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RubyRae
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Default May 11, 2018 at 09:00 AM
  #1
I am very concerned about my husband.He has episodes(for lack of a better word) where he seems to lose touch with reality.In between these episodes,he seems completely fine.

Yesterday he smoked a little weed and was acting so bizarre,saying and doing such strange things that it scared the crap out of me.I was afraid maybe his weed was laced with something but the person he smoked with was completely fine.It was like the weed triggered an episode,it was more than being stoned,the things he was saying and doing reminded me of his brother when he needs his medication changed for his schizophrenia.

He has had these episodes before too,just randomly,but they have been getting worse and more often the past 6 months.He doesn't believe me when I tell him about them,he doesn't remember them.Since he doesn't believe me,he refuses to seek any kind of help.

Sometimes these episodes will last hours and other times he will randomly just say some bizarre things.Like he said once he is like Moses and he will lead the people.About 6 months ago he told my son and I that he believes he cannot be killed by being stabbed with a knife,that he believes even if someone stabbed him it could never hurt him and tried to get me to stab him to prove it.

He is really starting to scare me with these episodes.Yesterday was extremely scary and it lasted probably 4 or 5 hours.When I tried to talk to him about it afterwards he said he did not say or do all the things I say he did,that he was just tired and I confused him.I didn't confuse him though,he was clearly confused on his own.It freaked me out so much that I seriously considered calling an ambulance or something,I didn't know what to do and I didn't know how to help him.

I have major anxiety from writing this right now.His episodes trigger my PTSD so badly because I don't know what he may do when like that and I feel so helpless.

He definitely needs to seek help.But how do you convince someone to seek it when they don't remember the episodes and don't believe what you tell them?

I know nothing about psychosis.Can it come and go like that?Can things trigger it?What are some examples of psychotic episodes so that I can compare them and see if that's maybe what's going on with him?

And,what do I do?
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Default May 11, 2018 at 10:11 AM
  #2
There’s something called drug induced psychosis it can come and go....

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Default May 11, 2018 at 10:32 AM
  #3
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Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic View Post
There’s something called drug induced psychosis it can come and go....
I have read about that before.But I don't think that's what is going on.Most of the time there's no drugs involved when he has these episodes.
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Default May 11, 2018 at 06:45 PM
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This sounds like a very stressful time for you. It’s hard when people do not want to seek help when you think they have a problem.

I hesitate to suggest this, as it could potentially exacerbate things, but could you record these episodes somehow to show him later on to try to get him to realise what you are worried about? My caution arises from the fact that, if this is some kind of psychosis, drug-induced or otherwise (which aren’t always easily linked to the drug use in question because of the complicated effects that drugs have on the brain; you also may not be aware of the full extent of his drug use), this could trigger paranoia at being recorded, which he might take out on you. Also, if he were to be delusional, he could potentially explain away the footage somehow, as doctored to frame him or whatever. But it could also potentially get him to see what he is like in those moments. You’d have to weigh up the pros and cons of doing this as you’d know him best and how he is likely to respond.

Another reason that I think recording him might be beneficial, or at least having another person to witness them, is that it would better explain things to professionals. Even with confidentiality rules, you are allowed to talk to his GP about this behaviour, without his knowledge/consent if need be. The GP cannot comment on what you say with things that your husband has told them (as that would break confidentiality), and they might be resistant to giving you the appointment in the first place, but they have to listen to your concerns and put them in his medical records. They also have to keep what you say confidential from him, even redacting it if he ever requests access to those notes, if you ask them to do that.

I also wanted to talk about boundaries with you. Whilst it is understandable for you to want to help him, you need to protect yourself and your son first. If you are finding it scary to witness, your son probably is even more so. It might be worth considering applying boundaries like he cannot use drugs around either of you. Or, if it comes to it, even leave him until he gets treatment for whatever is going on. Perhaps if he realises how serious you are in your concerns, he might be willing to see a Dr for his family’s sake. I know that it’s a difficult decision to make though, both ethically in general, and because you love him. But you cannot stand by if his behaviours are causing harm to your family, whatever the reason for them may be.

I also suggest checking in with your pdoc/T, if you have them, to get support for your anxiety and PTSD whilst you are dealing with this.

