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Default Oct 20, 2019 at 07:16 AM
  #1
When should I be sharing about my diagnosis? Too soon they run away, but I found a guy I like. I don't want him to feel lied to. I tend to tell people right away, which really isn't a good idea. But waiting is hard. I told this guy the good and limited the bad. But he's going to need to know sometime, when is a good time to spill the dirt?

Right now he thinks I'm intelligent, pretty, sweet and hardworking. I am but I'm also on SSD, bipolar with psychosis, divorced 3x. He knows divorced but not 3x.

Well I'm getting good practice this time around. More attention than ever before.

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Default Oct 20, 2019 at 02:40 PM
  #2
It depends on the nature of the relationship. You don't have to tell at all, if you don't want to do so. But, if you want to live together or have a more serious relationship, then may be, you should confide in the person. I think if you are dating someone who has no clue about mental illness, that person could be in for a shock. But, if the person is also mentally ill, then confiding in that person should not be an issue. Eventually, if you do become serious, then confiding may be important. When should you confide in that person? Well, there is no good time, but. may be, you should wait until that person confides in you about that person's health issues. As a result, it all depends on what you are seeking from that person.
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Default Oct 20, 2019 at 03:33 PM
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I confided to my fiance after a month. I slid it in after he told me he had been to jail before. I figured that was a good time to spill both our baggage.

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Default Oct 20, 2019 at 03:44 PM
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I told my bf after like three dates but I didn’t say I have bipolar with psychosis so much as sometimes I hear voices and I take meds for that....people don’t like the clinical terms I don’t think. People who are going to run will run no matter how long you wait imo. Some people I told before even going on a date...never had any issues.

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Default Oct 20, 2019 at 06:16 PM
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It also depends on who you are dating. I am dating a man who has a physical disability so told him about my illness. He likes me still. I am still seeing him after two years. The other men I told who were immature or callous left me in a hurry. But, initially they seemed ok but, of course, were not. Thus, if you like someone a lot and want them to be your friend too, there is no harm in telling them and seeing their reaction. I have not made close connections with people I have not told because I feel I can't confide in them about my personal problems. With lovers who come and go though, there is no reason to divulge. I don't know what the op is seeking but in a good relationship with anybody, trust and acceptance are issues that are important.
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Default Oct 20, 2019 at 09:33 PM
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Yeah. Been through this a few times. For me, the bottom line is, it's gonna come out. It always does. The only question is, do you want to do that now, before there is a lot of investment in the relationship, or do you wait and hope they're not angry for you not having divulged earlier? I used to wait. But I've changed. I decided it's better for me to be out there with this thing than to try to sneak it in later. If she freaks, then she obviously is not the girl for me. It's worked fairly well so far.

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Default Oct 24, 2019 at 06:13 PM
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Well, I told the French man about my illness and he paused for awhile. Now, he is pursuing me again. Whatever! Some people just run away and others accept it and continue as is.
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