Roll Call 177

Angelique67 · Nov 27, 2020 at 09:52 PM

Drinking another large glass of my current favorite beverage. I wish I had asked the SW if I could order candy from their Amazon prime account. I won't see her again until Monday at the soonest.

newtus · Nov 27, 2020 at 09:53 PM

Dustin is buying me a record player for Christmas. A real nice one from Urban Outfitters. It’s like burnt yellow color-ish. I want that boho/60s vibe in my living room. It’s semi there already. I’ll put the record player on a stand in the living room.

So anyway, yea so my old coworker is giving me a bunch of records for free. Says just Venmo him for what I think they may be worth cuz they are from cheap thrift store and doesn’t know all their conditions. Really nice dude

newtus · Nov 27, 2020 at 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Drinking another large glass of my current favorite beverage. I wish I had asked the SW if I could order candy from their Amazon prime account. I won't see her again until Monday at the soonest.

A large glass of your favorite bev is THE best! My favorite is Dr Pepper. I used to drink root beer but it’s sooo sticky. It gets everywhere even when U think it’s only been in the cup.

newtus · Nov 27, 2020 at 09:55 PM

Desoxyn · Nov 27, 2020 at 09:55 PM

Eternity only lasts less than a second. All you have to do is blink.

Erti · Nov 27, 2020 at 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

Psychosis, solipsism, woke, fear - I've been there. Trauma can make this philosophy worse. Be kind to yourself <3

You deserve to have the bad memories erased and a good reality without so much horrifying suffering..

It's like shrooms.. The skull and decaying bodies - Flowers growing, then dying - All going in fast forward like that episode in Futurama where they sit in the time machine and press keep going into the future watching until the end of time...

I once thought of myself spending eternity in a grave where my heart was still beating. The moon shines over me and maggots eat me.. There's horrifying things but what matters is that you have to try and get yourself out of the state.. It will happen by wanting to change through fear or love, etc and time.

But anything we think is an illusion - All that matters is what psychiatrists consider as a "normal" state of consciousness (For us).. That's what we get to find peace in.. Just the medication developed to this point sucks and they need to make better ones.

What society and culture thinks and what we can decide to change about it depends on us. Art can be made, songs - Any creation..

Beautiful minded souls are either ignored, laughed at or dismissed as crazy, wrong, feared, misunderstood, etc..

#HonestThoughts

What meds are you on now?

I’m on clozapine 550mg a day... gabapentin 300mg 3 times a day. Lamictal at 200mg a day Metformin 500mg twice a day.

Desoxyn · Nov 27, 2020 at 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

I’m on clozapine 550mg a day... gabapentin 300mg 3 times a day. Lamictal at 200mg a day Metformin 500mg twice a day.

If the clozapine could be increased without negative side effects (Like the white blood cell thing), it could probably work well - But you can't do that. Maybe adding an antipsychotic could help?

Sorry if I'm no help. My mood went down. I'm just trying to survive.

Angelique67 · Nov 27, 2020 at 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

A large glass of your favorite bev is THE best! My favorite is Dr Pepper. I used to drink root beer but it’s sooo sticky. It gets everywhere even when U think it’s only been in the cup.

I love root beer! My friend just sent me 10 bottles. It's diet so there's no sugar stickiness.

Angelique67 · Nov 28, 2020 at 12:02 AM

Craving my vape (even though I'm out of ejuice except for cinnamon and menthol). Have to change the coil today.

Erti · Nov 28, 2020 at 11:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

If the clozapine could be increased without negative side effects (Like the white blood cell thing), it could probably work well - But you can't do that. Maybe adding an antipsychotic could help?

Sorry if I'm no help. My mood went down. I'm just trying to survive.

It's ok.... I'm just glad someone see my post and of support.

Blue_Bird · Nov 28, 2020 at 02:03 PM

2 people who work at the mental health clinic I go to tested positive for coronavirus (I haven't actually been there in several weeks) but everything is switched over to phone appointments now anyway.

