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Blue_Bird
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Default May 04, 2024 at 07:50 PM
  #1
Possible trigger:

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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Default May 04, 2024 at 07:55 PM
  #2
Anyway, that’s what’s up with me lately. I’m trying to get back on track though.

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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Default May 05, 2024 at 12:20 AM
  #3
Sorry BB No more weed.. Just one puff, that's all you need from a vape pen. It's strong AF.

I went for a hike today. I worked this morning. I don't feel very accomplished - A friend got jealous that I feel for a girl... and got me to block her. I'm tired of nonsense like this. He's deeply in love with me - I love him as a friend - He helped me with my trauma for 2 years and then tore it all down - Saying I'm immature, fake, a terrible person, and that I will burn in hell - Then regretted it badly. So I said sorry to her, but in any way I don't want relationships - I can't put in the long term effort.. I just want to be alone and study neurons etc...

Why do people love me.. All I do is hallucinate and overthink in isolation. But I have a lot of empathy, more than I realized.. It's like a loot of empathy - But I'm not an "empath" or anything special like that.

Maybe this forum helped idk.. Although I've always been this way as a kid - School was way too harsh for me.. The real world is harsh. I need to grow up.. But I want to keep my sense of wonder, curiosity, etc.. I want to grow up as in, I want the LIFE grow in me...
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Blue_Bird
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Default May 05, 2024 at 11:31 AM
  #4
Quote:
Originally Posted by Desoxyn View Post
Sorry BB No more weed.. Just one puff, that's all you need from a vape pen. It's strong AF.

I went for a hike today. I worked this morning. I don't feel very accomplished - A friend got jealous that I feel for a girl... and got me to block her. I'm tired of nonsense like this. He's deeply in love with me - I love him as a friend - He helped me with my trauma for 2 years and then tore it all down - Saying I'm immature, fake, a terrible person, and that I will burn in hell - Then regretted it badly. So I said sorry to her, but in any way I don't want relationships - I can't put in the long term effort.. I just want to be alone and study neurons etc...

Why do people love me.. All I do is hallucinate and overthink in isolation. But I have a lot of empathy, more than I realized.. It's like a loot of empathy - But I'm not an "empath" or anything special like that.

Maybe this forum helped idk.. Although I've always been this way as a kid - School was way too harsh for me.. The real world is harsh. I need to grow up.. But I want to keep my sense of wonder, curiosity, etc.. I want to grow up as in, I want the LIFE grow in me...
Hope you enjoyed the hike, that sounds nice. And you’re definitely accomplished even if it may not feel that way I’m trying to exercise daily, I feel it helps my mood a lot

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R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16

“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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