I wish you and your family all the best

*Willow*
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Default May 12, 2018 at 09:43 AM
  #5
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Originally Posted by WeepingWillow23 View Post
This sounds like a very stressful time for you. It’s hard when people do not want to seek help when you think they have a problem.

I hesitate to suggest this, as it could potentially exacerbate things, but could you record these episodes somehow to show him later on to try to get him to realise what you are worried about? My caution arises from the fact that, if this is some kind of psychosis, drug-induced or otherwise (which aren’t always easily linked to the drug use in question because of the complicated effects that drugs have on the brain; you also may not be aware of the full extent of his drug use), this could trigger paranoia at being recorded, which he might take out on you. Also, if he were to be delusional, he could potentially explain away the footage somehow, as doctored to frame him or whatever. But it could also potentially get him to see what he is like in those moments. You’d have to weigh up the pros and cons of doing this as you’d know him best and how he is likely to respond.

Another reason that I think recording him might be beneficial, or at least having another person to witness them, is that it would better explain things to professionals. Even with confidentiality rules, you are allowed to talk to his GP about this behaviour, without his knowledge/consent if need be. The GP cannot comment on what you say with things that your husband has told them (as that would break confidentiality), and they might be resistant to giving you the appointment in the first place, but they have to listen to your concerns and put them in his medical records. They also have to keep what you say confidential from him, even redacting it if he ever requests access to those notes, if you ask them to do that.

I also wanted to talk about boundaries with you. Whilst it is understandable for you to want to help him, you need to protect yourself and your son first. If you are finding it scary to witness, your son probably is even more so. It might be worth considering applying boundaries like he cannot use drugs around either of you. Or, if it comes to it, even leave him until he gets treatment for whatever is going on. Perhaps if he realises how serious you are in your concerns, he might be willing to see a Dr for his family’s sake. I know that it’s a difficult decision to make though, both ethically in general, and because you love him. But you cannot stand by if his behaviours are causing harm to your family, whatever the reason for them may be.

I also suggest checking in with your pdoc/T, if you have them, to get support for your anxiety and PTSD whilst you are dealing with this.

I wish you and your family all the best

*Willow*
Thank you so much for your reply.

I think recording him is a good idea.I wish I had thought of that during this latest episode.I think saving the recording elsewhere would be a good idea because I could imagine him deleting it from my phone after seeing it.

Today I am wondering if maybe these episodes could possibly be from a medication he is taking.I think I am going to go online and get a list of all of them(I have access to his medical records)and look into each of them.I could also email his Dr if I choose to,I might actually do that.

i also want to add that my son is a young adult and therefore capable of protecting himself.He doesn't even live with us anymore.And I really don't mind my husband smoking weed,I honestly don't think it had anything to do with this.I smoke it myself too and have never reacted that way.This is something else,that much I do know.

IDK what's going on with him but I hope I can convince him to seek help.
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Default May 12, 2018 at 04:36 PM
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I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed that your son was young. It didn’t even occur to me that he could be an adult for some reason, so thank you for clarifying.

Drugs can affect people very differently, and even the same person differently over different times. You could well be right that his drug use is unrelated to whatever is going on right now for him, but...idk, I’ve seen the damage that drugs can do first hand many times. Given the fact that he has a family history of sz makes me even more concerned about drug use. But, yes, you are right, many people use drugs recreationally and have no issues with them.

I wish you both the best with this situation

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Default May 12, 2018 at 05:17 PM
  #7
I didn't take my husband seriously until he threatened to leave with our small child. Even then I just went to Gp got an antidepressant. It made me sicker. We dropped the med and the treatment. It wasn't until a new gp asked me why I wasn't on an antidepressant and I got in his face about not needing drugs that I walked out with a mood stableizer. I went to several Dr's and med before getting on an anti psychotic. It was even longer before I discovered I heard voices. A couple of My therapists had to tell me I needed an anti psychotic before even trying one.

I think you need to get a therapist. Maybe get him to see a therapist.

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Default May 15, 2018 at 07:51 PM
  #8
My husband actually went to the doctor today.She changed his meds.

I am really hoping this will make a difference.

Thanks for the replies here.
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