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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 08:21 PM
  #21
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I understand. I am here if u ever want to talk. Especially on the weekends.

The Coronavirus situation is triggering my delusions and hallucinations. I was doing well on the 3mg VRAYLAR until like yesterday.

This is just a horrible situation all around.

I ordered like 30 items on instacart just now. 27 of them not in stock. Oh well.
Thank you, I appreciate that. I’m here to talk always too if you need too.

Sorry you’re struggling with delusions and hallucinations again

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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 08:21 PM
  #22
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Thank you, I appreciate that. I’m here to talk always too if you need too.


Sorry you’re struggling with delusions and hallucinations again


Thank you. And it’s not bad right now. Not yet anyway.

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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 08:49 PM
  #23
God I saw "Heart rate: 215bpm" recorded on my watch at 1pm today.

I thought to myself "OMG" then my heart rate went up to 96bpm.. I started to panic..

Then I realize, "That's impossible!!" cuz I was awake at that time and didn't feel it..

Must have been a wrong reading....
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 08:53 PM
  #24
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One of my friends on Twitter is sui. She’s deleting her account. She says between depression and COVID stuff, she can’t deal with anything right now.

I knew stuff like this was gonna happen. I wonder if there will be a rise in sui’s over this whole ordeal.
I knew there would be a rise in suicides but I didn't say it cuz I thought that no one would believe me..

My intuition can only be so crazy until it goes uncommunicatable.. It's like writing a poem or song.. It's not that meaningful to the person writing it and then when you listen to lyrics or read a poem that you could have written, you're like "wow"..

Just food for thought...
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 09:03 PM
  #25
Eh we’re all gonna die some how. Only way I’m leaving this ***** is suicide..
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 09:06 PM
  #26
Does anyone else feel like their psychiatrists/doctors think that problems with mental health aren't as important now because of the virus and economy?

For myself, I've been just putting off talking to my doctor about meds and talking about my general wellbeing because everyone is going through a lot with job loss, staying inside, fear of the government like martial law and the virus, money, family, etc..

Maybe I'm thinking of this the wrong way. Like I don't matter. And I notice that other people realize that they don't matter.

I suggest that people talk about it on social media. That mental health doesn't get weaker because of the economy.. Like I mean the government makes cuts to mental health workers because of the lack of money..

And mental health can be bad because of the economy and people not being happy with their jobs, etc..

Then we find out that shrooms and ketamine help with depression and MDMA helps with PTSD... Government made them illegal.. Cuz they make people think about existence.. Especially weed... It makes me think that now all these substances are becoming legal, martial law will come into effect..

Most of me thinks that the virus is more serious than we think... I'd just like to be optimistic about it all.. But there's a small paranoid part of me that clings to what the psychedelics told me.. But they didn't really tell me what I already don't know.. Something deep in our egos and souls about the paradox.. Which a lot of people don't seem to get because they can be atheists or follow cults..

I should just create art.. But I don't know how in this environment.. It's what I'd love to do before I lose my intelligence and creativity... The little bit that I have left =P
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 09:07 PM
  #27
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Eh we’re all gonna die some how. Only way I’m leaving this ***** is suicide..
No! Make art! It's all we must do.. What you wrote is a good rap lyric...
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 09:12 PM
  #28
I just want to know everything about everything.. But in order to do that, I have to focus on one thing, learn about that thing, and then move onto another thing..

But I can't... My mind is way too open.. So open that I think it's broken.. Yet so aware of everything, taking it all into consideration.. Never judgemental or biased much..

So I realize that everything is perfect the way it is. Narcissistic people are perfect. They're one with themselves, going somewhere.. changing with what they're holding onto..
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 09:13 PM
  #29
I just wanna be ok....

If you lost every part of yourself
If you left your heart on a lonely Avenue
It will only be a matter of time before your
Like comes through for you.
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 11:56 PM
  #30
Trigger negative vibes

Possible trigger:

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 12:01 AM
  #31
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Trigger negative vibes


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I’m sorry max. In that instance I’d personally hole myself in my room! At least til they’re gone.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 12:20 AM
  #32
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I’m sorry max. In that instance I’d personally hole myself in my room! At least til they’re gone.
Thanks, yeah that’s what I am doing.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 08:58 AM
  #33
Heyyyyy all

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 09:12 AM
  #34
Tried to sleep in a bit. Watching My 600lb Life. Then I’m going to try to exercise. Can’t go to the gym but I have some light weights at home along with a BOB (human shaped punching bag) and a stationary bike.
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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 10:04 AM
  #35
Had another panic attack. It’s weird, I didn’t feel that anxious consciously but my body just started panicking.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 11:49 AM
  #36
So I did some shamanism last night.....it really calmed me down on this corona thing.....I think it’s because it feels like you’re doing something. I can see how people get calmed by praying etc.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 11:52 AM
  #37
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So I did some shamanism last night.....it really calmed me down on this corona thing.....I think it’s because it feels like you’re doing something. I can see how people get calmed by praying etc.


For me it’s more than just doing something. My faith is pretty strong. So being able to put my fears onto something bigger than me and onto something that heals some of my fears is what brings me peace. I don’t do it enough tho. I forget a lot because it’s not habitual.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 11:52 AM
  #38
Just put in my first book proposal to a publisher today.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 11:57 AM
  #39
My head feels hot but my temp is 98.5 idk I’m scared

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 02:11 PM
  #40
So my mom offered to buy us groceries. She said it was coming on the 2nd which is a Thursday. She said I HAVE to be home. I said well you know I work on thursdays. I can’t just take time off to be at home for a delivery. I can’t do that. I have a contract with this company to work when they need me. I said “i wish u would’ve asked me about a certain date beforehand”. And she goes “EXCUSE ME...I’m trying to help you”. So I got off the phone. I texted to her to not offer me help if it’s gonna be like this.

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