Roll Call 161!

newtus · Feb 28, 2020 at 06:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

I don’t feel well at all.

Ever since the work stuff, I been having more paranoia and my anxiety is through the roof.

I’ve had 2 really bad panic attacks in the past 2 days

Desoxyn · Feb 28, 2020 at 06:48 PM

I brought my job applications downtown and went to apply to a place but it was renovating and closed. I walked home without applying to other jobs because I'm scared to apply and sell myself. I'll try again tomorrow maybe.

I took some drugs and meds and now I feel sedated so I drank a coffee.

When my dad comes to visit, we're going to go to the bank so I can open up a tax free savings account for investing cuz I'm looking up coronavirus battered stocks to buy.

Angelique67 · Feb 28, 2020 at 06:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

I’ve had 2 really bad panic attacks in the past 2 days

Angelique67 · Feb 28, 2020 at 06:54 PM

My paranoia is higher too. I'm wondering if my friend knows I have no phone service and just doesn't care.

This cabin fever is exhausting and I keep sleeping all day.

Job 30 26 · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:06 PM

Positive: I had another easy day and it's Friday, looks like I have at least a few days off ahead of me. Still watching The Witcher on Netflix. Also Altered Carbon Season 2 is finally out. Another show I can binge while on my lunch breaks :P

Negative: I had a dark cloud over me the entire day. I'm fuming to be honest because my dr's office is showing gross incompetence regarding on calling in prescriptions. I am going to have to call them for the 5th time this week and pray they have a nurse or doctor on staff or else I will start to go through withdrawal from having no Trileptal.

In other news, I see my pdoc Tuesday because I haven't seen her since july apparently. I'm going to fine tune my meds a bit, lower the Geodon from 160 to 120mgs, wean off the Restoril slowly so it's just a PRN. Ask for some info on Remeron and weight gain. The Trileptal has been a success though.

Desoxyn · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Job 30 26

, wean off the Restoril slowly so it's just a PRN. Ask for some info on Remeron and weight gain.

I think a lot of my problem is that I have a low tolerance to novelty. I do one thing and achieve a small thing and I'm like "Yessss.. I've achieved something.. Now I can listen to music (Or something)"..

After 12 hours, I'm like "I did enough today.. Time to sleep".. But I need to stop doing that.. I decided to stay up for 14-15 hours so 2-3 extra hours when I have to be awake and live life.. Which I don't feel like doing.. I'd rather dream.. My dreams are way more interesting because I don't control them, have no anxiety, don't have to even move..

Getting up in the morning is hard because I'm half comatose when I wake up especially if I went to bed at like 4am.. I only have to wake up in the morning 2-3 days a week which is when I'm taking zopiclone the night before.

I'm afraid to take the Remeron but I think it was the fish oil that was giving me heart palpitations idk.. I stopped taking fish oil and I have no heart palpitations anymore..

But yeah it's waaaay better to take temazepam as PRN. It's gonna be a rough road for you to withdraw from it but once you do, PRN is lovely 2-3 times a week and when you don't take it, just stay up a few hours later every night and by the nights after those nights, you'll be more tired and will sleep earlier...

It involves mathematics and E=MC2!

Blue_Bird · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:32 PM

Finally able to focus enough to read. My focus has been so bad the past week

Job 30 26 · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I think a lot of my problem is that I have a low tolerance to novelty. I do one thing and achieve a small thing and I'm like "Yessss.. I've achieved something.. Now I can listen to music (Or something)"..
!

Frankly, im surprised I can get a buzz from 3 12oz beers still. I'm going to ask to cut the Remeron to 15mg also (its 30mgs now.) My mental health is as good as it's ever going to be now, unless they make some huge break throughs, which isn't going to happen im convinced. As long as I can write, that's all that matters to me.

Blue_Bird · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:38 PM

I’m glad the trileptal is working for you Job, I’ve been on it a few years now and it’s been the best mood stabilizer I’ve taken

Desoxyn · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Job 30 26

Frankly, im surprised I can get a buzz from 3 12oz beers still. I'm going to ask to cut the Remeron to 15mg also (its 30mgs now.) My mental health is as good as it's ever going to be now, unless they make some huge break throughs, which isn't going to happen im convinced. As long as I can write, that's all that matters to me.

Yeah it's weird how we can still write normally.

newtus · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Finally able to focus enough to read. My focus has been so bad the past week

Wanted to say I’m starting that dose of vray tomorrow.

newtus · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:42 PM

Idk why people take drugs. Like street drugs. Being completely sober is the most scary and eye-opening thing known to man. Almost everybody drinks or drugs or smokes cigs or something.

Blue_Bird · Feb 28, 2020 at 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

Wanted to say I’m starting that dose of vray tomorrow.

Hope it helps you!

Desoxyn · Feb 28, 2020 at 08:26 PM

"For better or worse, the areas that Fives explore do not depend on social validation; indeed, if others agree with their ideas too readily, Fives tend to fear that their ideas might be too conventional. History is full of famous Fives who overturned accepted ways of understanding or doing things (Darwin, Einstein, Nietzsche). Many more Fives, however, have become lost in the byzantine complexities of their own thought processes, becoming merely eccentric and socially isolated."

"Fives are alert, insightful, and curious. They are able to concentrate and focus on developing complex ideas and skills. Independent, innovative, and inventive, they can also become preoccupied with their thoughts and imaginary constructs. They become detached, yet high-strung and intense. They typically have problems with eccentricity, nihilism, and isolation. At their Best: visionary pioneers, often ahead of their time, and able to see the world in an entirely new way."

Blue_Bird · Feb 28, 2020 at 08:30 PM

I feel weird

Blue_Bird · Feb 28, 2020 at 08:32 PM

It’s only been one day of the decrease in Paxil and abilify

I’m worried this is going to be one long and rough transition , I probably should have just agreed to do it in the hospital

Sometimes psychotic · Feb 28, 2020 at 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

It’s only been one day of the decrease in Paxil and abilify

I’m worried this is going to be one long and rough transition , I probably should have just agreed to do it in the hospital

I hope it turns out ok.....

Desoxyn · Feb 28, 2020 at 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

Idk why people take drugs. Like street drugs. Being completely sober is the most scary and eye-opening thing known to man. Almost everybody drinks or drugs or smokes cigs or something.

I think drugs and sobriety are the same thing

Desoxyn · Feb 28, 2020 at 08:54 PM

I don't think I've ever taken a drug before. It's just one big drug.

newtus · Feb 28, 2020 at 09:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I think drugs and sobriety are the same thing

That’s interesting. I like that theory.

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Roll Call 161!

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Angelique67 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Oct 2014 Location: USA Posts: 22,112 (SuperPoster!) 9	Feb 28, 2020 at 06:54 PM #904 My paranoia is higher too. I'm wondering if my friend knows I have no phone service and just doesn't care. This cabin fever is exhausting and I keep sleeping all day.
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,722 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Feb 28, 2020 at 07:32 PM #907 Finally able to focus enough to read. My focus has been so bad the past week __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,722 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Feb 28, 2020 at 07:38 PM #909 I’m glad the trileptal is working for you Job, I’ve been on it a few years now and it’s been the best mood stabilizer I’ve taken __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,722 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Feb 28, 2020 at 08:30 PM #915 I feel weird __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,979 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,908 hugs given	Feb 28, 2020 at 08:54 PM #919 I don't think I've ever taken a drug before. It's just one big drug.
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