Shizoaffective depressive type

My typee is depressive and I am trying to cope through severe depression at this time.I am in a deep dark pit can't get out and I feel like ending it.
It is really hard to keep going so much to do the same things over and over,I don't have the energy,household chores and I live alone so if I don't do it no one will.I have to do it and keep things ticking over if not for me for my two cats,they need me,depend on me.

I don't know how to deal with this depression.I am trying meditation,hopefully that will help in the long term,also I take omega fish oils without them I'd be dead...they take the edge of the depression a little.

I am looking forward to friday I am visiting my mum and going to see a film,getting out a bit helps me not be so very very low.If I don't see anyone all week unless I get out to see people it makes me suicidal I hate to be isolated.I am an introvert but I like people too.I hope I can overcome this depressive mood....it regularly turns up especially when I am alone with nought to do.
Do any of you have suggestions on how to overcome depression and mood swings of schizoaffective disorder?

I take psych meds but even that doesn't help always. Are you seeing a pdoc or T?

I see my GP,I am on an anti psychotic I used to take anti depressants but they didn't help and made me worse,I was numb frozen inside I couldn't feel anything so I came off them.Cos anti depressants are also harmful to the physical body I don't take them.I take omega fish oils they help me a lot.I take other supplements especially vitamin D and K and C and B complex,I take kelp for my thyroid problem and other stuff that I took when I had cancer.I am anxious that the cancer will come back cos my diet hasn't been good lately.I am seeing a therapist for Complex PTSD in six weeks cos I also have that as well as Schizoaffective disorder.I have had both on and off since 1988.

How long have you had schizoaffective disorder Miguel's mom,would it help you to talk about it?Thank you for your reply.

I am trying to put a brave face on it but I am still very depressed.I lack physical energy too but am trying to keep on top of the chores and gardening.I live alone I have never had a partner I get so very lonely,I crave companionship.I can't see myself ever having someone love me,I feel that is not a single soul out there for me though they say there is someone for everyone....I haven't made it happen or just had it happen where I meet someone and form a bond of love from the beginning.I am depressed about that too.
I am not honest with others about how much depression and despair I really feel.I make an effort to sort my affairs but after 39 years of illness I want to just give up and not have to try anymore.I find life so very hard and I am always tired and lacking energy.I want to feel healthy again like others that are healthy feel but with chronic illness that isn't something I can experience again like when I was 16 and had a lot of energy and didn't tire easily.

Having three chronic physical illnesses and two mental illnesses,it is so hard to succeed in life with all the extra time and effort it takes to take care of myself it is much harder for me than for a normal healthy person.I can't take much more of the daily struggles to stay well and get everything done.I don't see a future for myself.I worry there isn't one.

Hi Marylin, I also have schizoaffective depressive type and I also am struggling a lot lately. I am caring for two children and I feel like a terrible mother because we are in survival mode at home. My living space is trashed, I am not cooking healthy meals, I barely keep up with the laundry enough to get everybody out of the house in clean clothes every day. I more often than not spend my time in bed.

I also understand your loneliness and frustration about not having a partner. I am recently divorced and would like to find someone to share life with, but at the same time, I am not healthy enough to have anything to offer someone else and am simply coping with the struggle of daily life. It is very isolating and I am sorry that you are hurting.

I cannot offer any suggestions to help you but please know that there are people who are here for you and support you.

Thanks for your reply NIX,it is awful isn't it?I am always so very tired and lacking in energy and I get so lonely, I am sorry that you feel the same,it must be much harder with two children to bring up!

Today I put my newly learnt meditation skills to work again,it does help.I use it to not dwell on negative thoughts and feelings that depress me.I just let the thoughts and feeling come and more importantly go without holding on.I am still really low and depressed but I get through it.I don't know how else to deal with it so I am doing my best.I don't have much support except one or two sentences of comfort from my niece and my narc sister helped me with a loan for my debts.I guess that is quite a bit of help better than nothing,I asked my niece to write a letter to support my benefit claim but she hasn't done it and I guess she is a student at university so is quite busy with her own stuff.I am disappointed cos it is important for me to get benefits and she hasn't bothered to help me though she says she loves and supports me but only in words I think,cos whenever I mention my fears about benefits she quickly says she is here for me and loves and supports me as if to get rid of the problem that is me.It makes me sad cos I love my niece but obviously being a young 20 year old her old auntie and her needs aren't going to stop her enjoying her life neither is she going to put herself out for me she has always been clear about that.So that is me loved and told.I am depressed about that to that she doesn't care like she pretends to.

