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Junior Member
Member Since May 2017
Location: McAlester
Posts: 14
6 46 hugs
given |
#381
0 days I was getting somewhat better, nearly made it to a week and relapsed
Hope y'all are doing better! |
AmandaBroken, Bill3
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AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Comfy Sedation
Member Since Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,301
(SuperPoster!)
11 8,149 hugs
given |
#382
my voices really want to me to right no wbut im trying not to. im eating japanese food and then going to bed i hope they go away soon
__________________ |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
given |
#383
Four and a half days... I am almost to my goal... I want to go to group in the morning, and be able to write on the check in sheet that I did not SH over the long, holiday weekend.
Right now, however, I am so close to caving... it seems the longer I go without, the stronger the urges get... I don't know if I can fight it anymore... my brain is telling me "putting that you only SHed once is still good" and part of me believes it... I don't want to SH but I don't know if I can make it thru tonight... __________________ Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Legendary
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,924
15 24.1k hugs
given |
#384
Hang in there childofchaos831!
Quote:
What do you find helps you avoid SI when so tempted? (((((childofchaos831))))) |
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AmandaBroken
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AmandaBroken, childofchaos831
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Member
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Roselle
Posts: 231
7 |
#385
0. sometimes I wonder if anyone tries to pay attention, than again, once you become an adult, your ignored. because of that reason I doubt I'll ever stop sadly
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AmandaBroken
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Human
Member Since Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 8,345
(SuperPoster!)
10 1,262 hugs
given |
#386
I'm just a few weeks away from 2 years... So right now it's...22 months and 29 days.
__________________ What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3, childofchaos831, junkDNA, random_emotion, whisperingskye
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Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2015
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,258
8 96 hugs
given |
#387
seesaw that is so amazing!!!!! You are doing great! Awesome job!!
__________________ Formally known as broken_one |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, seesaw
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken, seesaw
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
given |
#388
It's a feeling of accomplishment... but it's almost like either tonight, or tomorrow, or the next day.. it's inevitable, unfortunately... it really depends right now on if I can sleep, without it... my anxiety and energy is pretty charged right now, so I'm not sure.
__________________ Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250
(SuperPoster!)
7 26.2k hugs
given |
#389
86 Days...
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Alyhart
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Alyhart
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
given |
#390
Really minor SH last night... just enough to sleep. Barely even visible this morning, but it still counts, unfortunately.
__________________ Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Comfy Sedation
Member Since Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,301
(SuperPoster!)
11 8,149 hugs
given |
#391
Made it thru the night without doing it. Gold star
__________________ |
4428247, Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Blue_Bird
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,719
(SuperPoster!)
10 14.3k hugs
given |
#392
A couple days. I hadn't done it in a long time but got triggered by an extremely upsetting/stressful situation
__________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Member
Member Since May 2017
Location: Fort Dix
Posts: 274
6 59 hugs
given |
#393
4 days so far
__________________ ---- Major Depression, Generalized Anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, Self-Harm, ADHD-Inattentive, Dermatillomania
I am not throwing away my shot |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250
(SuperPoster!)
7 26.2k hugs
given |
#394
Hi,
I want to thank everyone for their support during the time I was away. For all those on this journey, I want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I know you can do this. I know this because I have done it. I am doing it. You are stronger than you think. Keep your eye on the bouncing ball. Be Safe... Today is day 87... |
Alyhart
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Alyhart
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
given |
#395
Last time was yesterday... dissociated and came to sitting in my car in the parking lot of the ER.
Gave the one set of sharps from my car to the iop leader to dispose of, and then the one that I want to keep, just don't think I should have right now, to my individual T. Next step is to dispose of the sharps at my house. It's been a rough day... can't go home yet, if I go home now, as anxious and panicky as I am, I will SH, most likely seriously... Trying to lower the anxiety level... so that I can go home and get rid of the rest of the stuff, and then shower, and go to bed. I really can't keep doing this... I need to learn good coping skills, and I can't do that if SH is so readily available... __________________ Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250
(SuperPoster!)
7 26.2k hugs
given |
#396
I understand the struggle and want you to know that you are not alone. I to have given my sharps away, thrown them away, over and over again. I hope this works for you. It is a good thing you do. If you ever want to talk feel free to PM me.
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
given |
#397
So the ones at home have been discarded as well... I am very near freaking out... just waiting for trazadone and seroquel to kick in now... I'm hoping to just sleep most of tomorrow. Getting an epidural steroid injection in the morning (with some heavy meds to knock me out), and then see my pdoc on Friday. I really need to get a handle on this, and most of me wants to, but there's still that part in the back of my head...
__________________ Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250
(SuperPoster!)
7 26.2k hugs
given |
#398
Quote:
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childofchaos831
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Comfy Sedation
Member Since Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,301
(SuperPoster!)
11 8,149 hugs
given |
#399
So I didn't make it
__________________ |
Alyhart, AmandaBroken, Bill3
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Alyhart, AmandaBroken
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Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 10,250
(SuperPoster!)
7 26.2k hugs
given |
#400
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