advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
Lurker1234
New Member
Lurker1234 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jan 2020
Location: Europe
Posts: 5
3 yr Member
14 hugs
given
Default Jan 31, 2020 at 03:28 PM
  #1
For some time my schoolmates have been insulting me and even spitting on me. When I complained to my teachers they said that it is all in my head and that without any evidence they can't do anything. Anyway the situation has got a little bit better but they still make rude comments. I know I should probably let it go but all my life I've been a doormat and I really don't want to allow them to get away with this. What should I do?
Lurker1234 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous42019, ARaven0137, bpcyclist, Buffy01, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul, Purple,Violet,Blue, Skeezyks, WovenGalaxy
 
Thanks for this!
ARaven0137, Buffy01

advertisement
bpcyclist
Legendary
 
bpcyclist's Avatar
bpcyclist has no updates.
 
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681 (SuperPoster!)
3 yr Member
40.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 01, 2020 at 02:52 PM
  #2
Bullying is never okay and in the USA, is illegal in most states, I do believe. Have you told your parents what is going on?

__________________
When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield
bpcyclist is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Fuzzybear, Lurker1234
 
Thanks for this!
Lurker1234, princesscookie19
Skeezyks
Disreputable Old Troll
 
Skeezyks's Avatar
Skeezyks has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
17.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Smile Feb 01, 2020 at 07:42 PM
  #3
Thanks so much for posting your concern here on PC. I'm an old man now. But many years ago, when I was in high school, I was tortured for 4 years by a gang of older boys. Everybody knew what was going on including my parents. But nobody cared. At one point one of the boys beat me up breaking my nose. I got blamed for it. At one point, out of desperation, I went to the school principle. He told me I should take a look at myself. It may be too strong a statement to say what I experienced ruined my life. But it sure didn't help.

There are studies that have been done showing that the effects of bullying continue on well into adulthood. Victims have higher rates of mental illness as well as diminished success in employment. I obviously don't know what conditions are like where you live. But, from my perspective, I believe it's really important you do whatever you can to resolve what is being done to you. Talk to your parents or a school counselor if there is one, or someone else... whatever you can do. You wrote that things have been a bit better recently. And, hopefully, that will continue to be the case. However, especially if things worsen again, my belief is it's going to be important for you to do whatever you can to stop the bullying.

There's a wonderful video of a talk on the subject of bullying that was given several years ago by former U.S. Assistant Secretary of Education Kevin Jennings. Here's a link to the video of it on YouTube. Perhaps it might be something you could share with your parents:

YouTube

I hope that, in some way, you will be able to find the support you need.

__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
Skeezyks is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
ARaven0137, bpcyclist, Fuzzybear, KD1980, Lurker1234, mote.of.soul, winter4me, WovenGalaxy
 
Thanks for this!
ARaven0137, Lurker1234, winter4me, WovenGalaxy
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,298 (SuperPoster!)
20 yr Member
81.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 02, 2020 at 10:03 PM
  #4
Bullying is not ok. I agree with the other posters.

__________________
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
bpcyclist, Buffy01, Lurker1234, mote.of.soul
 
Thanks for this!
Buffy01, Lurker1234
Anonymous42019
Magnate
 
Anonymous42019's Avatar
Anonymous42019 VOID
 
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 2,406
3 yr Member
3,106 hugs
given
Default Feb 05, 2020 at 06:27 PM
  #5
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lurker1234 View Post
For some time my schoolmates have been insulting me and even spitting on me. When I complained to my teachers they said that it is all in my head and that without any evidence they can't do anything. Anyway the situation has got a little bit better but they still make rude comments. I know I should probably let it go but all my life I've been a doormat and I really don't want to allow them to get away with this. What should I do?
First of all, I'm sorry for your situation. I've been there and I just want to say that it will get better, even if it might seem otherwise.

The first step would be to muster up courage and talk to your parents. Then your parent would contact your Student Support Officer at your school who will take action on your behalf. You will need courage to tell your parents, but they will be glad you told them because parents love their children and would always want to help. I'm a parent myself and feel the same for my daughter.

Another thing you can do is tell a teacher, sports coach, or any other adult you trust. Explain to them what's going on, and they will do their best to deal with it. I know it can be embarrassing to tell an adult, since you might be called a 'snitch'. It's completely up to you, don't be afraid to tell them. If you talk to them about keeping your conversation private, they won't tell anyone that you were the one that told them, and you won't be bothered about it.

You are not alone, and with a parent to help you, in the meantime do not make yourself fall into situation where you will feel inferior, because it is a downhill from there on.

Try not to look weak. Stand your ground to the point of totally ignoring them. Do not show the other person that they can dominate you. You see, usually, bullies are looking for a reaction from you. One of the things you can try is not reacting. Laugh it off, roll your eyes, or just completely ignore them. You might see that after a couple of days, they don’t bother you anymore.

This is what I did when at my school prior to being taken away for schooling at home, still I came up against bullies in my village. My father sorted them out and I am sure your parents will stand by you, too.

Do let us know how you get on. We'll be here for you.

__________________






Anonymous42019 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
bpcyclist, Lurker1234
 
Thanks for this!
Lurker1234
Buffy01
Wise Elder
 
Buffy01's Avatar
Buffy01 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,460 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
9,664 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 15, 2020 at 08:23 AM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lurker1234 View Post
For some time my schoolmates have been insulting me and even spitting on me. When I complained to my teachers they said that it is all in my head and that without any evidence they can't do anything. Anyway the situation has got a little bit better but they still make rude comments. I know I should probably let it go but all my life I've been a doormat and I really don't want to allow them to get away with this. What should I do?
I'm sorry that you have to experience this. Let me assure you that I do understand how you feel because this has happened to me. Talk to your parents and ask them to consult legal advice and see what kind of evidence you would need to prove bully.
Buffy01 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Lurker1234
 
Thanks for this!
Lurker1234
nicoleflynn
Grand Magnate
nicoleflynn has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jan 2012
Location: rochester, michigan
Posts: 3,111
10 yr Member
60 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 16, 2020 at 06:33 AM
  #7
This is verbal abuse.....people who do this are very insecure. The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans saved my life. It might help you. xo
nicoleflynn is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Lurker1234
 
Thanks for this!
Lurker1234
KD1980
Member
 
KD1980's Avatar
KD1980 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2018
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 368
5 yr Member
1,334 hugs
given
Default Feb 17, 2020 at 08:53 AM
  #8
Do you have a phone that can record audio or video? Maybe you can record them during the act.

Are there other students around to see it? Can they be your witness when you approach your teachers?
KD1980 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Lurker1234
 
Thanks for this!
Lurker1234
Lurker1234
New Member
Lurker1234 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jan 2020
Location: Europe
Posts: 5
3 yr Member
14 hugs
given
Default Feb 21, 2020 at 09:17 PM
  #9
I did record it but in my country recording people without their permission no matter the circumstances is a crime so I can't really prove it.
Lurker1234 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
KD1980
Fury
Member
 
Fury's Avatar
Fury Is accepting donations towards sister's stroke recovery. Sister is $saknme
 
Member Since: Oct 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 84
10 yr Member
3 hugs
given
Default Apr 28, 2020 at 06:13 AM
  #10
I would go to your version of the "school district" (the people who are in charge of the schools) and file a formal complaint against the principal, maybe request to be transferred to a different school of a similar distance. Ask these things and they will wonder: what led to you wanting to leave the school entirely? If it's that bad, the city should be prompted to look into it as the school administration is ignoring it

__________________

"I know you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant."
Fury is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:45 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.