Will I ever recover?

Its been 10 years since i'm diagnosed paranoid schizophrenia. And I have tried almost all available antipsychotics. Nothing seem to work. My "delusions" about myself being hated by this world, used as a joke, slandered, mocked, ridiculed, imitated, insulted, mobbed has yet to be proven wrong. Its hard to live with this.

Psychiatrist refer to it as persecutory delusions. But why those are delusions when it is true afterall? I had evidences and experiences to back up my beliefs that i'm persecuted. Its also definitely not delusion/hallucination when you frequently witness people/strangers insulting and mocking you from behind, just to derive some amusement from pissing you off or exploiting your vulnerabilities to hurt you.

I just cant come to terms with this BS i'm experiencing, no amount of antipsychotics will help, unless these people understand the impact of their behavior on someone else. Just asking to be treated as a proper human being like everyone else must be a tall order in this planet. I'm not even expecting to be treated like an idol. Anyway since my illness is hinging on the toxicity of the environment i'm living in, i would probably only recover once i'm no longer in the environment, else i would become misanthropic or turn into someone i once hated myself.

Hav you tried cbt for psychosis? Sometimes therapy can work where medicines fail.

I've been put on CBT many times in the past but it doesnt work out.

Was it specifically for psychosis? It’s a modified technique to deal with delusions etc. not available everywhere unfortunately.

Here’s my perspective....if you’re beyond the age of jr high it’s really unlikely that people are making fun of you to the extent you think they are. Most people are just not wanting a confrontation so they won’t do stuff like that.

Oh ok. Never really heard of CBT for psychosis. My therapist use evidence based therapy which requires me to challenge my thoughts through gathering "evidences for or against" the beliefs. Wasnt effective. Its hard to challenge the thoughts when the things i experienced are real.