I need to try again,make an effort to make new friends,it has been three and a half years since the last woman friendship I had ended cos she was mean to me I think I am over that now and ready to try again with new people.

I have no motivation to do anything too. Other than working, I make a goal of doing one productive thing a day -- even like emptying the dishwasher. Then I'll have something to feel a sense of accomplishment about.

I also have a dog and have no choice but to feed him and give him water and attention. That makes me feel like I've done something good in life....taking care of someone else even though I don't do a good job of taking care of myself.

It helps to talk about it as you are (some people). I am at a very low point also. Meds don't seem to be helping, seem to actually making my depression worse. Meditation helped me to relax but in my case did not help the depression. For those who have not experienced this it is hard for them to fully understand. In my case some medications drove me into a deeper depression. No easy answers, I just try to look at each new day as a exactly that a new day. I try to motivate myself to do new things that can distract me but that is hard to get into this mindset sometimes.


Best wishes

I have depressive type as well and its such a daily struggle. I had a new anti depressant, but it caused my teeth to hurt really bad so I stopped it. Will probally be put on something else when I go back to the doctor in the next couple of weeks.
I experience going into the dark hole for days so I know how you feel hun.

Well I have depressive and ansiety triggers, can't even tell who's worse. I would like to have more people in my life, but In some way I know it's impossible. I'm such a **** up I ruin all friendships I have. Unfortunately I'm a man with emotional needs, I wish I wasn't so weak when it comes to this type of issues. Just a cold bastard that goes to work and stays with his dog. The stigma is so big, that when I'm walking I notice how people comment and talk about the "crazy guy". Why are they so mean? I relate to you OP.

I know what it is to have unmet emotional needs.People and |I don't get on either they see I am a push over and take advantage of me.I have been in a family of narcissists that abused me so probably I am codependent.If you look and sound a bit different that is their cue to call you the "crazy guy",take no notice,its not as if other people are sane they are just the "normals",which is a different type of crazy but crazy nonetheless!

I was diagnosed with schizoaffective depressive type in grad school but I don't remember ever having depressive episodes. I don't know what happened--if I just blocked it out or what. My current psychiatrist thinks it was drug induced.

I currently exercise an hour a day and take a plethora of herbal and vitamin supplements. I'm not on St. John's Wort or any SSRIs.

I hope you guys are doing okay, or at least surviving. I know how hard depression can be. And honestly that thing about your niece makes ME frustrated, that she would be so superficial about your wellbeing. Man. Well good luck with that anyway.

I know FourOwls and it does hurt but I learnt with my family not to expect to come first or be a priority,same thing I suppose.My niece does love me and she was in the USA far from home and anxious about her studies when I asked her for the letter.Turns out I didn't need her help for benefits anyway.I wrote a letter of complaint which got me a second medical assessment and they are looking at their decision to refuse me benefits again,so I sorted that on my own.

My feelings of being unloved and unwanted actually stem from childhood where I was ignored by other members of our community,well those of my peers,it was as if I was invisible and didn't exist.I certainly didn't matter.I was extremely lonely.The schizoaffective disorder came about cos I got deeply depressed over eight years stuck in a job I didn't like.I was only 17 when I started and couldn't escape the situation until I was 24.My moods haven't been stable since then.

I am doing ok.I need to make friends my age.My niece does come out with me and she is good company,I understand her wanting to do her own thing and expect to see less of her as she makes a life for herself as a grown up.
I would say most of my life I was surviving but am now managing to actually enjoy stuff as well,so I am doing better than surviving.Although with the benefits situation that can change back again.