Roll Call 175

I live with some of the biggest pot heads in my life. I don't smoke everyday... like snoop dogg

Doc told me not to smoke weed because "it'll worsen [my] schizophrenia"... I stopped three or so weeks ago and if anything my mental state has worsened with more anxiety and mood swings so idk how much I believe him.

I’ve never tried weed. My doctor says it’s probably not a good idea to start.

I’ve tried weed a handful of times in my life and it doesn’t help me. Makes things worse. I have severe anxiety as it is. CBD flower on the other hand is decent. Helps without the high you get with weed. I don’t do it anymore tho.

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

The strain that I'm on is 6% THC and 10% CBD. I smoke enough to feel as if it's like a benzo except it doesn't make me tired - But I don't feel high..

Hopefully nothing bad happens later today from smoking it. If I get dp/dr, I won't smoke it again.

Welp found out my neighbor is a sex offender and lives by us who when you look him up is at a different address... we're by an elementary school. Time to report to the police. No wonder he was creepy. He set off lots of creep vibes... thing is... it's probably good that the kids aren't here because our ****ing neighbor is a pedophile.

Omg it’s 6am. I spent so many hours tonight (middle of the night) playing my switch.

And oh shyt. I just realized I have Mysophobia aka germaphobia and OCD.

I have wondered why for yearrrrs why I get extremely anxious using public restrooms etc. I’ve been in some a s $ nasty bathrooms through my life and they still haunt me to this day.

That’s like another reason I don’t shower or I’ll hold in my needing to use the bathroom. I feel like our toilet and bathroom is so beyond dirty. I get extremely anxious using the bathroom. But I’m deathly afraid to clean it. I just don’t go in there. I’ll use the downstairs bathroom sometimes. And fiancé is not a clean person in terms of keeping the house clean. He showers everyday etc and takes good care of himself tho. So thankful. If I wash my hands and it accidentally touch the sink head or something other than the towel or *nothing* I re-wash and wash again and again.

I was wondering wtf was wrong with me cuz I keep telling people that thing about being afraid of the toilet and the shower/tub cuz it’s dirty and everyone thinks I’m weird.

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Hello, I’m still here.

I would urge you to try to remember also that we are all our creator's childre. Just because a person is on the registry does not mandate that they be evil. We have no idea of the details of his case. And occasionally, detectives and or prosecutors do stretch truth or outright commit fraud to ensure convictions when they become emotionally entangled. Understandable. They have hard jobs. People with bp or sz are especally vulnerable to such tactics because our stories have no credibility in the system, due to our collectively being mass-labeled crazy.

Hugs.

Hugs and love.

[QUOTE=Atypical_Disaster;6937495]Hello, I’m still here.[/QUOThugs.

Oh fack..

I woke up at 8:10am. I start work at 9:00am. I'm tireeeeddd.. But this will be 3/3 for the week. Just gotta get through it..

I think the weed and olanzepine might have made me really tired last night.

Just made fiancé breakfast and he said “I don’t wanna wake up right now. Why don’t you ever ask me if I’m hungry first...?”

And my feelings are really hurt.
I threw the breakfast away.

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

I literally follow my parents advice on how to keep a man. Especially my dads. Like be clean and look nice, like don’t be in sweats all the time. Cook. Clean. Be respectful.

Etc. lots of old fashioned stuff, I know. I guess guys aren’t like that anymore.

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Depends how you're raised. as for me I was raise to be respectful. Iwould of took a passive aggressive approach, eat the food you made for him, and tell him he can make his own breakfast.

That’s what Door2015 said too. I threw it away cuz I already had breakfast. He seems mad cuz it’s wasteful.

Whatever dude, ya know

"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com

Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Sketching using a tutorial. Raccoons

Awww. How sweet.

I wonder how much weight I've lost. I've not been eating a whole lot.

I am doing well today. I am just trying to figure stuff out. I had school yesterday, and that was good. The school is for eight hours, which is a long day, and I was tired afterward. But I felt like I did a decent job at school. And so that's a good thing. Some days I feel like things are worse, and I feel as if my mind is flat on my medicine, but I feel like the medicine helps a great deal. So sometimes I become slightly torn over it. I like practicing writing, though. It's a good thing in my life. It's something I can do. I like writing monologues and stuff like that. I want to get more work in translation and things like that. I almost got a proofreading job this past week, but they gave me very few directions on what they were looking for in the "practice test," so I blew them off. Now I am listening to Parquet Courts, a band from Brooklyn, New York, I am pretty sure.