Roll Call: 146

Angelique67 · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:17 PM

I'm just feeling so weird. It still freaks me out everyday, being here. There are some people here that I don't like, which I guess is par for the course. But the intensity of my feeling might not be.

If I was like this as a child (and I don't know if I was) it would explain my early lack of friends.

Dying for some pizzas. Loaded with mozzarella. Once in a blue moon they have had pizza here and wherever they got it from, it was piled with thick mozzarella. They still have me down as lactose intolerant so that reduces my luck of getting pizza further, although maybe I could order one in.

Apr 10, 2019 at 07:18 PM

I think Seroquel numbs me emotionally a bit. Before Seroquel I would go through each roll call page and comment on everything. Now I just read them but I have nothing to really add. Also, I'm having writers block. I can't seem to get passed it.

Angelique67 · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

hey angelique how're you?

Ok. Wishing more for my freedom lately. Everything seems hopeless though.

Are you ok? Are you having intrusive thoughts about the abuse you survived? That's such a lot to carry.

Erti · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:24 PM

been having orgasms in my dreams that are nonsexual in nature... i just had one right now. not sure how or why. oh my god i think it's because they took me off the paxil... i am in love right now... i need to orgasm more... it's my reason to exist.

Erti · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Ok. Wishing more for my freedom lately. Everything seems hopeless though.

Are you ok? Are you having intrusive thoughts about the abuse you survived? That's such a lot to carry.

I'm ok today. i've been sleeping a lot more. however when i'm really tired i get a sudden decrease of energy and memories pop up like no other.

Angelique67 · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

I'm ok today. i've been sleeping a lot more. however when i'm really tired i get a sudden decrease of energy and memories pop up like no other.

Oh, then I hope you will be able to rest well.

Angelique67 · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:33 PM

Over at Tapatalk Support, I didn't get a notification of this reply from them Roll Call: 146

Erti · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Oh, then I hope you will be able to rest well.

thanks angelique

i might be up for a while tho because of the naps i've been taking today.

Desoxyn · Apr 10, 2019 at 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Day Tripper

I think Seroquel numbs me emotionally a bit. Before Seroquel I would go through each roll call page and comment on everything. Now I just read them but I have nothing to really add. Also, I'm having writers block. I can't seem to get passed it.

I think my thoughts are just numbed in general. My emotions are numbed because of environment. At the end of the injection, I usually feel positive symptoms but my injection is tomorrow and I feel zero positive symptoms even on Adderall.

I'm trying to write an essay on religion but I don't even know where to begin. I haven't written anything yet because my mind is blank.

newtus · Apr 10, 2019 at 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Over at Tapatalk Support, I didn't get a notification of this reply from them Roll Call: 146

I hate when they said that. Cuz they dont really do anything. They just say that.

Sometimes psychotic · Apr 10, 2019 at 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Day Tripper

I think Seroquel numbs me emotionally a bit. Before Seroquel I would go through each roll call page and comment on everything. Now I just read them but I have nothing to really add. Also, I'm having writers block. I can't seem to get passed it.

Sorry to hear DT...

ofthevalley · Apr 10, 2019 at 08:14 PM

sup

Hope everyone that’s struggling is feeling better soo.
I’m doing okay. I’m good mentally. Physically I’m a disaster. Sinuses, head, stomach...blah.
Also weirded out by my wrist. My hand is okay but the wrist itself is so weak and strange. I don’t have to anymore but I’m really only comfortable when it’s in the brace...it’s like I’m afraid of it. It doesn’t hurt but I’m hesitant to use it. It’s really strange. I’ve had a couple relatively big surgeries compared to this and god know I’ve felt my fair share of pain...I don’t get it.
Must be getting wimpy with age.

Desoxyn · Apr 10, 2019 at 08:30 PM

I feel like my life could turn for the best or for the worst. I'm stuck in the middle right now where everything is just a potential good or bad place.

It's cold and raining. I love rain.

Right now I feel like doing this essay is a chore. I don't want to do it. I'm not taking any courses this summer. I'm going to work for 4 months for an extra 3600 dollars. Then do courses in September and in the winter.

