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Old 10-17-2020, 05:15 PM   #771
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I feel so fckn empty, man. Wtf.
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Old 10-17-2020, 06:23 PM   #772
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I don't want to do anything. I literally lied down for 3 hours and stared at the ceiling.
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Old 10-17-2020, 07:05 PM   #773
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I had a reckoning with reality today while I was driving. It just hit me how bad this year has been and I had a good cry. Anyway, we can only take so much as humans. I am grateful for the ability to let emotions out quite honestly.
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Old 10-17-2020, 08:33 PM   #774
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Taking a break from social media for 2 weeks. Want to see how it affects my productivity and mood. Will be back on Halloween
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Old 10-17-2020, 09:39 PM   #775
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Taking a break from social media for 2 weeks. Want to see how it affects my productivity and mood. Will be back on Halloween
Do you consider this social media?
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Old 10-17-2020, 10:07 PM   #776
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Vape wild have gone out of business. So I had to ask my friend order from MBV. Coils and juice.

I had three new packs of coils but they were stolen. I wonder how much they get on the open market. So I ordered two more packs of coils and juice. I'm out of almost everything from VapeWild. Except the small 10ml they sent like 3 of on every order. They have given 30ml of juice free on every order!!!!! Maybe that's why they're out of business. But the little bottles contain anywhere from 6 to 0 mg of nicotine. Intended mainly for ppl whose tanks go through a 10ml fast, I think. Sub ohm.

Anyway, my friend opened it accidentally yesterday and hopefully will have sent it on to me. I'm worrying about additional theft. I want my vape juice very badly.

The cigarette fantasies brought back the bitter smell of smoke and ash trays. So I want my vapes more. I'm so sick of lockdown. I want to go home.
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Old 10-17-2020, 10:33 PM   #777
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And there's the gross yellow stain that gathers on the walls around picture frames and mirrors and clothes, on record albums and CDs, on my poor desk tops, on my beautiful jewelry, on my fingers. The awful grime. I've been watching TCM 24/7 and amazed that actors and actresses, in beautiful formal wear, are puffing away in these gorgeous gowns. I did see a couple of films in which the actress uses a cig holder, and that almost solves the stained fingers and nails. But not the awful yellow teeth. Gorgeous actresses actually willingly having tar all over their teeth! Amazing.

Bette Davis was a chain-smoker and you never get a real close up of her teeth or fingers. And she agreed to some really funky makeup in her 1960s roles so I don't know why she was shy about her teeth being brown. In Now, Voyager you can't keep up with the smoking for a smoking game. If you try a drinking game on it you'll be under the table by the end of the movie.

Oh well. I need my vape. I keep realizing that I can't inhale my vape here until weeks pass and it's an awful, desperate feeling.

One of my roommates makes annoying vocal sounds in her sleep, it's just another thing here.

Is this going to be like March where you think there can't possibly be a 2 week lockdown except it turns into another two weeks, and another, and another and another and 3 months have gone by. They tested me a few days ago and then again yesterday. I lost my sense of taste. I can taste things kind of but not like it was. I'm not that worried because I don't really have other symptoms. Please let me vape! Universe, please let me vape!
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Old 10-18-2020, 08:21 AM   #778
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Good morning all. I had an emotionally draining day yesterday but I'm back at it today. Just going to write a lot, maybe go to a writing meetup (in a park, socially-distanced). So life is good.
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Old 10-18-2020, 01:52 PM   #779
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 12AM View Post
I feel empty 😞
Can you describe this feeling in more detail for us? I feel this wsy most of the time. Hugs.
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Old 10-18-2020, 01:56 PM   #780
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
I posted this on fb just now:

Fiancé and I were talking about Christmas catalogs. He said he used to get the Toys-R-Us catalogs when he was a kid. I said I got the Neiman Marcus catalog as a kid. He said he saw all the coolest toys, and I was like “There were Aston Martin’s, designed by celebrities, in the back of the Neiman Marcus catalog. You could go out to lunch with like warren buffet.”. Omg I didn’t realize how spoiled I was as a kid. I got to choose stuff from that catalog. Takes me back.
Needless Markup. Yay!
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