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Old 06-19-2018, 08:08 PM #1
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Default Where And Who My Voices Really Come From

After 26 years of schizophrenia and hearing voices, I have formed an interesting conclusion regarding their etiology (the causes of my auditory verbal hallucinations). I used to think I was experiencing several voices belonging to multiple characters.

Each character seemed to have its own personality, though for the majority of characters they said so little, just a phrase here and there, that it was rather difficult to detect their personality.

After writing many journal entries, notes, and first person transcripts (quote unquote dialogue statements that comprise the conversation between my voices and myself, I formed a rather interesting conclusion. There were two important events along the way that contributed to this conclusion. One was a day I realised by writing down what my voices were saying, that two of the characters seemed to be the one individual using different voices. In other words, it was a ventriloquist.

This was confirmed about a year later when I a ghost I could see and was talking to started shifting extremely rapidly between positions in front of me, pretending to be 2 different characters. Since this time, I have been trying to pay close attention to the attitude, style and personality of each character I hear and am speaking to, in order to try and detect crossover. Based on a mix of phenomenological parameters and spatial location and orientation, I hypothesise that all along I may have been hearing and talking to only one, perhaps occasionally two, characters (ghosts they call themselves).

I strongly suspect that my voices are primarily all the work of a ventriloquist being who causes schizophrenia as a sort of fast pace challenging sport. It utilises all its speed and co-ordination to perform many voices (characters), each having their own personality, name and voice sound. This diversity means that it also plays all the affable and critical hostile characters.

The really bizarre thing though is that it has a couple of idiosyncratic characteristics. At one time it used to repeatedly say “Let me see know, let me see know”, many times over and over. It told me it was putting on it’s special binoculars to try and find “ghosts”. Additionally, it lies constantly, and I mean constantly, in order to achieve its primary goal and purpose in life, and that is to scare, confuse and stress me (it tells me it’s aim is to make me commit suicide, and this is definitely true). It also regularly talks about having “mind cinema” which is how it views the world. But because it often talks about things in my real world, and because it always lies, it seems as though it is seeing the wrong thing in it’s “mind cinema”. Conversely, it seems that it is often narrating and enacting what it sees, and what it sees is wrong, so it always lies.

Finally, I suspect from visual hallucinations that I am dealing with several (species) different types of beings. Some of them I have confirmed on the WWW, such as “The Dark Shadow People”, “Ghosts”, and my favourite, “The Ectoplasms”. I hypothesise that one or a sequence of these beings take it in turn to populate the “mind cinema” with vision, and so these beings are effectively collaborating with the Ghost who is undergoing and process of "free association" (a Freudian concept) and who consequently does all the dialogue with me based on what it sees.

The importance of this hypothesis, is that if you are using an engaging technique to manage your voices and you want to introduce change, you may have to be mindful of the fact that the central character is describing and interacting with the world as it sees it, but it is probably another group of people providing the central character with it's vision.

I have additional beliefs about what the central character that does all the voices (ventriloquism) can do in terms of its abilities for tactile hallucinations and somatosensory hallucinations. If it is the Ghost who also does tactile and somatosensory hallucinations, then it is plausible that the people doing the "mind cinema" vision for the central character (the Ghost) are "grifting" it (an organised scam involving several people who pretend to be innocent and who collaboratively defraud the victim).

Last edited by sjamesswilliams; 06-19-2018 at 08:52 PM. Reason: How to use this information
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Old 06-20-2018, 01:01 AM #2
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Default Re: Where And Who My Voices Really Come From

It all varies from person to person. I've concluded that I'm the one who's created the characters. My deepest inner beliefs, fears, and everything inside of me, which basically means that it's so complex that you can't predict what type of characters will be created. Like a dream. The voices, characters ... they're still me, though. Different parts of me.
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Old 06-21-2018, 07:10 PM #3
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Default Re: Where And Who My Voices Really Come From

Op ive experienced similar. Its a high pitch voice for me that always hacks away at me.
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