advertisement
Closed Thread
Thread Tools Display Modes
Alyhart
Junior Member
 
Member Since May 2017
Location: McAlester
Posts: 14
6
46 hugs
given
Default May 29, 2017 at 07:58 PM
  #381
0 days I was getting somewhat better, nearly made it to a week and relapsed
Hope y'all are doing better!
Alyhart is offline  
 
Hugs from:
AmandaBroken, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
AmandaBroken, Bill3

advertisement
junkDNA
Comfy Sedation
 
junkDNA's Avatar
 
Member Since Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,301 (SuperPoster!)
11
8,149 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 29, 2017 at 08:06 PM
  #382
my voices really want to me to right no wbut im trying not to. im eating japanese food and then going to bed i hope they go away soon

__________________
junkDNA is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
AmandaBroken, Bill3
childofchaos831
Elder
 
childofchaos831's Avatar
 
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7
15 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 29, 2017 at 08:40 PM
  #383
Four and a half days... I am almost to my goal... I want to go to group in the morning, and be able to write on the check in sheet that I did not SH over the long, holiday weekend.

Right now, however, I am so close to caving... it seems the longer I go without, the stronger the urges get... I don't know if I can fight it anymore... my brain is telling me "putting that you only SHed once is still good" and part of me believes it...

I don't want to SH but I don't know if I can make it thru tonight...

__________________


Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
childofchaos831 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
Bill3
Legendary
 
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,924
15
24.1k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 29, 2017 at 09:00 PM
  #384
Hang in there childofchaos831!

Quote:
I want to go to group in the morning, and be able to write on the check in sheet that I did not SH over the long, holiday weekend.
Envision yourself doing this. Keep envisioning it! In the envisioning, what are you feeling while checking no SH?

What do you find helps you avoid SI when so tempted?

(((((childofchaos831)))))
Bill3 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
AmandaBroken
 
Thanks for this!
AmandaBroken, childofchaos831
spiritpanda
Member
 
spiritpanda's Avatar
 
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Roselle
Posts: 231
7
Default May 29, 2017 at 09:10 PM
  #385
0. sometimes I wonder if anyone tries to pay attention, than again, once you become an adult, your ignored. because of that reason I doubt I'll ever stop sadly
spiritpanda is offline  
 
Hugs from:
AmandaBroken
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
seesaw
Human
 
seesaw's Avatar
 
Member Since Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 8,345 (SuperPoster!)
10
1,262 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 29, 2017 at 09:51 PM
  #386
I'm just a few weeks away from 2 years... So right now it's...22 months and 29 days.

__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
seesaw is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3, childofchaos831, junkDNA, random_emotion, whisperingskye
random_emotion
Poohbah
 
random_emotion's Avatar
 
Member Since Sep 2015
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,258
8
96 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 29, 2017 at 10:09 PM
  #387
seesaw that is so amazing!!!!! You are doing great! Awesome job!!

__________________
Formally known as broken_one
It has been ___ days since I SIed -- Part V!
random_emotion is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, seesaw
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, seesaw
childofchaos831
Elder
 
childofchaos831's Avatar
 
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7
15 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 29, 2017 at 10:54 PM
  #388
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bill3 View Post
Hang in there childofchaos831!

Envision yourself doing this. Keep envisioning it! In the envisioning, what are you feeling while checking no SH?

What do you find helps you avoid SI when so tempted?

(((((childofchaos831)))))
It's a feeling of accomplishment... but it's almost like either tonight, or tomorrow, or the next day.. it's inevitable, unfortunately... it really depends right now on if I can sleep, without it... my anxiety and energy is pretty charged right now, so I'm not sure.

__________________


Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
childofchaos831 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
AmandaBroken
Account Suspended
 
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250 (SuperPoster!)
7
26.2k hugs
given
Default May 30, 2017 at 07:26 AM
  #389
86 Days...
AmandaBroken is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart
childofchaos831
Elder
 
childofchaos831's Avatar
 
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7
15 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 30, 2017 at 07:52 AM
  #390
Really minor SH last night... just enough to sleep. Barely even visible this morning, but it still counts, unfortunately.