Blue_Bird · Nov 28, 2020 at 02:34 PM

It's getting really bad here in the city I live. Just wait, I bet someone in this building will get it then it will spread like wildfire around the building :/

Angelique67 · Nov 28, 2020 at 02:41 PM

I changed my coil and the liquid wouldn't wick. I was trying and trying and kept getting dry hits. I hope to God it will work finally. Weird, lots of anxiety right now.

Blue_Bird · Nov 28, 2020 at 07:12 PM

I ate some broccoli tonight since I'm trying to eat more vegetables.

My sister said if she buys a Christmas tree her friend is selling then she's gonna give me her old one. That would be cool. If not, I'll just buy one

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 28, 2020 at 07:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I ate some broccoli tonight since I'm trying to eat more vegetables.

My sister said if she buys a Christmas tree her friend is selling then she's gonna give me her old one. That would be cool. If not, I'll just buy one

I have a really tiny Xmas tree....comes in handy for storage......

Blue_Bird · Nov 28, 2020 at 08:30 PM

I feel so anxious tonight I want to just

Possible trigger:

punch myself in the face

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 28, 2020 at 08:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I feel so anxious tonight I want to just

Possible trigger:

punch myself in the face

Try to think of Christmas....calms me down.....not to sell you on it but we are loving frndly.....it’s a streaming service that pretty much only has hallmark channel.....7.99 a month in hd along with dvr functions....anyway, if you’re the same as me and bf it will really help you especially in covid Times, then just cancel after Xmas....

Blue_Bird · Nov 28, 2020 at 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Try to think of Christmas....calms me down.....not to sell you on it but we are loving frndly.....it’s a streaming service that pretty much only has hallmark channel.....7.99 a month in hd along with dvr functions....anyway, if you’re the same as me and bf it will really help you especially in covid Times, then just cancel after Xmas....

Can you watch on your laptop, or is it just for TVs?

Blue_Bird · Nov 28, 2020 at 08:57 PM

My sister says I have enough on Netflix and Amazon Prime.

Sometimes psychotic · Nov 28, 2020 at 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Can you watch on your laptop, or is it just for TVs?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

My sister says I have enough on Netflix and Amazon Prime.

You can watch on anything with the app.....well if you’re limited to Netflix and prime I’m going to recommend jingle jangle on Netflix, it was pretty good.

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Roll Call 177

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Angelique67 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Oct 2014 Location: USA Posts: 22,115 (SuperPoster!) 9	Nov 27, 2020 at 09:52 PM #121 Drinking another large glass of my current favorite beverage. I wish I had asked the SW if I could order candy from their Amazon prime account. I won't see her again until Monday at the soonest.
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newtus The Dopamine Flux Member Since Jun 2010 Location: Ardenweald Posts: 43,644 (SuperPoster!) 13 867 hugs given	Nov 27, 2020 at 09:55 PM #124 __________________ "We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living" The Dopamine Flux www.thedopamineflux.com Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,986 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,912 hugs given	Nov 27, 2020 at 09:55 PM #125 Eternity only lasts less than a second. All you have to do is blink.
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Angelique67 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Oct 2014 Location: USA Posts: 22,115 (SuperPoster!) 9	Nov 28, 2020 at 12:02 AM #129 Craving my vape (even though I'm out of ejuice except for cinnamon and menthol). Have to change the coil today.
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Angelique67 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Oct 2014 Location: USA Posts: 22,115 (SuperPoster!) 9	Nov 28, 2020 at 02:41 PM #133 I changed my coil and the liquid wouldn't wick. I was trying and trying and kept getting dry hits. I hope to God it will work finally. Weird, lots of anxiety right now.
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,740 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Nov 28, 2020 at 08:30 PM #136 I feel so anxious tonight I want to just Possible trigger: punch myself in the face __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,740 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Nov 28, 2020 at 08:57 PM #139 My sister says I have enough on Netflix and Amazon Prime. __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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