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Default Apr 22, 2019 at 06:22 AM
  #41
I gave up twilight series
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Default Apr 22, 2019 at 06:23 AM
  #42
It self harm
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Default Apr 22, 2019 at 06:27 AM
  #43
That is great advice! I wish that I had thought about that myself! I will keep that in mind!
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Default Apr 24, 2019 at 07:09 AM
  #44
Hang in there Kit! 😀

You are doing well!



Have a good day today!
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Default Apr 24, 2019 at 11:39 AM
  #45
Thanks Bill. Struggling a bit with SUI feelings which I know SH would eliminate, but I'm planning on sticking with my promise, even though it's hard. Just been praying to get through this time. HUGS Kit

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Default May 06, 2019 at 02:21 PM
  #46
Lent is over but I extended my promise to not SH until Pentecost. It's still a ways away. Right after Lent was over, I was really like, what did I do? Why did I make this promise? It's all going to be too hard, too much. It's been a little easier the past couple of days. I've had some urges. My cat scratched me when I picked her up and away from the dog food (she's diabetic so I really have to watch what she eats). And that was triggering because I wanted to cut after that. And for some reason, on Sunday mornings--the last time I cut was on a Sunday morning--I get a lot of urges. But I've been sticking with it. Mostly out of stubbornness I guess. I don't want to fail. I want to keep going. I'm trying to think beyond Pentecost, which I know my T will ask me, what happens after Pentecost? I'm not sure yet. I know to continue my progress, I'll have to make another promise because that seems to be the only thing that really works.

I still have a ways to get to Pentecost, so I'm trying to not get ahead of myself. After all, I may fail before then, though I hope not. Maybe I shouldn't be framing it as success or failure. But I don't know what else to frame it as. Either I make it, or I don't. Either I succeed at my goal or I fail. I feel like I am at a cross-roads. Either to push forward and try to make this a really big life change, or continue with what I'm doing, promising for a while, then going back to it, then promising for a while, then going back to it. It's really hard to not SH at times. It's like I can't think of other things when it's really bad. It's the physical thing that has been with me my whole life other than my faith. I think I'm grieving SH a little bit today. HUGS To all, Kit

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Default May 06, 2019 at 09:00 PM
  #47
You're doing amazing SlumberKitty! You've already succeeded and I hope you can continue. If using your faith and making a promise to a higher power gives you strength then use that. Use whatever tools you have. I hope as you go forward that it will become easier (it did for me). Cheering you on!
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Default May 06, 2019 at 11:05 PM
  #48
Do you find that you turn to God more, or differently, without SH or when faced with urges to SH?

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Default May 07, 2019 at 12:41 PM
  #49
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Do you find that you turn to God more, or differently, without SH or when faced with urges to SH?

Yeah, I used to just try to deal with everything myself, which I just made a huge mess of. But going to God when I want to SH really seems to be helping. I'm not alone in this struggle. Sometimes I can see God wanting to deliver me from this so I don't spend a lifetime stuck in the ravages of SH. I'm doing a lot more faithing Him. HUGS Kit

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Default May 12, 2019 at 12:18 PM
  #50
Hi Kit!

Just checking in, wondering how things are going, keeping you in my prayers. Hang in there!

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Default May 13, 2019 at 02:32 PM
  #51
Hi Bill, I had a rough weekend, but I didn't give in and SH. So I'm at 92 days right now. Looking forward til I can get to triple digits. I have to decide what to do after Pentecost. I don't want to break a promise to God. Been praying a lot. The temptation is there to give in. But I'm being strengthened from within. Thanks for your prayers, and your friendship. HUGS Kit.

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Default May 15, 2019 at 04:14 PM
  #52
I feel like I'm going to relapse. I feel it in me, like in my bones. I'm trying to hang on but I feel like it's futile.

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Default May 15, 2019 at 05:28 PM
  #53
(((((((Kit)))))))
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Default May 16, 2019 at 03:51 AM
  #54
((((((((Kit)))))))))
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Default May 16, 2019 at 11:21 AM
  #55
I made it through yesterday. I still feel like I'm going to relapse. I haven't yet. I'm trying to hang on. Kit

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Default May 16, 2019 at 03:51 PM
  #56
Well done Kit!

One day, one hour, one minute at a time. 🙂

You are doing terrific!

Is this your longest time without SI?

What helped you yesterday to not SI?

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Default May 16, 2019 at 10:42 PM
  #57
Go SlumberKitty! Almost 100 days is such an accomplishment. I know you've been struggling recently but try to think of what things have helped you in the last few months and keep doing those things. I find the best thing when I want to SH is to get up and move. Go for a walk outside if you can. Sometimes removing myself from the situation until the feelings pass helps me. I know you can do this. If I can do it so can you
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Default May 17, 2019 at 11:00 AM
  #58
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Well done Kit!

One day, one hour, one minute at a time. 🙂

You are doing terrific!

Is this your longest time without SI?

What helped you yesterday to not SI?

It's not my longest time without SH but one of the longest...I'm still doing my exercises and deep breathing and prayer (actually I exercised a bit less this week, bad weather and migraines). I'm more stressed though, work changes, financial problems, so my coping mechanisms are being overran by my emotions. I'm praying and I'm hanging on by my toenails. I just feel like a relapse is really close. I'm just trying to hang on. I see T tomorrow. Maybe she will give me some insights or something to help me not to give in. HUGS Kit

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Default May 17, 2019 at 11:02 AM
  #59
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Go SlumberKitty! Almost 100 days is such an accomplishment. I know you've been struggling recently but try to think of what things have helped you in the last few months and keep doing those things. I find the best thing when I want to SH is to get up and move. Go for a walk outside if you can. Sometimes removing myself from the situation until the feelings pass helps me. I know you can do this. If I can do it so can you
Thanks MsSunflower. I'm really trying. Exercise helps me too, I'm going to try to take a walk tomorrow because I've not exercised as much this week. And I see T tomorrow. So I'm going to try to hang in until I see T. Maybe she will give me some tools or techniques or something. Or we can work on my anxiety and feelings of failure or something that I'm dealing with and maybe I won't have to SH. HUGS Kit

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Default May 19, 2019 at 06:14 PM
  #60
I relapsed today. I couldn't keep going.

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