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Old 02-25-2019, 03:24 PM #11
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I got my laundry put on the drying rack. I ate dinner. I am trying to get things done.

My motivation for the week is kinda weak. Not really wanting to go to band, but I shall go. I just need to keep my eyes on the goal. Each day is a part of a collective picture. A glass mosaic. Some shiny pieces. Some dull pieces. Some sharp. Some colourful. But today create the bigger picture. Once someone that works with glass told me she has built some sort of trust with her glass work. She seldom gets cut. Perhaps I should see it that way building this mosaic that is my life. Build it carefully and with trust and it will be beautiful.
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Old 02-25-2019, 03:34 PM #12
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I got my laundry put on the drying rack. I ate dinner. I am trying to get things done.

My motivation for the week is kinda weak. Not really wanting to go to band, but I shall go. I just need to keep my eyes on the goal. Each day is a part of a collective picture. A glass mosaic. Some shiny pieces. Some dull pieces. Some sharp. Some colourful. But today create the bigger picture. Once someone that works with glass told me she has built some sort of trust with her glass work. She seldom gets cut. Perhaps I should see it that way building this mosaic that is my life. Build it carefully and with trust and it will be beautiful.
That's Beautiful Finding Reason.
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Old 02-25-2019, 04:01 PM #13
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Seriously...my kid just text me to pick him up from the complete opposite end of town and then drive him and his friend all the way back this end and then two towns away. It’s almost an 1 & 1/2 hour round trip ride. Then go back and pick him up “later”.
Thankfully my husband agreed to go get them and bring them. I told him I’d pick him up at 8. No later. Don’t like it you can come back home with dad.
I really do not feel like leaving the house. Its super cold with crazy winds. Blah.
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Old 02-25-2019, 04:09 PM #14
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Entities take over my trippy mind. They make me say things. Beautiful things. Sometimes not beautiful things. Dark things.

But that's what life is. We get ups and downs. Mine may not be as intense as bipolar.. but it seems that way..

I woke up late today and took another Ativan last night. I'm going to tell my doctor about this tomorrow and he'll give me some insight.
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Old 02-25-2019, 06:57 PM #15
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Hey everyone. I see my psychologist next week at 6pm. I just wish he could help me more, but I don't think there is a better way to deal with my problems.
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Old 02-25-2019, 07:35 PM #16
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Hey everyone. I see my psychologist next week at 6pm. I just wish he could help me more, but I don't think there is a better way to deal with my problems.

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I’m sorry you’re feeling this way DT. I hope talking with your psychologist can help.
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Old 02-25-2019, 07:38 PM #17
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My job counselor called me. Then the therapist called me. I go see the new T on the 14th!!!
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Old 02-25-2019, 07:40 PM #18
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Originally Posted by Day Tripper View Post
Hey everyone. I see my psychologist next week at 6pm. I just wish he could help me more, but I don't think there is a better way to deal with my problems.
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Problem is you’ve got people who care about you here....I’m not sure how you view the afterlife but almost all of the religions look poorly on sui.....what if it’s the beginning of eternal pain rather than the end of it.

It sounds like you really click with this T moreso than others I can only hope it helps. What exactly are you experiencing as a nightmare right now?
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Old 02-25-2019, 07:41 PM #19
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My job counselor called me. Then the therapist called me. I go see the new T on the 14th!!!
That’s great!
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Old 02-25-2019, 08:05 PM #20
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I talked with a few people last night. They were tripping. One looked up to me and said I was a wise soul. I find trippers very cute and innocent to the world as their state of mind can be shattered with a single bad thought.

I told them that I'm not perfect. Some people hate me at times for what I say. I think in black and white.

How do people look on the bright side? It has to come at unexpected times. The dark side comes at unexpected times. It always changes. When I'm in a bad moment, I'm convinced that it will last forever. And it's proof that in good times, the good times are fake. Love is fake. life is fake.

But there's things that keep people going. They hold onto beliefs and want to hear them confirmed by others. I have to believe in myself as my state of mind is no worse or better than anyone else's.

Many dark things have happened to me. All lyrics in songs speak to people. Pictures, sounds, feelings. Overcoming suffering is the purpose of suffering. Life is suffering. Overcoming it and seeing the other side as it shines through. I can chose to ignore it as well but ignoring doesn't make things go away. So many thoughts and what should I do with them? I want to learn everything and not sleep.
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