job where you could choose to work on holidays.

Most certainly not everyone has families and many people are in the hospital or shelter or on the streets during holidays. Help them out, that’s how you can cope.
That’s a smart idea.
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Default Dec 15, 2020 at 11:01 AM
  #33
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I haven't been very excited about the holidays for years. When I was a kid, we decorated, baked cookies, listened to Christmas music and all. I haven't been in the mood for that for ages. With pets, decorating is hard, and I rarely eat sweets, so I don't see the point of baking.

When I lived in the US, I celebrated more. I lived in a city that attracted a lot of people from elsewhere and many didn't go home for the holidays. Therefore, there always seemed to be things going on - pre-Christmas brunch at a local restaurant or friends inviting you over for Thanksgiving. My ex and I usually put up a small tree.


When I moved here, my ex and I always had obligations with his family for Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve. I didn't always enjoy it, though. Some family members didn't seem to approve of me because I was not the traditional Chilean woman they wanted him to end up with.


This year, it's just me and my husband. Most people celebrate with family. My husband's not close to his and my family is in the US, so we are kind of left on our own. Even if family were closer, with Covid, it's not advisable. When we lived in the capital we would sometimes get together with neighbor friends for the new year and we'd do gift exchanges around Christmas. Under more normal circumstances, I'd see about taking the train in to get together with a few people and exchange gifts, but these aren't normal times, obviously. My friends and I all have weekends free only, and they have tightened restrictions on the whole Metropolitan Region, where we are locked down on weekends with only one permit to go out.


Hopefully, the pandemic will be over in the relatively near future, so I can see friends again. That has been one of the hardest parts of this situation.
Yeah I totally understand about the restrictions. I do believe it will be over in the near future. In fact, I read that many experts believe that now with vaccines rolling out, this is the beginning of the end for the pandemic. Yeah I am not close with my family either.
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Default Dec 15, 2020 at 11:40 AM
  #34
The whole idea about Christmas is giving and sharing and even being thankful. That is what having the Christmas spirit is all about. This is about celebration and this began to get taken over by commercializing it in order to increase "buying" things that meant increased sales for merchants. This also got taken over when this certain holiday was changed from Christmas to just a simple "Holiday" so as to remove the religious aspect of it.

Whether it be Christmas or Hanukkah or other forms of religious celebrations, the theme is actually the same in that it's the spirit of giving and gathering. It just got marketed and became a time of so many profiting instead of what it was really supposed to be meant for.
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Default Dec 15, 2020 at 12:30 PM
  #35
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The whole idea about Christmas is giving and sharing and even being thankful. That is what having the Christmas spirit is all about. This is about celebration and this began to get taken over by commercializing it in order to increase "buying" things that meant increased sales for merchants. This also got taken over when this certain holiday was changed from Christmas to just a simple "Holiday" so as to remove the religious aspect of it.

Whether it be Christmas or Hanukkah or other forms of religious celebrations, the theme is actually the same in that it's the spirit of giving and gathering. It just got marketed and became a time of so many profiting instead of what it was really supposed to be meant for.
I totally agree. Also it has become a time of obligation too. People doing things or visiting people, usually family members, when they really don’t want to. People stress themselves out when it isn’t necessary and just creates a negative atmosphere. It isn’t as much of a happy time as it once was. In fact, I read an article not long ago that shows a lot of people pulling the pandemic card in order to avoid seeing family members they prefer not to see. And they have a legitimate reason too. And I know people who are pulling the pandemic card too. They admitted they mainly just don’t want to be bothered, as well as not wanting to get sick.
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