Roll Call 156

Atypical_Disaster · Nov 19, 2019 at 05:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Yep, me, bluebird and Angelique made legendary wise elder like last week.....

Most impressive. I remember when you showed up around here and got broken in by my random word salad and everyone else’s provocative paranoia ... oh, and cat pics ... a lot of cat pics ... Hahahahaha.

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 19, 2019 at 05:50 PM

I decided on some melted butter for the dry dough...it seems right now but hopefully it will bake ok....

Blue_Bird · Nov 19, 2019 at 06:07 PM

SP, I was coloring a polar bear Christmas page today

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 19, 2019 at 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

SP, I was coloring a polar bear Christmas page today

Nice, do you have a pic?

Blue_Bird · Nov 19, 2019 at 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Nice, do you have a pic?

Not right now, but I can get one when I'm finished with it

Desoxyn · Nov 19, 2019 at 06:50 PM

Had nice day skiing. Going skiing again tomorrow. Supposed to dump snow tonight and then be sunny in the morning.

My moms friend couldn't come with us cuz she's too busy doing cocaine.

Poor soul..

Blue_Bird · Nov 19, 2019 at 07:18 PM

I have no motivation to draw lately

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 19, 2019 at 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I have no motivation to draw lately

It comes and goes for me usually when I’m having a minor mood flux.....

Blue_Bird · Nov 19, 2019 at 07:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

It comes and goes for me usually when I’m having a minor mood flux.....

Same here, I did sauté mushrooms and onions today, make cookies, and watch a movie and color though

Desoxyn · Nov 19, 2019 at 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

mushrooms

I'm thinking of trying the ten different types of nootropic mushrooms. I can't just only have a love for psilocybin ones..

Desoxyn · Nov 19, 2019 at 08:03 PM

I think of drawing but I don't have paper that isn't lined and no good pencil.

Also there's so many choices. And I prioritize my time too much.

I feel like I don't have time to meditate even.

A master once said "Do you have time to breathe??? That's all you gotta do.."

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 19, 2019 at 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I think of drawing but I don't have paper that isn't lined and no good pencil.

Also there's so many choices. And I prioritize my time too much.

I feel like I don't have time to meditate even.

A master once said "Do you have time to breathe??? That's all you gotta do.."

There are definitely walking meditations...maybe get some art supplies for a down day?

Desoxyn · Nov 19, 2019 at 08:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

There are definitely walking meditations...maybe get some art supplies for a down day?

Yessssss for a down day! Cuz I'm so hard on myself when I'm down.. I can just draw instead...

Desoxyn · Nov 19, 2019 at 08:14 PM

But also I have to work on the problem of when I'm down like "I'll TAKE x to feel better" instead of "I'll DO x to feel better"...

Desoxyn · Nov 20, 2019 at 12:02 AM

Feeling a bit of derealization or whatever it is. I've had it for about two days now. It's not so intense like last year where I'd immediately get a panic attack.

Ketamine made it worse on my last dose, psilacetin did at the end of 5mg, and a candy flip also caused it before.

I wonder if my Invega injection is on Friday (Then that might be why). I wonder if I take a 5mg olanzepine then I'll feel better.

But I'm going to take 100mg Seroquel tonight instead of 50mg (My psychiatrist says I can take anywhere from 25-100mg).

At first I thought derealization was a form of psychosis, then I was told it was panic attacks (But it just caused panic attacks). Now I find out that it's a completely different thing.. A form of dissociation..

But I'll try not to think too much about it. I believe I'm delaying any symptoms of psychosis by being in a meditative state of not thinking about it until it all builds up. Is that possible? Idk..

God I'm a very aware of myself nut

Desoxyn · Nov 20, 2019 at 12:04 AM

Also I realize sometimes that I'm talking when I'm talking to people in a conversation (Like being really aware of it). It's really weird. I'm not going to think about it anymore or the jinx will continue. This is the last time I'll mention it unless it continues...

Atypical_Disaster · Nov 20, 2019 at 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

Also I realize sometimes that I'm talking when I'm talking to people in a conversation (Like being really aware of it). It's really weird. I'm not going to think about it anymore or the jinx will continue. This is the last time I'll mention it unless it continues...

AAAAHHHHHH ... this happens to me too. It is bizarre as ****.

I also find that I realize I am breathing while I am breathing ... and it is creepy because ... it is actually an odd sensation when you are consciously aware of it happening ... AAAHHH WTF brain ... STAHP IT ... It is VERY weird.

Angelique67 · Nov 20, 2019 at 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster

AAAAHHHHHH ... this happens to me too. It is bizarre as ****.

I also find that I realize I am breathing while I am breathing ... and it is creepy because ... it is actually an odd sensation when you are consciously aware of it happening ... AAAHHH WTF brain ... STAHP IT ... It is VERY weird.

Yes! I hate when I become aware of my breathing. I have body anxiety or something.

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 20, 2019 at 12:01 PM

I’m really disappointed in this gingerbread recipe....the frosting was so thick I had to add more lemon and even then it wasn’t piping well. I just did a few bears then gave up, there was no way to make them all white or even stylish. Plus I think that even though I like the spices my stomach is reacting poorly. I’m thinking of tossing them all.

Desoxyn · Nov 20, 2019 at 12:47 PM

Feel really good this morning. Going skiing.

I feel powehful! Focused, awake, no dissociation.. little hypomania (Like always), zero psychosis (No schizo), talkative...

No tiredness from the 100mg seroquel.

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Roll Call 156

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Sometimes psychotic Legendary Wise Elder Member Since May 2013 Location: Chicago Posts: 26,409 (SuperPoster!) 10 22.8k hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 05:50 PM #742 I decided on some melted butter for the dry dough...it seems right now but hopefully it will bake ok.... __________________ Hugs!
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,741 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 06:07 PM #743 SP, I was coloring a polar bear Christmas page today __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,986 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,912 hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 06:50 PM #746 Had nice day skiing. Going skiing again tomorrow. Supposed to dump snow tonight and then be sunny in the morning. My moms friend couldn't come with us cuz she's too busy doing cocaine. Poor soul..
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,741 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 07:18 PM #747 I have no motivation to draw lately __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,986 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,912 hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 08:03 PM #751 I think of drawing but I don't have paper that isn't lined and no good pencil. Also there's so many choices. And I prioritize my time too much. I feel like I don't have time to meditate even. A master once said "Do you have time to breathe??? That's all you gotta do.."
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,986 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,912 hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 08:14 PM #754 But also I have to work on the problem of when I'm down like "I'll TAKE x to feel better" instead of "I'll DO x to feel better"...
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,986 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,912 hugs given	Nov 20, 2019 at 12:04 AM #756 Also I realize sometimes that I'm talking when I'm talking to people in a conversation (Like being really aware of it). It's really weird. I'm not going to think about it anymore or the jinx will continue. This is the last time I'll mention it unless it continues...
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,986 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,912 hugs given	Nov 20, 2019 at 12:47 PM #760 Feel really good this morning. Going skiing. I feel powehful! Focused, awake, no dissociation.. little hypomania (Like always), zero psychosis (No schizo), talkative... No tiredness from the 100mg seroquel.
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