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Default Oct 22, 2018 at 04:17 PM
  #41
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Originally Posted by lucozader View Post
Thinking about this is really underlining how bad my self-image has become in recent years because there's no way I could imagine that either of them were ever attracted to me in the slightest.

I used to be quite a seductive person but I've lost that aspect of myself. No-one wants to f*** me any more.
Maybe there is a silver lining in this? It may not be all that bad not to be so seductive as a default behavior, not to use seduction/sex to automatically relate to a lot of people. Maybe it's a more mature way and it's also better that people do not notice you as a sexual object primarily? Also, I think that the people who don't necessarily express sexual attraction in any situation can sometimes be healthier and more complex characters.
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Default Oct 22, 2018 at 04:21 PM
  #42
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Originally Posted by lucozader View Post
Thinking about this is really underlining how bad my self-image has become in recent years because there's no way I could imagine that either of them were ever attracted to me in the slightest.

I used to be quite a seductive person but I've lost that aspect of myself. No-one wants to f*** me any more.
Sexual feelings in therapy aren't an indicator of attractiveness (though obviously it can be).

Sorry you are feeling down on yourself.
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Default Nov 01, 2018 at 01:07 PM
  #43
My T was gay so probably not!
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Default Nov 04, 2018 at 07:18 AM
  #44
I would like my T to be honest about it, because as You can see from the other topic about pink flags, mine is creating a sexual tension (or maybe I am doing it also?) and then he pretends nothing happened... I prefer honesty, I would like him to tell me and at least everything would be clear, we could acknowledge what is happening and move forward. I thought that's what grown up people should do.
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Default Nov 04, 2018 at 09:00 AM
  #45
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Originally Posted by Girl from Europe View Post
I would like my T to be honest about it, because as You can see from the other topic about pink flags, mine is creating a sexual tension (or maybe I am doing it also?) and then he pretends nothing happened... I prefer honesty, I would like him to tell me and at least everything would be clear, we could acknowledge what is happening and move forward. I thought that's what grown up people should do.
I agree, i wish T's would be more honest about this stuff with clients. "lying" about it doesn't help, especially with people like me who have trust issues

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Default Nov 04, 2018 at 05:29 PM
  #46
Absolutely not. All the female therapists I saw were obviously very straight. And even if they had been gay, I don't see how challenging them would have made me attractive to them. Frankly this thread reads like a lot of wishful thinking on the client's part. I don't find the thought repulsive, not at all, simply baffling. Probably because I'm no longer in therapy.
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Default Nov 04, 2018 at 05:39 PM
  #47
Myrto, believe, there is nothing wishful about it... It's very confusing and hurting.
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Default Nov 04, 2018 at 06:04 PM
  #48
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Absolutely not. All the female therapists I saw were obviously very straight. And even if they had been gay, I don't see how challenging them would have made me attractive to them. Frankly this thread reads like a lot of wishful thinking on the client's part. I don't find the thought repulsive, not at all, simply baffling. Probably because I'm no longer in therapy.
It's known to be pretty common.

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Default Nov 04, 2018 at 08:39 PM
  #49
You know, the real problem of sharing these kind of experiences in place like this is, is that people tendo to judge things in a black or white way without even thinking: they will tell you tour T is harassing you and you should deffinitely dump him and five minutes late, that everything is your immagination and wishful thinking. That is because nobody really knows the details. One should always be honest and listen to his intuition. The truth usually is somewhere in the middle.
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Default Nov 05, 2018 at 04:02 AM
  #50
I post less and less on pc because I feel like my therapist and my therapy are being judged. Therapists are human with feelings too. I read a study saying why therapists get into relationships with patients. Some are sinister or narcissistic but many fall under the lovesick category, people who normally wouldn’t do anything improper but might be in a bad place in thier lives.
I also believe that some therapists don’t know how to handle countertransference so they deny it or don’t deal with it. It would be easier for everyone if these things could be discussed openly
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Default Nov 05, 2018 at 08:49 AM
  #51
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I post less and less on pc because I feel like my therapist and my therapy are being judged. Therapists are human with feelings too. I read a study saying why therapists get into relationships with patients. Some are sinister or narcissistic but many fall under the lovesick category, people who normally wouldn’t do anything improper but might be in a bad place in thier lives.
I also believe that some therapists don’t know how to handle countertransference so they deny it or don’t deal with it. It would be easier for everyone if these things could be discussed openly
Very much agree with all you said here, including that I post less and less for the same reasons. Why is it anyone's business anyway? If I'm not uncomfortable with it, than I don't see why anyone else needs to judge or worry about it.

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