So yeah that's where my summer is going. I want to work 2 days a week so I'll have 5 days a week to heal because I'm really in need of spiritual healing. My mind feels like it is complete trash and so is my life. I'll have the summer to use free time to my advantage to grow as a person stress free. Because I'm in a lot of stress and everything feels disturbing to me, screwed up and weird.

Well at least I wrote this about my thoughts but it was hard..

Edit: I feel like I'm in a dark place that only I can overcome with my mind

Erti · Apr 10, 2019 at 08:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I feel like my life could turn for the best or for the worst. I'm stuck in the middle right now where everything is just a potential good or bad place.

It's cold and raining. I love rain.

Right now I feel like doing this essay is a chore. I don't want to do it. I'm not taking any courses this summer. I'm going to work for 4 months for an extra 3600 dollars. Then do courses in September and in the winter.

So yeah that's where my summer is going. I want to work 2 days a week so I'll have 5 days a week to heal because I'm really in need of spiritual healing. My mind feels like it is complete trash and so is my life. I'll have the summer to use free time to my advantage to grow as a person stress free. Because I'm in a lot of stress and everything feels disturbing to me, screwed up and weird.

Well at least I wrote this about my thoughts but it was hard..

Edit: I feel like I'm in a dark place that only I can overcome with my mind

You're a really smart guy... hopefully you can get back into the ride of things after a summer break. you can do many things. you're a good person too. don't let your mind tell you otherwise.

Desoxyn · Apr 10, 2019 at 09:27 PM

I'm gonna take my seroquel now at 8:30pm and sleep. This is the earliest that I'm going to sleep in over a year.

Erti · Apr 10, 2019 at 09:32 PM

goodnight tweaky

Erti · Apr 10, 2019 at 10:40 PM

I'm pissed... my mom comes home turns tv to supernatural shows knowing full well that it triggers **** for me... this his ********.

Angelique67 · Apr 10, 2019 at 11:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

thanks angelique

i might be up for a while tho because of the naps i've been taking today.

Me too, I slept until afternoon today. Hope you get plenty of sleep.

Angelique67 · Apr 10, 2019 at 11:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

I hate when they said that. Cuz they dont really do anything. They just say that.

Yes, we shall see whether they do or not. I wish I could have my computer here.

Erti · Apr 10, 2019 at 11:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Me too, I slept until afternoon today. Hope you get plenty of sleep.

I got an appointment with the regular doctor at 10:15 am this morning. hopefully i wake up in time before my case manager picks me up and calls me.

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Roll Call: 146

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Anonymous40796 Guest Posts: n/a	Apr 10, 2019 at 07:18 PM #242 I think Seroquel numbs me emotionally a bit. Before Seroquel I would go through each roll call page and comment on everything. Now I just read them but I have nothing to really add. Also, I'm having writers block. I can't seem to get passed it.
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Erti Princess Tutu Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Nowhere Posts: 7,912 12 2,894 hugs given	Apr 10, 2019 at 07:24 PM #244 been having orgasms in my dreams that are nonsexual in nature... i just had one right now. not sure how or why. oh my god i think it's because they took me off the paxil... i am in love right now... i need to orgasm more... it's my reason to exist.
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Angelique67 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Oct 2014 Location: USA Posts: 22,115 (SuperPoster!) 9	Apr 10, 2019 at 07:33 PM #247 Over at Tapatalk Support, I didn't get a notification of this reply from them
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,986 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,912 hugs given	Apr 10, 2019 at 09:27 PM #255 I'm gonna take my seroquel now at 8:30pm and sleep. This is the earliest that I'm going to sleep in over a year.
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Erti Princess Tutu Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Nowhere Posts: 7,912 12 2,894 hugs given	Apr 10, 2019 at 09:32 PM #256 goodnight tweaky
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Erti Princess Tutu Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Nowhere Posts: 7,912 12 2,894 hugs given	Apr 10, 2019 at 10:40 PM #257 I'm pissed... my mom comes home turns tv to supernatural shows knowing full well that it triggers ** for me... this his ******.
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