Roll Call 148

Doc put me on risperdal and cogentin. So far it’s making me really tired. It’s working ok on voices and delusions. They’re still there but less frequently and I can reason my way out of them.

👋
Had a busy day. Got the kids to school, worked, went to city hall in my fil’s city, went to Walmart, saw my guy and his wife, worked, brought rok to the vet, then went to cvs , cumbys, my fil’s house, and Walmart again. Now I’m cooking dinner.
I slept terrible again last night. About 3 & 1/2 hours. It’s been a couple nights now, if it doesn’t get better in a couple days I’ll start the ambien again.
Hope everyone is having a good day.

If I really have autism and not schizophrenia, I'm going to Peru to drink Ayahuasca every day for a week..

It would be nice to get some sleep -_- What a pain in the *** this is

All yall cant sleep? I take benadryl to sleep. Like benadryl as in the sleep aid
Over the counter sleep aid from walmart.

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

I have benadryl but it doesn't really help me. I take seroquel at night

Oh that's crazy. I take 100mg. I'm sorry bb.

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Benadryl isn’t enough for me most nights but I’ll try it tonight before redorting to ambien.
Thanks!

Hey everyone. I hope all of you are doing okay. My day was a mix. I had to train the new guy some of the fundamentals. Its going to take a long time for him to get the hang of it. I have never had so much trouble training a new guy before. The boss said we'd all get to train him, but he wasn't picking up what I was laying down at all. I had to work late, a 10 hour day because I spent most of it trying to create good habits for the new kid. At my old job I was always the one to train because of my patience.

Ordered a copy of my book so I can go over it on paper. I cleaned up chapter 3 and 4 a lot, plus Grammarly was a big help, thanks to my niece (sister's daughter) My nieces are really cool. I have I have 7 nieces lol isn't that crazy? My brother had a vasectomy and then he got his wife pregnant with TWINS (both girls). So he has 6 kids. Can you imagine that? The wife is always taking energy drinks to keep up with them.

Benadryl worked for me for 4 months then I built a tolerance and I went to **** because of no sleep. I'm actually taking a different antihistamine because the Benadryl doesn't do anything for me. Seroquil is no longer working ofr me either, nor is my benzo Restoril. I'm living on the absolute edge, but I see my pdoc Friday.

Good luck DT!
There’s a reason sleep deprivation is used as torture.

tired but i want to stay up all night

You should try to take advantage of being sleepy. Especially since you’ve been symptomatic.

Here u guys go

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Yeah I know. I slept pretty much all day these past 3/4 days so I guess I just want some awake time to enjoy myself

I got a headache

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Can't sleep..

I need Xyrem to sleep..

I really need to be in a better state of mind. I love when I'm places that are away from home. I have the opposite of homesick. I want to go somewhere.

I'm going to meditate by listening to guided meditation or alan watts cuz I can't sleep.

It feels like I can't truly appreciate what I have. Like something is bugging me and my focus is really bad. I feel foggy headed.

The sun will be rising in an hour so I'll be meditating when the sun comes up =P

I think that's called cabin fever.

Cabin fever.. It's like my mind is so used to being in the same state that I want to escape from it..

I was basically locked in a basement for a few years. I had nowhere to go, nothing to do, no place to be.. My mom neglected me for her bf.. Now I'm almost 23 and can't escape into the real world.. I'm stuck in my room again. Would anyone blame me for wanting to constantly escape?

Meditation, cigarettes, drugs.. I have no guidance from anyone. All they say is "You're young. Everyone that is young feels like they don't know what to do about their future". That doesn't help. I need a list of things because all I do constantly is talk to myself. All I have is my thoughts.

Yknow why they say people that talk to themselves are crazy? Because when you talk to yourself constantly, you're just thinking in your own internal symbols, losing touch with reality. So many people lose touch with reality. Meditation helps bring you back.

Meditation is not thinking and just listening to just completely be aware to realize that there is no such thing as the future. No past. Time is now.

The winter was hard. Short days. Long nights. I'm happy that the sun is rising. I do feel alone most of the time. It's good to feel alone because that means that I'm not schizoid. Those people create their own realities.

Reality is juicing an orange. It is cutting someone off in a car. But what's the point of even typing my thoughts down? They don't mean anything. I constantly think like this every waking moment. I have forever trip. Hallucinatory Persisting Perception Disorder.

I see my therapist today in the afternoon. I don't even know what to say. Because there's so many things that I can say and so many things that I can't because I don't know how.