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Phrysca · Nov 25, 2020 at 10:49 AM

How do I get family to understand that a mental illness does not mean I am crazy?

I am six out of seven siblings. I'm forty and I didn't realize how old fashion they were until I heard my mother say that I was crazy. I thought she'd understand after I was diagnosed clinically depressed and told her that I needed to seek counseling. Her question was more of a statement when she said, "So you're crazy." And it was more of a fact to her before she finished her sentance. I never really got along with my mother growing up, but I was never disrespectful. I began to build a relationship with her after I found out I was pregnant with my daughter. I didn't want my daughter to hate me like I did my mother. Which backfired because my mother took her from me claiming me crazy. At this point, it seems they want me to go crazy. I don't know.... I think it's working....

Open Eyes · Nov 25, 2020 at 11:26 AM

Are you seeing a therapist? It's possible your mother is a narcissist and they need to control everything and they tend to be all about themselves and your needs and feelings are not important. They typically have to have all their needs take priority and expect others to be loyal and service their needs. They are not good parents and tend to have children for selfish needs. Typically your needs are an imposition to them. They prefer others be who THEY need them to be. And they can rage if they don't get that from others.

PTSD depression is different. You need help and support from a therapist that can help you understand that and learn how to distance from those who are unhealthy for you.

RoxanneToto · Nov 25, 2020 at 11:43 AM

You’re not crazy, but I really hope you can find ways to protect yourself and your daughter from your mother. You might love her, I appreciate that, but her behaviour could be (has been?) really damaging to you.

mote.of.soul · Nov 26, 2020 at 08:47 AM

Hi Phrysca.

In my experience and from what I now understand, unless the person is already quite introspective and thoughtful, it will basically take a quantum leap in their knowledge about mental illness before they begin changing their views, which is essentially about changing themselves. And that's only if they have the kind of temperament open to change.

Books could help them and also podcasts and videos as well.🙏

divine1966 · Nov 26, 2020 at 08:55 AM

Your mother sound ignorant and rude. I hope you can distance yourself from her

How did she take your daughter away? You can’t just take people’s children away. How old is your daughter? I’d speak to authorities immediately if she actually took her away as keeps her away from you even if she believes you are “crazy”. It doesn’t work that way. She doesn’t get to decide if you can raise your own kids, judge would decide on that

Rive. · Nov 26, 2020 at 10:19 AM

How can she *take* your daughter away from you?? She has no rights over your daughter. Did this go to court?

I would have as little to do with that woman as possible. You can't change people who choose to remain uninformed, ignorant or who are judgmental.

divine1966 · Nov 26, 2020 at 10:28 AM

You mentioned on the other thread that CPS got involved. Still even if CPS is involved your mother has no legal rights to take your daughter. Go through proper channels to do it legal way. No one can just take kids away without proper procedures so don’t let your mother tell you otherwise

Prycejosh1987 · Dec 05, 2020 at 12:44 PM

By acting normal and reasonable. My mother was mentally ill but i couldnt tell. I was surprised when she told me. Just be yourself, and over time they will stop thinking you are crazy.

sarahsweets · Dec 09, 2020 at 03:29 AM

I disagree that your mothers behavior means she is a narcissist. Just because someone has the issues she has and the insensitivity doesnt mean she is a narcisisst. People tend to label people narcissists when that is a personality disorder that takes years to formally diagnose and treat. It sounds more like ignorance to me.

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RoxanneToto Grand Poohbah Member Since Aug 2020 Location: England Posts: 1,692 3 6,991 hugs given	Nov 25, 2020 at 11:43 AM #3 You’re not crazy, but I really hope you can find ways to protect yourself and your daughter from your mother. You might love her, I appreciate that, but her behaviour could be (has been?) really damaging to you.
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Rive. Magnate Member Since Sep 2013 Posts: 2,014 10	Nov 26, 2020 at 10:19 AM #6 How can she take your daughter away from you?? She has no rights over your daughter. Did this go to court? I would have as little to do with that woman as possible. You can't change people who choose to remain uninformed, ignorant or who are judgmental.
	Reply With Quote

divine1966 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2014 Location: US Posts: 22,375 (SuperPoster!) 9 1,277 hugs given	Nov 26, 2020 at 10:28 AM #7 You mentioned on the other thread that CPS got involved. Still even if CPS is involved your mother has no legal rights to take your daughter. Go through proper channels to do it legal way. No one can just take kids away without proper procedures so don’t let your mother tell you otherwise
	Reply With Quote

Prycejosh1987 Member Member Since Jul 2020 Location: UK Posts: 368 3	Dec 05, 2020 at 12:44 PM #8 By acting normal and reasonable. My mother was mentally ill but i couldnt tell. I was surprised when she told me. Just be yourself, and over time they will stop thinking you are crazy.
	Reply With Quote