__________________


Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
childofchaos831 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
junkDNA
Comfy Sedation
 
junkDNA's Avatar
 
Member Since Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,301 (SuperPoster!)
11
8,149 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 30, 2017 at 10:34 AM
  #391
Made it thru the night without doing it. Gold star

__________________
junkDNA is offline  
 
Hugs from:
4428247, Alyhart, AmandaBroken
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Blue_Bird
Blue_Bird
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Blue_Bird's Avatar
 
Member Since Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,719 (SuperPoster!)
10
14.3k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 30, 2017 at 10:40 AM
  #392
A couple days. I hadn't done it in a long time but got triggered by an extremely upsetting/stressful situation

__________________


R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16

“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
Blue_Bird is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
4428247
Member
 
4428247's Avatar
 
Member Since May 2017
Location: Fort Dix
Posts: 274
6
59 hugs
given
Default May 31, 2017 at 03:35 PM
  #393
4 days so far

__________________
----
I am not throwing away my shot
Major Depression, Generalized Anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, Self-Harm, ADHD-Inattentive, Dermatillomania
4428247 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
AmandaBroken
Account Suspended
 
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250 (SuperPoster!)
7
26.2k hugs
given
Default May 31, 2017 at 04:13 PM
  #394
Hi,

I want to thank everyone for their support during the time I was away.

For all those on this journey, I want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

I know you can do this. I know this because I have done it. I am doing it.

You are stronger than you think. Keep your eye on the bouncing ball. Be Safe...

Today is day 87...
AmandaBroken is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart
childofchaos831
Elder
 
childofchaos831's Avatar
 
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7
15 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 31, 2017 at 06:44 PM
  #395
Last time was yesterday... dissociated and came to sitting in my car in the parking lot of the ER.

Gave the one set of sharps from my car to the iop leader to dispose of, and then the one that I want to keep, just don't think I should have right now, to my individual T. Next step is to dispose of the sharps at my house.

It's been a rough day... can't go home yet, if I go home now, as anxious and panicky as I am, I will SH, most likely seriously...

Trying to lower the anxiety level... so that I can go home and get rid of the rest of the stuff, and then shower, and go to bed. I really can't keep doing this... I need to learn good coping skills, and I can't do that if SH is so readily available...

__________________


Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
childofchaos831 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
AmandaBroken
Account Suspended
 
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250 (SuperPoster!)
7
26.2k hugs
given
Default May 31, 2017 at 06:50 PM
  #396
I understand the struggle and want you to know that you are not alone. I to have given my sharps away, thrown them away, over and over again. I hope this works for you. It is a good thing you do. If you ever want to talk feel free to PM me.
AmandaBroken is offline  
childofchaos831
Elder
 
childofchaos831's Avatar
 
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7
15 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 31, 2017 at 10:38 PM
  #397
So the ones at home have been discarded as well... I am very near freaking out... just waiting for trazadone and seroquel to kick in now... I'm hoping to just sleep most of tomorrow. Getting an epidural steroid injection in the morning (with some heavy meds to knock me out), and then see my pdoc on Friday. I really need to get a handle on this, and most of me wants to, but there's still that part in the back of my head...

__________________


Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
childofchaos831 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
AmandaBroken
Account Suspended
 
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250 (SuperPoster!)
7
26.2k hugs
given
Default Jun 01, 2017 at 07:36 AM
  #398
Quote:
Originally Posted by childofchaos831 View Post
So the ones at home have been discarded as well... I am very near freaking out... just waiting for trazadone and seroquel to kick in now... I'm hoping to just sleep most of tomorrow. Getting an epidural steroid injection in the morning (with some heavy meds to knock me out), and then see my pdoc on Friday. I really need to get a handle on this, and most of me wants to, but there's still that part in the back of my head...
You are in my thoughts and prayers...

AmandaBroken is offline  
 
Thanks for this!
childofchaos831
junkDNA
Comfy Sedation
 
junkDNA's Avatar
 
Member Since Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,301 (SuperPoster!)
11
8,149 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Jun 01, 2017 at 01:02 PM
  #399
So I didn't make it

__________________
junkDNA is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
AmandaBroken
Account Suspended
 
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250 (SuperPoster!)
7
26.2k hugs
given
Default Jun 01, 2017 at 01:20 PM
  #400
Quote:
Originally Posted by junkDNA View Post
So I didn't make it
That's okay. Now pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start again.

If you ever need to talk I am open to that. Just PM me.

You are in my thoughts and prayers...

I offer you a gentle hug and a soft embrace.
AmandaBroken is offline  
Closed Thread
attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.

Thread Tools
Display Modes



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:34 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.