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Old 10-07-2019, 11:33 AM   #1
onlyitj
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Default Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

My wife has been recently diagnosed 3 months ago with Scitzoaffective disorder with Capgras symptoms; she was suffering from extreme paranoia when I found out, but its been going on since last 8-9 months behind my back with her friends in the neighborhood, in which she was thinking FBI or some people are trying to trap her.

1.5 months ago, I have moved to a different city with her and two small kids, so she slowly recovered from previous paranoia but now she is thinking that everyone in her family has been replaced with some imposters. She has been staring me & my 11 year old daughter and asking everyone if we are real or original people.

2 days ago, while talking to her, she strangely said, "I get these voice commands to kill you and kids sometimes", specially myself, since I am going to harm her or change her into some animal.

I am not able to sleep since, although she is under the professional care visiting the doctor every week to check on her medications; but her paranoia is not getting resolved, its just changing its forms. I have fear of my life and kids; I do love her, and wants to help her; but I don't want to do this with the cost of our lives; I am 36 years old, I will get mentally sick myself with this continuous crazy thoughts from her.

What should I do? what will the best interest for my 5 and 11 year old kids? How can I make sure, we are safe from her commands?
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Old 10-07-2019, 05:02 PM   #2
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Default Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

Hi onlyitj. welcome to Psych Central. I am sorry you are not feeling safe due to invasive thoughts present in your wife. It sounds like she is not having a grip on reality or a strong sense of wanting to keep her family safe.

Since they have a professional, you may want to reach out to them and tell them the kind of thoughts she is having. This would let them decide if she needs a med change or possibly hospitalization in the case where she is a real danger to others or herself.

If the doc does not do anything, you may want to consider a change of doctors or an ER visit if things get out of control. The police are usually a last resort, but if you and the kids are threatened, it may be needed.

If you have family that might take care of the kids maybe that would help to have them out of the front lines. Maybe sleeping in different rooms behind a secured door might help you sleep better.

These articles may be of interest
Living with Schizoaffective Disorder: Myths, Facts, and Prospects

Caring for Someone Living with Schizoaffective Disorder Bridges to Recovery

Living with Schizoaffective Disorder
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Old 10-07-2019, 05:24 PM   #3
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Smile Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

Hello onlyitj: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central. I'm sorry you find yourself to be in such a difficult situation. Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support.

One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the Partners of People & Caregivers forum. Here's a link:

https://psychcentralforums.com/partn...ivers-support/

You asked what you should do along with what will be in the best interest of your children. And how can you make sure you are safe. Unfortunately I have to say I don't think I am in a position to answer those questions. (Perhaps there will be other PC members who will feel they can.) My own thinking, with regard to this, is that what you may want to do is to talk all of this through at-length & in-depth with a mental health therapist of your own.

One thing I was unclear about is if your wife is actually being treated at this point for her mental health concerns. You mentioned her having been diagnosed. But then it sounds as though you moved to a different city. So perhaps she's not longer actively treating? If she is I would think you might want to see if you can make arrangements to consult with her service providers. (You'll likely need her permission to do so.) They are likely to be in the best position to advise you with regard to concerns such as your safety & that of your children. If your wife is not actively treating at this point in time, I would think getting her into active treatment would be imperative.

Here are links to 9 articles, from Psych Central's archives, 7 on the subject of coping with someone who has delusions plus 1 on how to convince a loved one to seek professional care & 1 on how to help a loved one who is in denial:

10 Things You Should Know About Delusions | Caregivers, Family & Friends

Coping With Your Loved One's Delusions | Caregivers, Family & Friends

8 Ways To Cope With Someone Who Has Delusions | Caregivers, Family & Friends

10 Things You Should Do With Someone Who Suffers Delusions | Caregivers, Family & Friends

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/careg...dium=popular17

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/careg...dium=popular17

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/careg...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/11-way...-denial/?all=1

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
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Old 10-08-2019, 10:31 AM   #4
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Default Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

she is been treated actively here, going on weekly visits, but the problem is that she is not totally honest with the doctor because of trust issues; she sometimes feels doctors are planning something against her, or if she will tell them everything, they might use against her. For instance, she never revealed to me that she was hearing commands and voices very strongly but now after listening to her, she finally admits that she are actively receiving commands in her own head and sometimes those includes killing me as a precaution to her. This is where I got really scared, because I can see her staring at me sometimes very strangely like she is totally occupied by something else; which is ofcourse her voices.

She thinks her daughter and son are not real sometimes, and they might be replaced by someone else; specially the people she have some terrible experiences. My daughter was also complaining to me, that she stairs at me strangely, and ask me sometimes are you my real daughter.
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Old 10-08-2019, 10:34 AM   #5
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Default Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

looks like doctor doesn't want to take risk at this point, they want to admit her to the mental care facility; I am visiting today to the doctor personally.
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Old 10-08-2019, 11:01 AM   #6
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Default Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

onlyitj I have helped a friend when they lost touch with reality and they ended up in hospital which was safest place for them.

The hospital is a place that they can try meds and keep close tabs on patients. They also have other treatment options.

I am relieved you are seeing doctor. Admitting gives them time to work with your wife to get them stable and it may just be the vacation you need to get back to some kind of normal and take care of your self care needs and the needs of your children. Hoping for the best outcome.
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Old 10-10-2019, 08:37 PM   #7
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Default Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

Withholding information about command hallucinations is not at all uncommon.

I have a long history of command hallucinations personally. If she is having them, she is not currently being adequately treated. I am not dissing her psychiatrist, but treatment has to address the commands. The reason for this is that command hallucinations can be dangerous. I don't want to frighten you any more than you already are, but it is the truth. I once did something extremely dangerous in response to a command from God. It destroyed my life. I do not want you all to go through anything like that.

Please get this information to the doctor ASAP, if you have not already. Thinking of you and wishing you the best.
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Old 10-14-2019, 09:07 AM   #8
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Default Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

This is all very new to me, these last 3 months have been devastating; I never knew these things existed up-close, since I have not seen any close relative to be suffering from mental health issues. I have a 5 years son who is also mildly autistic, I was getting in terms in taking care of that child and doing everything I can, so that he can overcome his speech impairment; now my wife is been diagnosed with this severe disorder; but it all seems connected to my wife's family genetics; her father has similar autistic behavior which always felt really weird to me, I could never hold a good conversation with him on any topic, her sister has extreme mood and paranoid behavior, which is ruining their married life in most extreme ways.

My wife has Capgras delusions as well; where she thinks many times that I, my son & daughter are not real, and their sprits have been switched with some negative people or animals; like she thinks I or my son, is either an old guy who molested her in the childhood or we sometimes are replaced with pigs.

The problem is that doctor is also confused, I took her to the office, and my wife then changed the story, that she received "hurt your husband, because he is imposter" kind of command few times a month ago, but she is okay for now. I don't know whatelse to do, I thinking she is now hiding this from me, because she is afraid of going to the hospital again.
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Old 10-14-2019, 10:12 AM   #9
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Default Re: Command Hallucinations safety with Kids

onlyitj, I am sorry to hear how disruptive all this is to your life. A lot of weight falls on your shoulders so be sure and take care of yourself.

Having an advocate for yourself and your family could really help. Here are some articles on coping with Capgras delusions
Dementia and Capgras Syndrome: Handling Behavior and Emotional Fallout

8 Ways To Cope With Someone Who Has Delusions | Caregivers, Family & Friends

Capgras and Dementia: The Imposter Syndrome

Part 1: Getting Through To Delusional Beliefs | Caregivers, Family & Friends
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