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Junior Member
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Austria
Posts: 18
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#1
First of all, I don't have schizophrenia. But the way my mind works is rather unsettling and I'm not sure how to describe it. I'm not sure whether it can be called hallucinations, but it might be that. Anyway, I'm not sure this is the right forum to post this in, so please move it if it's not - I couldn't find anything more appropriate.
Anyway. I'm on Fluoxetine, or Prozac, and I feel like these meds are messing with my mind. Without them, my anxiety becomes unbearable, but I feel these meds mess with my memories and perception in a way it's beyond unsettling. I remember something from five seconds ago vividly and precisely - only to discover those memories are entirely wrong. I try to think about it again, and suddenly the clear memories are fuzzy. I no longer remember it clearly. Which makes sense, given the thing I just thought to remember was false, but how was I so sure? How did it feel so real? Today a car passed me, driving up to an intersection where my house is located. The parking spot to our house is also located there. The car brakes, and - at that moment - I saw the car park in our spot, only noticing there it was my dad that passed me. Though he did not get out of the car. As I approached it, he suddenly came out of the house. No driver in the car. He said he'd been home for the past 30 minutes. I vividly remembered just seeing the car park there, but that couldn't be. I felt like I had just encountered a glitch in the matrix - or rather, I felt nothing really. I feel like I should've panicked, but I didn't. Maybe because these clear memories I thought I had were no longer there. It felt like it was the strangest thing I ever encountered, yet just minutes later it already began feeling more normal since I no longer had these clear memories. Long story short, I feel like sometimes my brain just stops paying attention to the real world and fabricates its own reality for a few seconds, but begins throwing out that false memory as soon as you try to think back on it. I'm not sure how to feel about this. I feel like this can be classified as hallucinations and it's incredibly unnerving and unsettling. I don't remember having had these encounters when I didn't take the medicine yet. Some other info that might be worth mentioning that might relate to this: - Sometimes I hear very subtle sounds, of which I'm not sure whether they are really there or not. - I had exploding head syndrome for a few months in the past, though it has stopped. I took the most medicine during that period. - I have already witnessed bright flashes at night that weren't there, though this was rather rare. - Often I find it very hard to focus. I don't give any deeper meaning to these occurrences myself, though it feels like my mind thinks reality is being warped itself (this might be related to my OCD). I don't feel like I'm going crazy, but I find this so unnerving and I'm not sure what to do. |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since May 2013
Location: Chicago
Posts: 26,409
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#2
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Junior Member
Member Since Jun 2019
Location: Morocco
Posts: 23
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#3
A hallucination looks almost real . It can be visual or auditory. But it only last for brief periode of time.
I have experienced visual hallucinations when i was psychotic. |
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: USA
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#4
Thank you, SunriseCoco. This is one of the most intelligent & interesting explanations of one's thinking & experience that I have ever heard. So much I want to say! My goodness!
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