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Old 01-27-2019, 02:23 PM #1
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Default What Do You Think?

If youíve ever been exploited by a therapist, would it help your healing to talk/email etc., with the Tís other similar victims?

(If it was possible.)

The therapist in my case had several other victims and Iím thinking of trying to find them.
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Old 01-28-2019, 06:02 AM #2
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

Yes, it would help.
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Old 01-28-2019, 08:07 AM #3
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

I'd rather just get a ****ing apology from my therapist. You know, while she continues on in her wonderful, high profile career.

Sorry about that. I would have to think about what the goals were for talking with other victims.
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Old 01-28-2019, 09:29 AM #4
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Parva View Post
I'd rather just get a ****ing apology from my therapist. You know, while she continues on in her wonderful, high profile career.

Sorry about that. I would have to think about what the goals were for talking with other victims.
Yes, I agree. A heartfelt apology from the therapist would go a long way. But he will never admit what he did in a million years. We tried having a mediation after the dust had settled but his lawyer replied something like ..no, because it wouldnít end up in my best interest...as if he *ever* really cared about my best interest.

Iím not clear on why I want to talk to other victims. We werenít allowed to talk to each other at the time. I think I would be looking for similarities in our experiences, new insights, seeing him from a different point of view...

I would want to know why, out of seven of us (or more), only three cooperated with the medical board.

He was arrested but never criminally prosecuted, and I donít know why?
I want to know if the last victim decided not to cooperate with the police to prosecute him after his arrest..or if she knows why he was never prosecuted after his arrest.

I want to know if there are more than seven of us.

There are probably other reasons.

Iím angry. At the time, I remember feeling shocked, scared, out of control, exhausted. I hadnít had the opportunity to look at the entire scope of what happened and express anger about it. I wasnít allowed to talk to him at his deposition. I have never been in a place where I have been able to let him know how angry I am.

In the beginning, I thought he had just made a mistake with me and I felt ambivilant. Knowing what I know now, I see he acted purposefully. I was a Ďmark.í And Iím very angry that he chose to get his needs met by damaging me, my family and all the secondary victims in my circle...and trying to make it *my* fault. The damage he caused has lasted for years.

Iím curious how his other victims have handled the damage..or if they havenít.

Last edited by precaryous; 01-28-2019 at 09:50 AM.
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Old 01-28-2019, 09:36 AM #5
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

I don't think so, each person experiences things differently. Just because you had similar experiences doesnt mean you have similar reactions or feelings. I'd rather talk to a uninvolved 3rd party

i'm unsure how you can find that info anyway, isn't it confidential ?
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Old 01-28-2019, 09:53 AM #6
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

Quote:
Originally Posted by DP_2017 View Post
I don't think so, each person experiences things differently. Just because you had similar experiences doesnt mean you have similar reactions or feelings. I'd rather talk to a uninvolved 3rd party

i'm unsure how you can find that info anyway, isn't it confidential ?
I found another way that doesnít involve confidentiality.

Last edited by precaryous; 01-28-2019 at 11:07 AM.
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Old 01-28-2019, 10:06 AM #7
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

Well, it honestly sounds a bit like you want to demand answers from the other victims. While it's unfair that he wasn't brought to justice, I don't think it would be ok to approach the other victims in your search for answers about why that is. I'm not sure how you could find the other victims in a way that would circumvent confidentiality. They have a right to their privacy, even from a fellow victim.
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Old 01-28-2019, 10:08 AM #8
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

Quote:
Originally Posted by DP_2017 View Post
I don't think so, each person experiences things differently. Just because you had similar experiences doesnt mean you have similar reactions or feelings. I'd rather talk to a uninvolved 3rd party

i'm unsure how you can find that info anyway, isn't it confidential ?
Also,
If their reactions and feelings are different from mine I would like to know what they are.
If theyíve learned something useful thatís helped them, maybe it would help me, too.
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Old 01-28-2019, 10:35 AM #9
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

Quote:
Originally Posted by susannahsays View Post
Well, it honestly sounds a bit like you want to demand answers from the other victims. While it's unfair that he wasn't brought to justice, I don't think it would be ok to approach the other victims in your search for answers about why that is. I'm not sure how you could find the other victims in a way that would circumvent confidentiality. They have a right to their privacy, even from a fellow victim.
I agree they have a right to their privacy.
Iím not demanding answers from anyone. Someone queried what goals I might have for talking with them. I just wrote down a few questions off the top of my head. Of course, I would rephrase them or not ask them at all, depending.

Confidentiality will be maintained: I still wonít know who they are unless they reach out to me.

Likely, too much time has passed and I wonít be contacted by anyone.

Last edited by precaryous; 01-28-2019 at 10:50 AM.
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Old 01-28-2019, 12:15 PM #10
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Default Re: What Do You Think?

I think that reaching out is ok. If they donít want to connect then they will decline or just ignore but if one was alsl hoping to connect then she will be grateful. I havenít been there but i could se wanting to connect with others to feel less alone
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